Take Me Away
by reginasforest
Summary: Outlaw Queen AU: Regina Mills is a beautiful woman. Regina Mills is a math teacher. Regina Mills is a wife. But first of all, she's a human being. Her husband keeps on abusing her and she just thinks that giving up on her life is the only solution. Can Robin Locksley, the new headmaster, give her what she needs? He makes her smile. And that, for Regina Mills, is already so much.
1. Chapter 1

**I'm not sure of absolutely anything about this story. I just know that I've had this idea, I loved it and tried to put it into words. I love this plot, it's really really angsty but... what can I say, I love angst. I know I should stop publishing 93478954 long-fics, but I just can't stop my fantasy. **

**please let me know if you like it, if I should continue, even if it sucks. it's okay. I just needed to know. thank you so much :)**

* * *

The bell rang and Regina Mills took a breath of relief.

It's just third period and she had still three ones left, but it was time for her launch break and she could finally dedicate some time to herself. For a quarter, at least.

"Miss Mills, the headmaster would like to meet you in his office." she heard someone knocking and then a feminine voice that woke her up from her thoughts.

"It's my launch time now, tell Mr. Locksley I'll be there in twenty minutes." she didn't know that man at all. She'd never met him, she just knew he was the new headmaster, that he'd been there for just a couple of days. But still, she'd heard many stories about him, about how _dashingly handsome _he actually was.

Probably he just wanted to introduce himself to her and Regina had no intention to waste the only free quarter she had that day with a man she barely knew.

The girl -who probably was one of the new assistants- nodded and smiled kindly at her before finally leaving.  
Regina smiled to herself and searched for a box in her purse which contained her launch: a ham and cheese sandwich and a bottle of water. It was all she had been able to take that morning before leaving her house as quickly as possible, while tears were filling her eyes and keeping her from seeing things clearly. Her face darkened at that thought and she looked down to her phone: no calls, one new message:

**Victor: ****_Good morning, babe. Sorry for last night. Have a nice day, love you._**

Even though that message was apparently sweet, Regina couldn't smile.

_Liar. Bastard._

Asking for forgiveness wasn't enough anymore and she knew it far too well.

"May I?" that knock again, followed by a voice; but this time it was warm, deep and low. Regina looked up and found her eyes completely buried in the ocean blue ones of the man standing right in front of her. _Oh, my God._

Before she could say a word or even just nod, he walked towards her and offered his hand:  
"Mr. Locksley." he introduced himself with a smile and Regina felt her knees getting weak. She immediately dropped the sandwich she was holding in her hands back in the box and cleaned her hands against her red skirt. _Shit._

"I'm sorry, I..." she was clumsy, just as if she had been caught doing something against the rules. "it's my launch break and I was eating..." she kept on trying to justify herself for not shaking his hand, as if her whole career depended on that, but he simply giggled and left his arm fall back to his side.

"it's okay. I knew it, I insisted to see you." his blue eyes penetrated hers for a long instant and her breath caught in her throat. Those eyes, those dimples, those thin but still so damn inviting lips, those blond hair that sligthly fell on his forehead.

_God, he's truly handsome._ Now, finally, she could understand her colleagues when they giggled and chatted in the corridors about how absolutely charming the headmaster was. He _was_ handsome. He _really_ was. And he had insisted to see _her._

"oh" she blushed lightly, looking down immediately.

"yeah, well... you're the only teacher I still had to meet in this school." he smiled at her and she swore she could feel her heart pushing against her chest as if it was begging to break free.

"oh. well, here I am." she shrugged with a sweetness she didn't think she had.

"I must say that I'm not disappointed. _At all."_ he whispered as if it was a secret that Regina had to keep, as if it was enchanted by her chocolate brown eyes and couldn't stop his mouth from telling exactly what was going on in his head.

Was he... _flirting _with her?! She felt butterflies in her stomach, the ones she used to feel when she was fifteen and had her first crush. For a moment, with him, she forgot about anything else; about how much she was suffering, about how miserable she actually was. What the hell was that man doing to her?

His eyes fell on the ring Regina was wearing on her left hand and his smile immediately dropped. She was married and he was definitely exaggerating.

He cleared his throat and smiled again, a bit uncomfortable.

"so... math, right?" his tone was gentle and kind and Regina kept on reminding herself that there wasn't anything strange in that conversation, that she didn't have to give herself false hope, because he was just the boss, trying to introduce himself to her for the first time, so he just _had _to be kind. And they were probably both married, anyway.

She had to stop feeling... _something _for that man.

"yes, right." finally she smiled too. Not a shy smile but a wide one. "it's so nice to meet you, Mr. Locksley."

"please, call me Robin." _Robin._ That was probably the sweetest but still hottest name she had ever heard in her whole life. She suddenly felt the need to pronounce it; she wanted to, she needed to hear how it sounded coming from her voice.

"and you can call me Regina."

"_Regina_." he said it like a scripture and for a brief moment she got jealous he'd gotten to say her name out loud and she didn't. It sounded just amazing coming from his deep, penetrating voice. "it's such a beautiful name."  
They locked their eyes again, this time for quite a long minute, until he finally spoke again: "is that your lunch?" he pointed to her sandwich with his index finger and arched a perfect eyebrow, clearly perplexed.

"yep."

"are you sure it'll be enough?" Regina noticed his skepticism and decided to play a little with him:

"are you judging?" she crossed her arms over her chest.

Robin looked at her for a second, as if it was trying to understand if she was serious or not, then he laughed:  
"not at all! I just... you know, the canteen is on the second floor, it's not that far, we have an elevator!"

Regina glared at him for an instant, then she burst into laughter too, loosening the grip around Robin's stomach:

"hey! You are the new guy here, not me. I know this school very well." why did it feel so natural to laugh with that man? It was like they had known each other their whole lives. What was different in him? How was he able to destroy all of her walls, even for a couple of minutes?

"it's just that I prefer staying here, alone." she shrugged and he smiled sweetly.  
"then I think I should go." for a moment, Regina hoped she had just imagined that last sentence. She really wanted him to stay; it was the first time in a very long time she felt comfortable alone with a man in a room. She just wanted to know him better, he was so nice with her, she wanted to keep on laughing with him, carefree like she had never been.

"it's been a pleasure, Miss Mills."

"Regina" she corrected him with a kind smile.  
"Regina." and again, a shiver ran through her back. It was amazing hearing her name coming from that warm voice, she wanted him to say it over and over again, in different circumstances. It was just able to stuck into her head.

"same, Robin." finally she left his name rolling off her tongue and she could almost swore she had seen him gasping for air as she did it.

His blue eyes slipped in her chocolate ones again, that long silence fell between them one more time and two shy smiles were painted on their lips. _Again. _Everything was so embarrassing, but they didn't feel the embarrassement at all.

They just stayed like that until one of them -him- swallowed hard and nodded, breaking that magic made up of looks and left her alone. _Again._

* * *

She stood still in front of her own house for a couple of minutes, in her car, her hands gripping the steering wheel and tears stuck in her chocolate brown eyes.

She could do that, she was strong enough. Maybe today Victor was of good mood, maybe it wouldn't happen again; maybe this time she would spare her pillow the tears she used to cry every single night.

Regina asked herself how far she could go with that story. She was miserable, so miserable that the only thought of coming back home frightened the hell out of her. So miserable that she kept on shutting all the people she had around out of her sad bubble; she didn't have a friend or someone to talk to. She didn't even accepted the help of a psychologist.

She just wanted to be alone, hold everything she felt back until she exploded.

Sometimes she thought if she could just die, everything would be so much easier. She'd gotten close to that, several times, when, during the night, in the middle of a fight, she'd locked herself in the bathroom and grabbed the razor. She'd gripped it hard, cried as silently as she could, but never dared to touch the blade. So she'd left it fall on the floor and suppressed the millionth sigh.

_You don't even have the balls to make this stop, Mills._

She passed a hand in her hair, trying to wipe away the bad memories; she took a leap of courage and opened the door.

"oh, look who's finally home! Miss Mills." his voice was the first thing she heard. She squeezed her eyes shut, took a deep breathe and calmed herself. _You can do it._

"hi, Vic." she tried to smile but when she saw him walking towards her with a pervert smile on his face, she couldn't help but shiver. She felt his dirty hand resting on her cheek, there when he had used such violence the night before.

"how was your day, babe?" he smiled and for a second she thought she was going back in time, to seven years before, when everything was still perfect. When they were _"__madly in love"._

"good. I've had all the classes today. It was challenging, but i'm finally home. I have to check some tests, then I can finally rest." she was saying things she was sure he didn't give a damn about; things she had never told him in three years.

"interesting. I've waited for you to come home to have launch." _you waited for me because you wanted me to prepare you launch._

"I've already had launch, but I can prepare you something. What do you want to eat?" she bit her lip, damning her own self for being so nice with him after everything she'd been through because of that man. Last night, the one before, the week before; every day in the last three years.

"_you._" he buried his face in her neck and started to bit, suck, lick it. Regina felt her stomach turning upside down, an incredible sense of nausea invading her completely until she felt the vomit burning the bottom of her throat.

"Vic... I'm very tired..."

"come on, I've been waiting since this morning." it wasn't a request, but an order, and she knew it far too well. _Please. Just not now._

"Victor" she moaned as she felt his cold hands slipping under her clothes, on her hot skin.

"mmh..."  
"Victor, I have to..." with a strength and a courage she didn't think she had, he pushed him away and ran to the bathroom, opening the door and bending over the toilet to throw up what was left of the cheese and ham sandwich she had eaten at launch. _Shit._  
At the thought of her launch, the memory of Robin and how he had lighted up her day for a second came back to her.

"god damn it!" she heard him shouting from the kitchen, right before an incredibly loud noise. He had punched the table, hard, making it shake completely. Regina squeezed her eyes, again.

"I'm not even allowed to fuck you! Now I make you vomit?!" he walked towards her, gripping her arm, forcing her to stand up.

"Victor, please... it's just... I think I caught the flu. It's not you."

"Oh, that I know!" he shouted "it's _you. You_ are the fucking problem, Regina. You can't even satisfy me anymore!" her back was pressed hard against the cold wall and she could perfectly feel his breath on her neck. His awful, putrid breath.

"I'm... I'm sorry."

"you should thank me because I still find you attractive. You're 37, Regina, open your eyes! Who would find you even interesting if not me?!"

Perfect. Now she wasn't even decent to his eyes anymore. She was... just attractive. She was just a fancy way of satisfying his needs.

"I'm sorry. W-we... we can try again, if you want. I can make it work, just... give me a second" the only thought of having him inside of her, of feeling him thrusting and touching her deepest spots made her want to throw up again, but if that was the only way to stop all of that... she was going to do it.

"of course!" he said ironically "do you think it's easy to make it hard again?" while he said -or better, _shouted- _so, he unzipped his trousers and pulled down his boxers. Regina looked up, trying to look anywhere but at that sick situation. She felt the nausea coming back and closed her eyes.

"look at it. And think you could've had it all, hard, deep inside of you. Look at it now. Look what have you done." he ordered but she refused to obey. She kept on staring at the ceiling, praying whoever was up there that that torture would be over soon.

"_LOOK AT IT!" _Victor shouted, gripping her head and forcing her head down. Regina couldn't hold back a sigh and she damned herself for it.

"I've already told you that I'm sorry" she murmured softly, trying to hold back her tears as much as she could. But it was useless, they were already rolling down her cheeks.

"I don't give a shit about your apologies!" he left her fall against the door and there she cried, silently, as always.

Everything seemed to stop for a moment; Victor was there, a few steps away from her, passing a hand through his dark hair, trying to calm himself down. Regina was still on her feet -she didn't know how, where she found the strength to stay like that- against the wood of the door, mentally praying that she could finally be alone. For a couple of minutes, just the time to cry her soul out. Just the time she needed to explode in sighs.

"go check those fucking tests that make you feel all proud of yourself. You ruined everything." as he said so, he was about to leave, but not before he whispered _bitch_ when he got sure she was hearing him.

"Victor" she called him, her voice broken by the tears "I want to divorce."

He looked at her for a second, from the bottom to the top, completely. His eyes were serious for just a moment, then he burst into a laughter, out of nowhere, as if he was crazy. He walked to her and slapped her face, hard. Then he left.

She left her back slide down, till she was sitting on the floor. She closed the door and finally let go all the tears, all the sighs, all the screams she had tried to hold back for too long.

* * *

**I know. The angst. I'm sorry.**

**thanks for reading! xxo**


	2. Chapter 2

**hey guys! thank you so much for all the reviews/follows/favs! i'm so impressed, really! thank you, thank you, thank you! I'm so glad you liked this story as much as I did.**

**hope you enjoy this chapter too :)**

* * *

"I found him smoking." she said firmly, while she nervously played with her fingers under the headmaster's desk.

Robin was looking at her with watchful eyes, his chin on his knuckles, an arched eyebrow and a kind smile.

"mh. In the bathroom?"

"no, next to the window, in class, before the bell rang."

"oh. Well, it's a serious thing." while he said so, he riffled through his agenda, scrolling his finger down the phone numbers he had written on it until he found the one he was looking for; then he took his phone. Regina was looking at him with the corner of her eye, careful not to be noticed: he was handsome with the phone stuck between his cheek and his neck, his eyes lost somewhere undefined and that patient and kind smile always printed on his lips.

Regina wasn't expecting to see him again, not that soon anyway. But she kept on reminding herself that that was her job, it was her duty to report a student's infraction, he was the headmaster and he needed to know. There was nothing more. Just the job.

"he'll be here in a moment." he said, hanging up the phone. He buried his blue eyes in hers and his kind smile turned in a sweet one. Regina felt her heart melting in her chest, so she smiled back to him.

"I... I don't think it's necessary to suspend him." she said, trying hard to keep talking about school and nothing else. Robin looked amused:  
"In fact I won't."

"good." she looked away, not able to stand that man's blue eyes that were making her feel amazingly strange, like she hadn't been feeling for so long.

"so... it's better for me to go. I have the break now."

"cheese and ham sandwich again?" this time he left himself go to an amused giggle.

"tuna and tomato. And you should stop judging me anyway!" she laughed too. Fuck everything, she felt so good with that man. Fuck the scholastic situation, he was able to light up her never-so-darker days and she didn't want anything to hold her back from enjoying the time she spent with him fully.

"oh but, you know, you make me feel funny." he said between smiles and Regina's heart lost a beat. She found it hard to breathe and, for a second, she worried about blushing definitely too much for such a silly thing he had said.

"mr. Locksley, Mc Kluskey is here." a third voice -the same one who had interrupted her launch the day before- interrupted them. The boy walked in with a smug smile, so sure of himself that Regina felt nauseated. He was dressed in black, his hair dark and curly, his brown eyes were shining with sureness. He was some kind of familiar to her.

The woman left the three of them alone and Robin's eyes slipped out of Regina's to stay focused on the boy:  
"you know is prohibited to smoke inside the school, don't you?"

"in fact I was smoking outside."

"your math teacher told me she saw you smoking in the classroom." Mc Kluskey looked at Regina from head to toe, lingering his eyes on her cleavage, arching an eyebrow at how much it was showing. Regina felt the guy's eyes on her and she felt like a piece of meat. _Disgusting. _She looked down, trying to ignore that devastating sense of nausea that only Victor, until then, was able to cause her.

"my arm was actually _out _of the window." he chuckled, keeping on staring at her with that smug smile of his that Regina would have been more than happy to slap away from his face.

She heard Robin's voice:  
"it's against the rules anyway. This time you'll get just an admonition, but next time you'll get suspended." he said serious, putting on his glasses to read some papers. For a second, Regina seemed to forget about Mc Kluskey's presence and she dedicated her attention to Robin: he was even more handsome with the glasses on, if that was possible. They made him look more like a professor and she loved it. _A lot. _She found herself fantasising about a man for the first time in years; years during which she had only been scared about having a naked man in front of her. But with him, oh, G_od..._ what was he doing to her? Why did she feel like he wanted to see _all_ of him? why did she feel like she wanted to _have _all of him? It was so wrong, but still, it felt so right.

She smiled when she was sure he wasn't looking.

"Mr. Locksley." the guy nodded to Robin, then he looked at Regina and winked at her: "Miss. Mills."

Robin didn't notice it but Regina did, since Mc Kluskey had made sure his eyes were buried deep in hers. She felt her stomach turning upside down, like when she was at home with Victor. She couldn't even be respected from her students, now.

The guy walked out and she followed him immediately:  
"how dare you, Mc Kluskey?" she shouted

"oh, come on, Miss Mills! Don't lie to me, I saw how you look at me during your classes, I saw the way you blush everytime I look back at you!" he got closer and caressed her arm, making his hand fall from her shoulder to her elbow. She shivered. The same horrible sensation she felt everytime Victor touched her.  
"Mc Kluskey..."  
"oh, please, call me Josh. And give me your number so I can call you whenever I'm bored at night." he chuckled while his hand travelled lower and lower, behind her arm, until he reached for her back. He grabbed her ass hard, making her jump on her feet. Regina reacted, this time: she stepped back and slapped him right on his face.

"how dare you?! I'll suspend you!"

He laughed at her:  
"you don't have the balls, Miss Mills." as he said so, he ran away.

"MC KLUSKEY!" she shouted in vain. She felt Robin's office's door opening and he suddenly was there, he had her back, he was ready to fight with her, fight _for _her. But maybe... this time, he was too late.

"what happened?" he asked worried.

Regina swallowed hard. It was her occasion. She could tell him everything, or, at least, just what had happened in that corridor; she could make that guy pay for treating her like a piece of meat.

She could stop being weak for a second and accept someone's help. But she didn't.

"nothing, he was just... running in the corridor." she looked down and he noticed that that light she had a few moments before in his office, had slowly started to fade away. He had to do something to light it up again, he didn't care about the rest:  
"you know, for today, my launch break is gone and I have to go back to work. You know whose fault it is?" he said giggling, pretending to look at his watch. Regina finally looked up to him and smiled:  
"not mine, Locksley!" she chuckled.

Yeah, there It was. That light.

"oh yes, it appears to be yours, Mills. So, I was thinking... what could you do to be forgiven?" it was crazy how she didn't feel uncomfortable with that man at all, not even for a moment. It all felt so natural, how it supposed to be in a normal relationship between a man and a woman. There was an unexplicable and bizarre complicity between the two of them, a complicity that they had built up in less than 48 hours.

"I won't work overtime, I'm telling you."

"Oh, no no, in fact I'm asking for... a longer break." his smile widened while he pronounced his invitation: "I'd like to offer you launch. And I'm not talking about that odd kind of launch that you like, made up of a sandwich and a bottle of water. I mean a real launch. Here, in my office. I'll order something from the best restaurant I know and I'll make room on my desk. Do you think you can accept my request, Miss Mills?"

Her heart was beating crazily and she couldn't do anything to stop it. She couldn't believe her ears: he had really asked her out for launch! Well... maybe not exactly _out. _It was actually _in _his office; but it didn't matter. He wanted to spend his break with her, he wanted to know her better, just as much as she wanted it too.

"yes, of course. I'd love to." she said, trying to stop her voice from getting squeaky. Robin smiled widely:  
"so, launch in my office it is. Tomorrow at 12.30. I'm counting on it."

"I won't miss it." she smiled back and, this time, her smile reached her eyes too.

* * *

Nothing and no one was going to take that beautiful smile away from her that morning. She woke up feeling absolutely great, for the first time in forever. The only thought of seeing Robin again made her eyes sparkle with joy and made the butterflies fly around her stomach.

They were such wonderful sensations that she hadn't felt in a very, very long time. Sensations that she wanted to feel every single day of her life.

She kept on repeating herself that all of that was wrong. She was a married woman and probably he was married too. And even if none of them was, he was her chief. But the more she thought about it, the more she realized that she didn't give a damn about all of that: she wanted to spend some time with him. And her marriage... for all she cared, her marriage was over anyway.

_You always have to bow your head, Regina. Marriage is sacred, it has to be honored. Always. No matter what will happen, you'll always have to respect the promises you made to Victor._

Her mother's words resounded in her head like a melody and, immediately, her smile faded away. She asked herself what would she think of that whole situation: would she tell her to save her marriage even if she'd told her her husband beated her up every single day? Maybe if Cora was still alive, she could have asked her what to do.

She remembered it quite well when she said to her that she was still married to her dad because it was _what good women do; _she didn't feel anything for him anymore, neither did he, they didn't even share the bed anymore, but it didn't matter. To the people, to their friends, they were just as married and in love as ever.

What mattered was to always make a good impression.

Regina knew that there was no escaping that mortal trap she kept on calling "marriage", not even if she wanted to: she had tried a million times to ask Victor for divorce, but the answer had always been the same: a slap right in her face. Maybe, one day, she would find the courage to talk to somebody, maybe for the first time in her life, she would be able to ask somebody for help. And that somebody, maybe, was the man she was going to have launch with, that morning.

She didn't know why but she knew she could trust Robin Locksley. Of course, she wasn't going to talk him _then _or anytime soon, but maybe, when it was the right time... she was going to open herself up.

_Maybe. If he's not married. If he still wants to talk to you after a single date, Mills._

"where you think you're going dressed like that?" Victor's sleepy voice coming from the bed made her jump on her feet. Usually, he didn't wake up before noon, he used to spend the rest of the day on the sofa, watching tv and doing god only knew what until she was home to prepare him meals. Jeez, she hated him so much.

"to work." she said, trying not to sound as annoyed as she actually was. She was scared of his reaction.

"on the street?" he chuckled to himself "because that's what it looks like, with that skirt." Regina looked down and for a second she asked herself if he wasn't right. Maybe she had exaggerated. She gave a quick look to the mirror and shook her head: there was nothing wrong with that red knee-length skirt she was wearing, nor with that white shirt she loved so much. Yeah, maybe she had left the first two buttons opened, and yes, her legs were naked, but she tried to convince herself that there was no particular reason named _Robin Locksley_ why she did it.Really. Not at all. It was just... hot. In school. Generally.

"I don't want the other men to stare at your legs and boobs all the time." he said, sitting on the mattress.

Regina kept her eyes stuck on the floor, trying hard not to look at him.

"there are no men in school. Only women." she lied. Maybe, that would stop his questions and allow her to leave that god damn house without being forced to change her clothes. Because he was going to ask for that, she was more than sure.

"oh, well... then I think I should come visiting you at school more often." he laughed "you know, I really need to remind myself how a real woman looks like, sometimes." Regina felt the tears pushing to get out of her eyes. She was sure she didn't give a shit anymore about what her husband thought of her; she didn't love him anymore, she would give whatever just to not see him anymore; but there was something in his words... they felt like a knife right in her heart.

"why don't you get yourself one, then?" she snapped and bit her tongue not even a second after, mentally damning herself, already tasting his slap.

"what makes you think I haven't already?" instead, he laughed; he laughed at her, at her sufferance. Moment after moment, word after word, day after day. He had taken away all the happiness from her, and he was soon to take her life too, she was sure of that.

Regina left her home without saying anything else, while all she could hear were his laughters, and she asked if what he had just said was true.

If he was cheating on her... why was she feeling so guilty for seeing a colleague she barely knew for launch? Was it about her mother's words?

_You're an idiot, Regina._

This time, she told herself, the voice in her head was right.

* * *

The lesson ended at 12.20 and she arrived at her locker at 12.25, nervous as she'd never been, trying to arrange as quickly as possible all the papers she had in her hands. There, under the register, she found a note, written on a very familiar yellow post-it. _To Regina. _Her heart started beating so fast, making her feel like one of her students with their crush. She read it and blushed lightly:

_**Waiting for you. On time. Or I'll fire you.**_

She wanted to laugh; she swore she could actually hear Robin's giggle.

God, the way he made her feel... in different circumstances, she'd say he was flirting with her, but she kept on telling herself that she shouldn't give herself false hope, her heart wouldn't be able to handle another delusion.

_Stop it, _she kept on repeating in her mind, as if she wanted to stabilize her heartbeat.

She walked, or better, she _ran_, as much as her heels allowed her, to the headmaster's office and, once she arrived, she took a long, deep breath. She could do that. She was a grown woman, she had to stop acting like a teenager with her first crush.

She knocked and opened the door with a smile that she thought she had lost years before:  
"may I?"

"Miss Mills!" Robin exclaimed looking at his watch "two minutes late. I think you should reconsider your conduct in the future." he wanted to pretend to be angry but he simply couldn't, so he burst into a laughter that Regina couldn't help but return. She was so comfortable with that man, even when he had closed the door and they remained alone... she had always been scared, since Victor had started to beat her up, of staying alone in a closed room with some guy. But Robin was... _oh_, so different.

"wine? It's the best I had at home." he handed her a wonderful glass of red wine that Regina couldn't help but appreciate. He had done all of this _for her. _

"should I think that you want me to get drunk?"

"mmh, maybe. But I'm not used to women with a ring on their finger." he pointed at her wedding ring with his index finger and there Regina's face darkened. _Shit. _She had ruined everything with her own hands, now there wasn't even a little possibility that he could find her... _what, Mills? Datable? You knew that there wasn't going to be anything between the two of you, you knew it from the beginning. _

"please, have a seat." his voice woke her up from her thoughts and made her focus on what usually was his desk. Until that moment, she hadn't noticed the way he had organized it perfectly, with a blue table cloth, two plates that contained what definitely appeared to be fantastic food, a bottle of wine and the bread basket in the middle. Everything was so intimate, and cute, and perfect.

"I brought the bread, in case you want to prepare yourself a sandwich." he made fun of her and she laughed.

During the whole launch, they talked about them, silly questions, silly answers, they were laughing like crazy idiots, they couldn't stop smiling for a second. Regina was feeling great, she won't even think about what he had told her before, it was in the past. Ok, maybe they weren't going to be more than friends, but she surely wanted that man to be a part of her life.

They chatted, he asked her how many years she had been teaching, If she liked her job; Regina asked him if he had children. He didn't.

"me and my... ex-girlfriend tried hard, years ago, but... nothing. It wasn't mean to be, probably."

"well, you're still young. Maybe you can... try again. With... with the right woman." she bit her lip as she blushed like an idiot and her eyes slipped into Robin's. _Oh, God._

"yes, maybe. With the right one." he repeated, as if he was charmed by her eyes. A shiver ran through both of their backs, completely shaking them, forcing them to look away.

Robin cleared his throat and asked his next question:  
"what about you? Do you... have children?"  
Regina shivered again, but this time it wasn't a pleasant shiver. She remembered it perfectly, because that was the exact reason her marriage had turned to be so miserable, three years before. She and Victor had tried so hard to have their own child, but it didn't work out. He kept on blaming her, saying he was absolutely healthy and she wasn't; so he forced her to make some blood tests and... he was right. She couldn't have children. And there it all started; the first fights, the first slaps, the first tears.

"no, I... I don't." her face darkened but this time he noticed it and put her hand over hers.

"hey... I didn't mean to upset you. I'm so sorry." Regina didn't wince at his sudden touch. It was all so natural between them, all so comfortable. She felt his warm hand on hers, cold as ice, and she smiled at him. Like she had never smiled to anyone.

"it's okay. It's just... you know, bad memories. That's it." he only smiled back when he had made sure she still had the spark in her eyes that she had had during the whole launch.

"So..." he exclaimed, removing his hand from hers to stand up. Regina couldn't deny she was sorry for that: she was already missing the contact between their skins. "I brought the dessert too, Miss Mills. I won't let you go away thinking that I'm horrible at organizing launches."

"I never thought that. Not even for a second. Everything was delicious." she stood up too, helping him packing the dishes to bring them back home.

"I'm assuming this will be our first and last launch together, won't it?" she watched him biting his lower lip, hesitating. Robin didn't want to sound so eager to see her, most of all because she was a married woman and he wasn't used to flirt with married women. But there was something so different with her; something that simply felt so right.

"absolutely not. Next time, it's on me. But in a real restaurant." Regina giggled.

"oh no, milady. I won't allow you to pay me launch, ever."

_Milady. _While her heart kept on looking for a way to jump out of her chest, Regina took a deep breath:

"it would be a pleasure, Robin, really. I have to return the favor. Please, just... tell me when you're available." _Oh, God._ She couldn't believe she had actually said it. The only thought of seeing him again, that _he _actually wanted to see her again, made her feel a grip around her throat. Yes. It was really happening. "if you want, you can give me your number, so maybe we can..." she constantly bit her bottom lip, nervously, as if she was scared of the words that could come out of her mouth.

_Actual five-years-old, Mills._

"absolutely." he replied with a smile that was, at the same time, able to calm her down and to make her heart beat faster. She loved that man's smile, quite a lot.

Robin bent over his desk to write his number on one of his yellow post-it's, making her smile, then he handed it to her. Regina took a moment to focus on the long fingers that were holding the piece of paper: she asked herself how they would feel against her skin. They would be delicate, a delicacy that she didn't know anymore, they would caress every single inch of her body, healing every wound, filling all the gaps.

_Stop it, Mills._

She shook her head and took the post-it: "thanks."

"thank _you_ for this wonderful hour. I hope I finally found at least one friend in this school!" he giggled and Regina tried to convince her heart that the only reason he kept on considering her _a friend_ was because of that goddamn wedding ring that she kept on wearing. If only there wasn't Victor...

"my pleasure." and she smiled.


	3. Chapter 3

**hello everyone! this chapter is a little bit shorter than the previous one, but I needed to post before the holidays because I realised that I didn't wish you a happy xmas! oh gosh, I'm a horrible, horrible person :( I'm so sorry! Merry Christmas and happy new year everyone! Hope you have a good time with the people you love :)**

**thanks for all the follows/favs &amp; review, they really mean a lot to me.**

**hope you enjoy this chapter too!**

**WARNING: STRONG CONTENT. **

* * *

It took her days, several dates, before Regina could finally, completely open up her heart to Robin. One day, while they were having launch together in a restaurant across the town, where no one could ever reach them -and Regina was feeling terribly reassured by that-, she decided to talk to him about her marriage:  
"things with Victor aren't... aren't going well. From quite some time." she confessed, taking a sip of wine from her glass. Robin was surprised by that statement, but he decided not to say anything and keep on listening carefully at every single word she was saying:  
"we, just like you and you ex-girlfriend, tried to have a baby. Victor wanted it more than anything, and I wanted it too, really. We were so in love, even after four years of marriage..." she couldn't help but smile at the old, good times. "we wanted to have our own family, with our kids, you know. We tried, and tried, and tried, until the thing became vital for Victor. To him, it was much more important than our marriage, than _us_. We had sex so many times a day, even when I didn't want to, he..." she bit her lip. Maybe she shouldn't continue. If she had talked with someone, with _Robin_, about how Victor forced her to have sex with him, even when she was tired, even when she was back from a very busy day and she was exhausted... it didn't matter how many tears were falling down her cheeks while they made it, he had a goal and he wanted to reach it. No matter what.

She had never told anybody how much she had suffered during that period, and then she was about to do it, with Robin. Her heartbeat accelerated as she continued: "he forced me. Until one day I suggested to stop. There he pushed me to do some blood tests, to find out what the real problem was. I..." a tear fell on the table-cloth and there, Regina Mills realized she had been crying the whole time. _Shit. _"_I_ was the problem. I can't have children, Robin. I can't." she quickly grabbed her napkin and dried as many tears as she could, until he stopped her by putting his hand on hers, with a delicacy that Regina didn't know anymore. He pulled her chair close to his, took the napkin from her hands and started to wipe away every single tear, to calm every single sigh, until she felt ready to talk again: "he never looked at me the same way since he found out about it. He kept on telling me that a woman who can't have children is not a real woman." another tear escaped from her control, a tear for all the slaps, all the screams she had refused to tell him about. _One step at a time, _she told to herself.

"I begged him to divorce me, to find a woman who could give him what he wanted the most, since I couldn't. He refused, he told me that marriage is sacred and it has to be honored, no matter what. And if I wanted to preserve my dignity I had to remain his wife. He still doesn't want to divorce me, even though I see how he looks at me in the eyes everytime. Like I ruined his whole life." her mother had always liked Victor and now, listening to her own words, Regina could see why: both of them were convinced that marriage constrained two people for the eternity, no matter what happened between the two of them. No matter if love got substituted by sadness and pain, and tears.

"Regina, you know you can legally obtain the divorce anyway, right?"

"I know! I know but..." _I'm afraight he might kill me _"I have faith. Maybe he will change, maybe he'll be the Victor I fell in love with again, the Victor I married seven years ago."

Robin immediately took his hand away from hers and stopped drying her tears:  
"are you... are you still in love with him?" it was a simple and legitimate question, to which she should have answered "no". Because it was the truth, it was what she had wanted to shout at him for weeks. But, instead, she replied a simple "yes", because it was what was best for everyone. If she had told him she didn't love Victor anymore, she would have encouraged him; she would have made him think that he could build something with her, something she died to build. But she was scared to put him in such danger, because God only knew what Victor was capable of if he eventually found out.

"oh." Robin replied simply, pulling away. "well you... you could try with marriage counseling." there was something different in his voice and his behavior, something she herself had caused by telling a simple, brief lie.

Now what? Had she ruined everything they had? Would they stay friends or not? She would prefer dying rather than staying away from that man.

"yeah. We could. But I don't want to talk about me anymore. Let's talk about you, shall we?"  
He smiled at her, but his smile didn't reach his eyes as it usually did. It was rather that kind and elusive smile that he was used to give to everyone else.

_You're an idiot, Regina._

* * *

That night, Regina couldn't sleep. It'd been three days since their last launch together and Robin didn't even texted her anymore. It was unusual since, since they'd started seeing each other, not a day passed by without a text from one of them, even just to say "hello". Regina knew she had fucked everything up; she had known it since she had pronounced that "no", since she had seen him pulling away, physically and metaphorically.

He had left her with a simple "see you tomorrow", but the day after they didn't see each other. Nor the one after. Regina had thought about texting him, even just to ask how he was, how he _really_ was; but something had stopped her from doing it. That night, however, something changed: she was in her bed, she kept on staring at the ceiling and thinking of him, of how much she missed him in her life; his laugh, his deep blue eyes looking straight into her soul. She turned to the bedside table and looked at the clock: 2 AM. She took her phone and opened the conversation with Robin: _**"**__**miss you"**_ she wrote and stared at the screen for a couple of seconds. Nah, too romantic. It surely didn't suit the situation. She cancelled it. _**"**__**miss us." **_this time she smiled proudly to herself. Yes, it was exactly what she wanted to tell him; it was the pure and simple truth.

She sent it without a second thought and smiled, thinking of him reading it the morning after, right after opening his wonderful blue eyes.

_Damn_, she wondered how he looked like in the early morning; what did he wear to sleep? What if..._oh, god_, what if he slept shirtless? She shook her head and blocked her phone, smiling as she put it back on the bedside table. She thought she could finally sleep peacefully.

She was wrong.

"what the hell were you doing?" Victor's voice, not sleepy at all as it usually was, made her shiver. _Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit._

"nothing, I just... wanted to know what time it was." she tried to lie, hoping that the darkness of the room could help her hiding the fear in her eyes.

"oh, really?!" he stretched his arm to her side of the bed and took the phone. He unlocked it and she damned herself for not protecting it with a passcode. The first thing he saw was the conversation with Robin. He scrolled past the old messages and read some of them: _"__thanks for the wonderful time"_, _"__I wanna see you again, tomorrow?"_ and _"__we should do it again. Soon."_

"what the fuck does that mean, Regina?!" he exclaimed, trying to stay calm as much as he could.

"nothing." she ripped her phone from him with a courage she didn't think she had; a courage that only made him angrier: he grabbed her wrists and pushed them hard against the matress:  
"who's that man, Regina? Who's that... Robin?" he ordered her to answer and Regina swallowed hard.

"the new headmaster. We... we went out for launch a couple of times. But it's just the job, Victor, really!" he shot her up with a slap right in her face, succeded by one of her sighs.

"yeah, of course, the job! Who the fuck do you think I am?!" he climbed on top of her; she felt him against her stomach. _Hard. _That whole situation _aroused _him. How could he be such a pervert psychopath?

Her stomach hurt and she was nauseated at the only thought of _him_.

"you left him fuck you, didn't you?"

"No!" another slap. Regina squealed in pain: "I swear to you, Victor, he never touched me!"

"I don't believe you!" he shouted, pulling down her panties. Her head was spinning as she prayed: _oh no. Please no. Not again. Please._

For a second she thought that it was all just a dream, but when she felt his disgusting hand slipping into her panties, she realized it wasn't:  
"did he touch you like that?" Regina was cold as ice and dry as the desert, but he didn't care at all: he pushed two fingers in her anyway, making her arch her back in pain. "yeah, he did that too, didn't he?!"

"Victor, please, stop. Stop!" she screamed through the tears that were inevitably falling down her cheeks, reaching for the pillow, making it just as wet as her eyes. Victor was laughing crazily while he insulted her, while he treated her like a piece of trash.

Regina watched him getting harder and harder at every move he made and that made her cry even more, if that was possible.

_Please, please God, make him stop. Please, _she mentally prayed, closing her eyes.

"STOP CRYING!" she heard him shouting.

"p-please... stop..."

"stop? Is that what you told him? To stop? Oh no! You wanted more. A whore like you always wants more, and more, and more." he laughed as he took off his boxers. Regina coughed, then she sighed again. "I told you to stop crying!"

"I'm... I'm sorry. I can't."

Victor liked to beat her up, it turned him on crazily, but the tears and the sighs... they were definitely a turn off for him. Maybe something from the honorable man she had married was still left in him.

"stop crying, or I'll make you!" he repeated.

Regina didn't know what to do. She couldn't stop, not even if she tried to. So she prayed, she prayed unstoppably that whoever was up there, watching over her, could take her life right then. She just wanted to die, before she could live the millionth torture.

"damn it, Regina!" that scream of his was the last thing she heard before she felt his hands closing around her delicate neck. And they tightened more, and more, and more, until she couldn't catch her breath anymore. She choked, but at least she wasn't crying anymore. Victor smiled and tightened his grip even more, while he thrusted all of himself in her.

It hurt, it hurt like hell, everywhere, every part of her, inside and out. She was sure she was about to die, she could feel the life leave her, and maybe, a part of her was happy about that: no more sufferance, no more tears, no more Victor. No more Robin. Oh, Robin... in that exact moment she swore to herself that, if she was ever going to survive that night, she was going to call him, she was going to confess him everything, every single, nasty detail. She was even going to tell him about the feelings she had been hiding from him since the moment she first saw him. About how she fell in love with his smile, with his eyes, with his simple but still so delicate gestures. She was going to ask him to protect her, to hold her tight to himself, as she should have done before.

_It's too late._

Regina left go one last tear as she felt him emptying himself in her. Finally the grip around her neck started to loosen and she could breathe again, even though she still found it hard. She saw Victor's satisfied smile as she felt him slipping out of her body, as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

She felt him falling back to his side of the bed and she stood still, frozen, until she finally felt his regular breath: he had fallen asleep.

She cried every tear she hadn't cried before, every sigh she had to hold back, then she took her phone again and, this time, she composed Robin's phone number.

Five seconds, ten seconds, fifteen seconds.

It was 3 AM, he wasn't going to answer. There wasn't a chance. However...

"Regina! What the hell...?! it's 3 AM!" his voice. Oh, God, his voice. It felt like coming home after years. Jesus, she had missed it so much, she had missed _him _too much.

"I-I know, I'm sorry..." she tried to sound calm, while her voice couldn't do anything but tremble, still in shock "I-I..." _hung up the phone, Mills, you're being ridiculous. What you think you're doing? Victor is sleeping two inches away from you, he's gonna kill you this time. _"can you... can you come pick me up? At my place?"

"now?" he was confused as fuck, and sleepy, and probably angry, but his voice was still able to reassure her like nothing else in the world.

"yes please, it's important."

For a couple of seconds, she heard nothing coming from his side of the phone and she thought she had lost him for good. Then she heard him whispering:  
"sure. What's your address?"

Maybe, it was worth trying to live the life she dreamed of, rather than dying living the one she had.

* * *

When Robin arrived with his car, he found her sitting in her porch, waiting for him with her purse and a cigarette in her hand. When she saw him, she immediately ran to him, as if he was her salvation. _He was._

"I didn't know you smoked." he commented as she walked in, as if he had seen her not even an hour before. As if it was all natural.

"I don't. It was just... a one-time-thing, I guess?" she shrugged "thanks for coming." she throw the cigarette out of the window.

Robin stood still for a couple of seconds, just looking at her: she had a long wool scarf around her neck, even though it was a hot september night. Her eyes were red, full of tears, and her dark hair were completely messed up. Something was happening to that woman, something so serious that it pushed her to call him in the middle of the night.

"Regina... I'm not leaving until you tell me what's going on." he turned the car off and looked straight into her chocolate brown eyes.

"Robin..."

"No! I deserve an explanation. I mean, you call me at 3 AM, asking me to pick you up at your place while your husband is sleeping, like I am your dirty little secret. I come and I found you... like that!" she pointed at the complete mess that she actually was. "please, tell me what's going on."

Regina looked down and held back the millionth tear. He was right. She needed to tell him everything. He _deserved _to know everything.

"I'll tell you, but first we need to go far from here."

"Regina..."

"Robin." this time, she was the one to interrupt, burying her begging eyes right into his deep, blue ones: "please, _take me away._"


	4. Chapter 4

**guys, I'm so sorry this chapter took me so long, but the school has started again and... ugh. hope you like it. as always, excuse me for all the mistakes, english is not my first language and I don't have a beta (lookin for one!) so... yeah :) **

**enjoy!**

* * *

Robin drove for several miles, Regina didn't ask him once where they were going; she didn't care. It was, for sure, a place where Victor could never reach her and that was enough.

She didn't dare to look at Robin, not even for a moment. She was afraid to meet his eyes that, instead, were constantly searching for hers. Her head rested on her knuckles as she looked out of the window. Sometimes she searched for his reflection in the glass and stopped to admire his figure. Her guardian angel. The one who had finally taken her away from that monster.

She had been so brave to go away, God only knew how much, but without him, without _Robin,_ she surely wouldn've been able to do such.

She heard him turning off the car and she finally turned to face him:  
"where are we?" she murmured

"at the beach."

_What? _The nearest beach was... who knew how many miles away from her house! She smiled, spontaneously. God, how could that man always be so damn wonderful?

Regina got out of the car and, immediately, the salty air filled her lungs. She took off her shoes and let the sand tickling her feet, then she looked at Robin: he had just done the same.

"you wanna give me your scarf?" he asked, giving her a kind smile. That same smile she had missed more than anything, in the past days.

"no, I'm fine, thanks."

He nodded, without saying anything else; she was going to talk first, over time, when she would feel at ease. They walked by the sea without saying a word, until Robin, tired of the insufferable silence that had fell between the two of them, tried to make her laugh by dipping his feet in the water, shivering like a wet chick as it was cold.

"you're crazy, Locksley!" she found herself laughing, out of nowhere, at the sight of his already-wet-to-the-knee trousers. He rolled them up, joining Regina in her laughter:

"the water is... a bit cold." he commented. She laughed again.

God, she _was laughing._ After all she had been through in the past three years and, particularly, that night, she was laughing. How could that man make her feel so terribly good? She wanted to know.

"mh, really?" she dipped a foot in the water too and immediately pulled it out, shivering "yeah, well, let's just say that _a bit _is an euphemism."

She left herself fall on the sand, followed by Robin. He saw her shivering again and took off his leather jacket:

"here, take it."

"oh" she smiled tenderly "it's not necessary!"

"I insist, you're cold and..."  
"Robin, really, it's not..."

"you're shivering..."

"I said no!" she exclaimed, all of a sudden, making him jump on his seat.

"ok" he murmured, staring at the sand underneath his arse. _Damn it, Locksley. _He didn't say anything, he just stood still, hearing the long, deep breathe that she took:  
"I'm so sorry, I... I don't know what came over me, I just..." _yes, you know it_, the goddamn voice inside her head kept on repeating. Maybe this time, she had to listen to it.

"it's nothing." he replied, but she felt guilty anyway. The last thing she wanted was to hurt him after all he had done for her; after all he had started to _mean _for her.

They stood silent for a couple of minutes, minutes that looked like hours, then she took his hand, smiling sweetly. Like she had never smiled to anyone:

"I would love to lay down with you a little and tell you what happened." she said in a voice not at all insecure, determined and sweet at the same time. Robin returned her smile:  
"I would love to hear it."

He laid down first, stretched out an arm and invited her to lay down on it, so that he could hold her in a tender embrace. It took a while to Regina to get used to the contact between their bodies, but she didn't say anything. She didn't let him understand how much she was still suffering.

"are you comfortable?" he asked, making her smile even more.

"very much. Would you want to cover us with your jacket?" she looked like a child and Robin couldn't say no. He smiled at her lovingly and covered her body carefully, as if he was taking care of an actual baby, then he laid back next to her.

It was still dark, they were lighted only by the moon and the stars, but they didn't care; they still managed to look into each other's eyes.

"Victor and I... we discussed." _oh come on! Be honest for once. _"three years ago. We started discussing three years ago." she corrected herself and Robin gave her a puzzled look. "I haven't been completely honest with you the other day; since we found out that I can't have children, Victor hasn't treated me the same way. He used... strong words with me, as a start. Then, slowly, the violence became physical." she saw him widening his eyes and she couldn't tell if it was because he was angry or shocked, or confused. Maybe the three of them.

"he..."

"he started beating me up. First only on my arms, but then..." a tear ran down her cheek "even on my face. He said it was me who pushed him to do that, because I was an useless woman and he regretted marrying me." a sigh shook her and Robin wanted to hug her tight, but, right then, he noticed that something was keeping him from doing it: fear. Pure and simple. It was as if he had just found himself touching the most delicate crystal in the world, so fragile that even a touch could break it into a million pieces.

"I didn't say anything, ever, to anyone. I was so afraid that they wouldn't believe me, I... I don't know. Victor was so kind when there was someone else with us, maybe... maybe they wouldn't believe me. Not to mention how scared I was that he could kill me." she kept on talking but Robin noticed that she wasn't looking into his eyes anymore: she was looking down, concentrated on the way his dark-blue t-shirt collided with her white tank top, his abs against her breasts and, for a second, she felt naked in front of him.

"tonight he came so close." it was then that she finally removed the heavy woolen scarf from around her neck and threw it away, behind herself. It was dark, but he could perfectly notice the purple signs of Victor's strong hands as they had closed around her fragile neck.

"God..." yes, to Robin, that was the right moment to invoke God. What that woman had felt, every pain, it was as if he was feeling it on his own skin, all together. He wanted to touch those signs, as if he wanted to cure them with his fingertips, with his caresses. There, where there had been so much pain.

He didn't. He stood still, like paralyzed.

"don't... don't feel obliged to go on, if you don't want to."

"no, please! I want to. I want to tell you everything. I want you to know every part of me, even the darkest." saying this, she began to tell him everything that had happened that night. Every detail, every emotion, every gesture.

"I called you because I have no one else." she concluded, finally finding the courage to create a contact: she rested her delicate fingers on his face, brushing his beard, touching his skin where she had never done it.

"I'll kill him." she felt his teeth clenching against her hand and suddenly widened her big, brown eyes:

"no, please, Robin! Don't do that, don't leave me."

"Regina, that bastard deserves to pay! And I'm not talking about a couple of years in prison, I want to kill him, I want him to feel the same exact things he made _you _feel!"  
She had had that desire too, trying to deny it to herself and to Robin would've been stupid. But, in that moment, she didn't care about Victor; she felt as if, by saying everything to the handsome man right in front of her, she had erased him from her life. Once and for all. As if she had definitely closed that horrible chapter of her life and she was ready to start a new one. Not then, not in that moment, but she would. With that man.

She was sure of that.

"hold me. Hold me in your arms. This will hurt him more than anything else, trust me. Just... hold me." her eyes were buried in his blue ones and Robin couldn't help but notice the gleam of supplication that was inside of them. He nodded imperceptibly and gently wrapped his arms around her. He was so afraid to hurt her in some way... he absolutely didn't want to risk it, so he left her guiding him: he felt her making herself comfortable against his chest, burying her face in his abs, her ear so close to his heart she could feel it beating. Only then he finally managed to smile again: she was the most beautiful angel he had ever seen and, right then, she was in his arms.  
Regina was feeling so incredibly protected... nothing could scare her at that moment; she was in the arms of the only man she trusted in the whole world, she wouldn't be afraid anymore.

They stayed in that position for quite a long time, without saying a word. It seemed like they were sleeping but they both knew they weren't.

Robin was the first one to see the light of the sun, because Regina had her eyes closed and the head still buried in his chest, while his eyes were widely opened, aimed to develop god-only-knew what thought. His lips pressed against her forehead:  
"look." he whispered around 5 AM. It had been exactly an hour and three quarters, but to Regina it looked like five minutes since he had wrapped his arms around her.

He gently pulled away and sat up, followed by her who joined him moments later. They both looked at the sun rising on the other side of the street, in the hills. They smiled like curious children who were seeing the world for the first time, then Regina looked at him.

God, those eyes were so deep, Robin swore he could spend every second of his life buried deep into them.

"it's beautiful." she breathed, unable to help herself from staring at his lips. Damn, she wanted to kiss him; she wanted to kiss him right there, right then. She wanted him to hold her like he had done before, just with their lips finally joined. She wanted him to kiss her back, feel his body against hers, make love to him. There, on that beach. F_uck everything._

But, perhaps, it was too early. For both of them.

"yeah, definitely." Robin whispered and, for a second, Regina thought he was answering to the questions she had secretly made in her mind.

They remained there, staring at each other for a couple of seconds more, without having a single clue what to do. Both with a mad desire of kissing each other, both too damn scared to try.

"you want me to..." Robin began, definitely breaking that sort of spell they had created around themselves "you want me to drive you to the police?"

He saw her flinching for a moment, as if she had remembered of Victor only then.

"I... I don't think it's a good idea."

Robin wanted to protest, to tell her that it was the right thing to do, the first one to start a new life; then he realized that that woman had probably been told what to do for far too long, so he didn't say anything.

"ok. So... where do you want to go?" he smiled and she thought about it for a second, taking a bit of sand in her hands, playing with it like a baby.

"mmh... can't we just stay here? Say... forever?" she looked at his with those sparkling brown eyes of hers, to which she knew he couldn't resist, and made him laugh:

"oh, of course milady. We can stay here all the time you want, but I don't think we'll be alone for much longer..." he pointed to an old man with a dog who had started to walk along the shore. Regina rolled her eyes and sighed:  
"I don't understand what they're doing here at five in the morning." yes, she definitely looked like a child.

Robin laughed heartily: "that's probably the same thing they think of us." he said, brushing her nose with his index finger, just to see her curling it and laughing again. My God, he just wanted to see her like that for the rest of his life.

He wanted to kiss her but he didn't tell her. None of them said anything, until she took his hand and interlocked her fingers with his:  
"I want to go to the police and report Victor." she said serious, without looking into his eyes. Instead, she looked at their joined hands.

"it's a really brave gesture, Regina, I really admire you for-"

"at one simple condition." she buried her eyes into his and smiled sweetly: "you will stay next to me."

He returned her smile and brought the hand she had joined with his on her face, gently, making sure she understood, on every instant, that all he wanted to do was to love her. With every gesture.

"you don't even have to ask, Regina, of course I'll be with you. As long as you want me to." she felt his thumb drawing circles all over her cheek and smiled at the sweetness he was treating her with. It was all she had asked for, all she wanted.

"thank you, Robin. For everything. And excuse me if I called you at 2 AM, if I... kept you up all night, I-"

"hey, ssh... you're an extremely brave and strong woman, Regina Mills. The least I could do was staying next to you." he brought his face close to her and Regina gasped at the sudden proximity. She _felt_ his lips so close to hers, she wanted them, they were drawing her.

She couldn't help but feel a bit of disappointed as he kissed her forehead. As if she was... a simple friend.

* * *

They left the police station only at two in the afternoon. The agents had made sure they had every picture of the marks around Regina's neck, they had collected her deposition and assured her that Victor was going to be arrested by the end of the day.  
Regina had cried when she'd heard that last sentence, but she couldn't tell if it was sadness or relief. Maybe one part of her, a small one, still wanted good things for Victor. But that man... he wasn't Victor anymore. He wasn't the man she had married; instead there was a monster that she could hardly recognize.

Robin noticed how silent she had been for the whole time and got worried; he smiled and took her hand, caressing it gently, circumscribing circles on its back:

"hey..." he whispered, looking at her for an instant, distracting from the road.

"hey." she returned his smile, but there wasn't anything similar to the ones she had made him the morning before on the beach. That smile didn't reach her brown eyes.

"are you okay?"

"no." she admitted, biting her lower lip. She felt so incredibly safe that she wanted to open herself up with that man; he had always been there for her when she needed someone. He had been the only one.

"you want to... talk about it?" he clenched both of his hands on the steering wheel, as if he wanted to keep himself from stopping the car and hugging her tight.

"perhaps in front of a sandwich, I'm starving." a slight smile curved her lips.

"of course. My treat. Where do you want to go?"

"no, I... I want to be alone." she shrugged sweetly but he misunderstood: she saw his face darkening and she immediately put her hand back on his "with you. I want to be alone _with you._" she blushed like a tomato as she realized what she had just said. "I-I mean..."

"don't worry. I understand." despite the fact that his heart was beating wildly in his chest, Robin managed to smile like nothing had happened. That phrase had struck him, had deceived him for a long instant, he could not deny it. "but if we go at my place, I won't ever let you eat a sandwich. You deserve so much better, Regina Mills. What about... spaghetti bolognese?"

Regina smiled and unconsciously licked her lips at the thought. When would she stop looking like a baby? He smiled.

"oh, it looks great, but I don't want to bother you... you've already done so much for me, I-"

"but I didn't say I'll do it all by myself! You're gonna help me. I intend to make homemade pasta, miss Mills."

She laughed without any control, letting herself go for a second, then she realized that he was serious:

"oh my god! And what if I refuse? Are you going to fire me, chief?"

"no. I say worst: I'll leave you starving."

* * *

Before arriving to his house, they went to the supermarket to buy the ingredients for a good launch. Regina smiled serene while she pushed the shopping cart next to Robin, who was choosing a good wine. They joked everytime they could, they smiled to each other and he couldn't help but appreciate how truly beautiful that woman was. Everytime she looked away, his eyes wandered down her body and he smiled. He smiled because she was perfect, in every single detail. He smiled because, in spite of all the horrible things she had been through, she managed to smile. In spite of _everything_, that angel managed to smile.

When they arrived home, Robin made her put all the things they'd bought on the kitchen table and they started to unpack the ingredients.

"where do you keep the containers? I would like to start preparing the mixture for the dough."

"right there." he pointed to the lower part of his huge belief and watched as she bent to take what she needed. He bit his lower lip so hard he almost made it bleed. _Goddamn it, you have to stop._ Those tight, dark jeans Regina was wearing, highlighted her butt perfectly and were seriously testing Robin's self-control. He had to mentally slap himself a couple of times and repeat in his mind that she wasn't the kind of woman he could spend up to two nights and then give her up with a futile excuse -not that he was used to that sort of thing, but still. That woman deserved so much more, she deserved someone who could take care of her, always. Someone who was going to be there for her no matter what, someone who didn't think of her as if she was a sex-toy. She deserved to be loved and he... he couldn't be the man she needed. He was _just a close friend._

"perfect. So, how many eggs do I start breaking?" for the millionth time that day, she looked like a baby and Robin couldn't help but smile. He pulled out of the box the exact number of eggs she needed to prepare the dough, then he started to prepare the bolognese sauce. While they were busy with their jobs, the only noise they could hear were the ones of the spoons colliding with pots; until Regina, tired of that silence, started to sing.

"_I don't know where you're going but do you got a room for one more troubled soul?_" Robin heard her and giggled softly, careful not to be seen. He absolutely didn't want her to stop, he had never seen her like that, completely carefree. She was there, handling the dough, rolling it into flour from time to time, while she sang a song that he thought was from the _Fall Out Boys. _Yeah, he had heard it once before on the radio! It was certainly _Alone Together. _

"_say yeah!" _she exclaimed, raising one hand in the air, as if she was at a concert. Robin's giggle became slightly more audible but she still didn't notice "_and let's be alone together! We can stay young forever. Scream it from the top of your lungs, lu-lungs, say yeah!_" again, she raised her hand, but thim time it was covered with flour, so she dropped a bit over her head, in her hair. This time, Robin literally burst into a laughter and Regina realized she was laughing too only when she turned to look at him:  
"it's been a while since I felt this way. It's been ages since I sang!" she said happily, the widest of smiles on her face "_this is the road to ruin, and we're startin' at the end!" _she took a bit of flour in her hand and threw it at him with nonchalance, ignoring the guilt that came over her as soon as his dark blue shirt started to turn to white. He opened his mouth, pretending to be angry, then she dipped his hand in the flour and started tickling her, covering her tank top and most of her arms with white.

They started laughing like idiots, chasing each other, running all over the kitchen. Regina threw a piece of dough to him but he promptly picked it up and threw it back at her, hitting her on the shoulder. She tried to catch his hands and he seemed to surrender, except that he was planning to reverse the situation. And that's what he did: in less than a second, Regina found herself trapped between the cold marble of the kitchen and Robin's warm body.

"Miss Mills, I can't accept this behavior, you know that, right? You disrespected your chief..." his voice was involuntarily deep and it managed to penetrate in Regina's mind easily, driving her completely crazy. _Oh, God._

"mmh, really?" she pretended not to understand, tilting her head on the side.

"yeah. I'll have to take measures..." he wanted to keep on joking, but Robin couldn't help himself from noticing the bruises on her neck that that bastard had left. They had faded away at least a bit, but they still had to hurt, judging by the purple color that they still had.

She saw his face darkening and immediately dropped her smile:  
"stop it." she said serious, looking down for a brief moment.

"w-what?"

"I don't want you to look at me like that anymore. As if I was sick or God only knows what else. Robin, stop. I don't want to be pitied anymore." she threw the cloth on the table and walked away, leaving him there alone, speechless. Like an idiot.


	5. Chapter 5

**hello everyone! this is it. as always, I'm so sorry for all the mistakes and also thank you for all the follows/reviews/favs, they mean a lot :) enjoy this chapter! xx**

* * *

They stayed in silence during all the lunch. But it wasn't the cheerful silence he was getting used to, the kind of one he could turn to look at her and find her smiling; it was a heavy silence, which neither of them knew how to end. He dropped his fork on the plate in a thud, then looked at her and took a deep breath, decided to start a serious conversation:

"I've never looked at you that way, ever, and I never will. What I have for you is a huge sense of admiration, Regina. Everything you've been through, everything that son of a bitch has made to you… well, I'm not sure I would be able to get through it, If I were you. I hear everyday on the news of women who kill themselves because they're tired of the way their husbands treat them; or husbands who kill their wives because it's tuesday or because their favorite show is not on when they want to watch it. You're an incredibly strong person. A woman who, in a morning, has taught me more things than life has done in forty years. You, Regina Mills, needed a hero, so that's what you became. Your own hero. And everytime I look at those damn scars on your skin, I make sure that I remember that. That I remember who's standing right in front of me. And I shudder." he had his blue eyes buried deep in hers as he pronounced those words and Regina couldn't help but let a tear ran down her cheek. That man was simply amazing, he was all she had ever wanted from life. And yes, she was sorry for snapping at him as if he was a little boy, but she was also tired of having every single good moment of her life ruined by Victor's memories.  
Even when that monster wasn't there, he was still able to ruin her life. She was simply tired.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you." she murmured, biting the inside of her cheek. There she was, the innocent little girl that Robin loved to see. He gave her the sweetest of smiles as he put a hand on hers:  
"it's okay. You made a delicious pasta, I can forgive you."

He saw her smiling again after what seemed to have been a lifetime.

* * *

After they had lunch and washed the dishes together -Robin washed and Regina put them back in the cupboard- like a real couple, Robin invited her to sit next to him on the couch and turned on the tv. There was nothing particularly interesting on at that time of the afternoon and he knew that, but he decided to take a look anyway.

"oh, yes this! let's watch this, this show is fantastic, the main character is such a badass!" Regina exclaimed as she read _Major Crimes _among the infos of the program. She suddenly realized how terribly rude she had been to interrupt his activity and she immediately blushed: "I mean… If you don't intend to watch something else…"

He shook his head with the most beautiful smile she had ever seen and handed her the remote control.

Regina wasn't used to that. Usually, the tv was one of Victor's exclusivities, since he stayed in front of it twelve hours a day. She hadn't watched her favorite programs in three years and, when she tried to sit next to him and kindly asked him to watch something they both liked, he literally kicked her off the couch, forcing her to stand up.

She shook her head to what was now just a bad memory and settled next to Robin, who, in the meantime, had taken a huge fleece blanket.

He laid down on the couch -as Victor used to do- but, unlike him, he opened his arms and invited her to lay next to him. Regina considered the whole situation: the couch wasn't that big, they would have ended up on each other in less than a few seconds, she would have ended up falling asleep with the head on his chest and everything would have been so… relaxing? pleasing? Awkwardly amazing.

Fuck that, she didn't care anymore. After all, they had been in that position until dawn that morning.  
"are you comfortable? do you need another blanket?"

"No, I'm fine, thanks." and it was true, she was better than ever in his arms. They watched tv for a couple of minutes, until their eyes started to become heavy. Neither of them had slept that night, they deserved a bit of rest. It was just… Regina realized just then that they were about to sleep together for the very first time. Okay, maybe it wasn't like she had imagined it, but it was still a start.

"thank you Robin." she whispered closing her eyes, snuggling against his chest. "for everything."

"ssh, don't ever say that again." and he kissed her temple, but she was already fast asleep to notice.

* * *

They were awakened a few hours later from the ring of Regina's phone. He was the first to get up and turn off the tv. He smiled at the sight he had right in front of his eyes: a beautiful, _very _beautiful woman peacefully sleeping in his arms. Right then, he wished that moment could last forever, for the eternity. He wanted to spend the eternity with Regina Mills.

"hey, sleeping beauty" he whispered, shaking her a little, sweetly. He wanted her to have a peaceful and serene awakening, for the first time in so long.

"mh" she moaned, stretching her legs. Robin smiled for the millionth time: she truly was the most beautiful and sweetest thing he had ever had the honor to see. "what's wrong? is it morning yet?"

"no, milady, it's not. And I'd also like to remind you that I'm your chief and I'll be forced to fire you if you'll take another day off, Miss Mills." he giggled softly; a sound that Regina heard directly in her ear, feeling a shiver run down her whole body.

"mmh, and I'd like to remind _you,_ chief, that you took the day off too today." almost unconsciously, she hugged him tighter, completely ignoring the telephone that was still ringing.

"hey! it wasn't my fault and… I can! I'm the boss!" they laughed again, together, then Regina finally opened her wonderful brown eyes. They found themselves enchanted in a long, intense look that seemed to last forever. They were so close, their lips almost touching but they didn't notice, they were so concentrated in each other… they were about to…

"the phone." he whispered, shaking his head. Regina couldn't help but feel a little disappointed: maybe he didn't want to kiss her? It had to be the reason why he kept on finding every excuse when they were that close. Maybe he found her horrible.

_No one could ever find you attractive. _Victor's voice resounded in her head like a sick melody and she barely managed to hold back a tear.

"yeah… right." she immediately got up, interrupting whichever contact with him as quickly as she could. Robin wanted to say something, or maybe just damn himself for what he had just done, for being such an idiot; he opened his mouth but nothing came out.

He patiently waited for Regina to finish her conversation, observing the way she nervously bit her lower lip as she held the phone tight in her hands, making her knuckles as white as pearls:  
"thank you so much." she concluded and hung up.

She brought her eyes back to Robin and gave him a half smile:  
"they… they took Victor away. He's in prison. It's over." her smile grew wider as she saw Robin reacting immediately; he jumped off the couch and wrapped his arms tightly around her in a tender but still passionate embrace.

"it's over, I did it!"

"yes, you're the strongest person I know, Regina." a tear ran down both of their faces but Robin managed to wipe it away before she could notice it.

"I never thought I'd be able to…"

"but still, you did it. You know why? because you're a warrior." it was time for him to wipe away _her _tears, and so he did; his thumb caressed every inch of her cheeks, from her eyes to her jaw, then he placed a kiss on her temple. It was their gesture, the thing able to make them feel closer and satisfied, almost like a kiss.

"thank you Robin, thank you again."

"ssh, come here." he pulled her in another embrace, but this time she allowed herself to cry on his chest, silently, without even realizing.

"they told me that I can come back home whenever I please, so, if it's not a problem for you…"  
"we'll leave whenever you desire. Just say a word and I'll jump on my car." he smiled, but he truly meant every word. They stayed like that for a while, then Robin started to rock her sweetly, as if they were dancing with no music playing. A sweet melody.

"I'm proud of you." and that surprised Regina Mills like a few other things in her life managed to do. Never, not even her parents, had ever told her something like that.

But that man she had known for so little, who she already knew she couldn't leave without; he had just done it. He had said that as if it was necessary for her to know. And he truly meant that, she could tell that by the tone of his voice.

She asked him if it was a problem for him to go immediately but he shook his head gently. They got in his car, both with a huge smile printed on their faces as he turned on the radio.

For the firs time in forever, she wanted to listen to happy music again:  
"yesss! this one, this one!" she exclaimed happily, throwing her hands in the air: _"my ex man brought his new girlfriend she's like oh my god! I'm just gonna shake; and to the fella over there with the hella good hair" _she looked at Robin, making sure he was lookig at her too "_won't you come on over baby?" _ she was acting playfully at first but suddenly her tone and her look turned sexy; as sexy as she had never felt before "_we can shake, shake, shake." _ and she concluded with a wink as the chorus exploded one more time.  
Robin felt a sudden need of taking a long, deep breath of fresh air as he realized he was blushing uncontrollably. My God, that woman; even when she was playing, she managed to tease him, as if it all came naturally to her, to be that desirable. As if she was born to do that.

_My God. _

He pushed his foot on the accelerator, hoping that, that way, they would take less to arrive. He just needed to stop wanting her for a couple of seconds; stop desiring her body, the scent of her hair invading his nostrils, the smoothness of her skin under his fingertips and her mouth… God, her mouth.

_Christ, mate, get a grip!_

He parked in front of her house and gave her a smile as he watched her getting off his car, after she had thanked him for the millionth time. She walked to the door with her bag in her hand and her eyes stuck on the ground, until he saw her pulling the keys out of her purse.

Robin bit his tongue, looking straight in front of him, on the road.

He had to let her go, at least for then. She had to come back to her world, she had to start over and, with him by her side, she wouldn't be able to walk alone. He needed to stay away from her for a couple of days, then… then he had no idea.  
She needed space, she needed _time._ Of course she couldn't jump in another relationship after an abusive one; but he was going to wait, he was more than sure about that. He was going to wait for that woman all the time she needed.

He brought his eyes back on her, this time with a sincere and more serene smile. A smile that dropped immediately as he saw her falling on her knees, in front of the open door, in tears.

"what the hell…" he jumped off his car and ran to her as quickly as he could: "Regina!"

"I can't. I can't do that, Robin…" he joined her on his knees, wrapping his arms around her body one more time, holding her tight against his chest.  
"he's still here, he's everywhere, he's inside my head… I can't do that!"

"ssh, ssh, it's okay now, I'm here."

"I don't want to stay here, I don't want to live in this house anymore, please. Wherever I look… he's there." she was so fragile, he was even scared to touch her. But still, he want to cuddle her, caress her face until every single tear turned into a beautiful smile. He needed her to smile again, to laugh, to sing as she was doing before in his car.

"I have an idea, wanna hear it?" he smiled and she nodded "but before, you have to wipe away those tears, okay? as your chief, I'm ordering you to get rid of them." he tried to make her laugh and, fortunately, he manage to make her smile, at least.

Regina couldn't help but thank God one more time for that amazing angel she had by her side. Without him she would have been completely lost.

She quickly dried her tears but he, obviously, didn't let her do it all by herself: with the sleeve of his shirt he completed the job, then he smiled:  
"why don't you take some of your things and you stay at my house for a bit?"

Regina's heart started to beat crazily in her chest, as if she had suddenly started to run:  
"Robin, I…"

"in the meantime you could sell this house and, when you'll have the money, you'll buy a new one and then you'll leave. No hurry, really. It's not a problem." he wanted to hide that, but his heart was racing too, hoping with every inch of its being that she could simply say yes.

"I don't want to give you any kind of problem with your job, too…"  
"you won't. we won't tell anyone and, if they see us together, we'll just tell them the truth. Regina, we have nothing to hide; what we do is perfectly legal and we're not hurting anyone."

Again, she rested her head on his abs, inhaling his scent. Yeah, maybe it was the right thing to do, maybe it was really the perfect way to start over again: sell the house that had always been a prison for her, tortures included.  
She would have lived with Robin for a bit. As friends, obviously. And when she'd have found a buyer for her house, she would have left. Simple as that, it could work. It was totally innocent.

They were going to be _just friends._

_"okay."_

* * *

**and yes, I'm going to make you ache for a kiss!  
Thanks for reading and please please please REVIEW! **


	6. Chapter 6

**hey guys! happy valentine's day! :)**

**first of all I want to thank you all for the wonderful reviews that you leave me every time: thank you, thank you, thank you! they really warm my heart. I also truly appreciate all the follows and favs and, most of all, your patience in reading my story because I understand that my english isn't perfect, as it's not my first language, so yep. I'm still glad you guys enjoy it, so thank you.**

**sorry if this chapter is a bit shorter than the others, but I'm really trying _not _to give everything away too soon.  
enjoy!**

* * *

"please, can you go in and grab my things? I… I can't." she murmured embarrassed, finding herself staring at the floor one more time. They were still there, in front of that house that had always terrorized her, the door was opened and none of them had the courage to get in.

"Regina, I've never been in your house, I wouldn't even know where to look for your stuff, so… why don't you take a leap of courage and try to come in? You've been through a lot, you can do this too." he whispered sweetly, caressing her arm up and down, slowly.

"I-I…" she shook her head slightly.

"I'll come with you. I'll be right by your side, I promise, I won't let anything bad happen to you." he took her chin between two of his fingers and lifted her head up, so that he could bury his ocean blue eyes in her coffee dark ones. He could read fear in them, pure and simple; strong enough to make him shudder, but he was careful not to show any emotion.

Regina nodded, even if he knew perfectly how still uncertain she actually was. She closed her hands around his arm tightly and, together, they moved their first steps into her house.

The couch, where Victor used to sleep and eat all day in front of the tv, was a complete disaster: drinks all over the floor, crumbs everywhere; the kitchen was exactly the way she had left it the morning before -a complete chaos- on the right, the door of the bathroom, where she had cried most of her tears, where she had had most of her downfalls, was opened. And over there, there it was the bedroom. Where it _all _had happened.

Without realizing, she tightened the grip around his arm, while numerous shivers ran down her whole body. She couldn't do that, she couldn't revive it. Not even after twenty-four hours, she wasn't strong enough.

"hey… I'm here." he whispered as if he had read in her mind. He pressed his forehead against hers for a moment, as if he wanted to give her more assurance, as if he wanted to make her understand once more that he was there to protect her.

They walked into the bedroom and Regina couldn't help but stop at staring at the bed: it was in the same exact conditions in which, the night before, Victor had left it. The pillow in which she had suffocated her sighs, the dirty sheets… they were still there, and so was he. In her head, he was still there. She felt as if he was going to appear behind her back to take her and throw her on that bed once again, to abuse her body while he insulted and beat her up for talking to Robin, for going to the police and sending him to jail, for ruining his whole life in a couple of hours.

_Stupid bitch, I'll kill you._

"Robin" she called him as she felt his arms leaving her.

"yes?"

"please, hold me." she was about to burst into tears again and, in that moment, she reminded him of that hurt and frightened angel that he had seen the night before, when she had begged him to take her away from that nightmare. Without hesitating, he closed his arms around her again in a warm embrace from which Regina would never part.

"I know it's hard, but you have to think that soon all of this will be over. For good. Tomorrow I'll call a realtor to take care of this house and sell it as quickly as they could. I won't let you revive all the horrible things that maniac has made you feel anymore." Robin was using a calm tone, but the anger in his voice was palpable. He would have done everything just to punch that son of a bitch until he bled; even though he perfectly knew that it wasn't going to be enough. Not even killing him would have been enough. Nothing could ever erase the horrible things he had made to Regina. To _his _Regina.

She nodded, shaking those light dark curls he was so damn in love with, the curls he was going to find, since that day, every time he woke up, every morning, every night.

"where can I find a suitcase to put your stuff in?" he asked, giving her one of his sweetest smiles. Regina indicated some point under the bed and he nodded. She also told him where he could find all of her money, so he took them, as she asked. He wanted to take Victor's too but Regina refused at first, she didn't want anything from him, let alone his money; but then Robin explained that she didn't have to use it for her, but to get rid of that house once and for all, of the memory of him forever. And there she agreed.

She guided him in every movement, told him which drawers to open to find her clothes -she absolutely refused to touch anything, she was terrified- and which ones he had to take, her shoes, her… underwear.

"m-maybe you should…"

"Robin, we're friends. And I'm sure you know what a woman normally wears under her clothes." she couldn't help but smile at her own joke, despite the tragedy of the whole situation.

He nodded, although Regina could say he was quite embarrassed as he opened the drawer and found himself in front of dozens of bras and panties. Regina thought, in all honesty, that it was going to be less awkward, but she was wrong: he suggested him to take everything, to make it easier for both.

"here it is, the essential. I'll send someone tomorrow morning to take the rest of your stuff."

"thank you so much, Robin." she smiled "oh wait! my folder!" Robin looked under the table she was pointing to and saw the folder she was used to bring with her everyday at work. "there are some tests I still have to check. I had to do it for today, but…" she smiled shyly, shrugging, realizing that it was the very first time she talked about her job to someone actually interested in listening to her.

"you didn't, Miss Mills?" he giggled, joking.

"is it my boss asking or my friend Robin?" they laughed together, then he took the folder as she asked and handed it to her. Now they really had everything. They were ready to start a new chapter: together.

* * *

"I emptied some drawers for your clothes." he told her as he walked out of the bedroom. Regina was waiting for him in his living room: being alone in a bedroom with him once in a day was enough.  
"thank you, Robin. Thank you so much."

"hey, I don't want you to thank me anymore, okay?" he took her face in his big, warm hands, making her smile and blush like an idiot.

"okay." she nodded imperceptibly. They smiled to each other one last time, then he left her to get into the kitchen:  
"so, what do you want for dinner?" he asked but she wasn't listening. She had walked into the bedroom to arrange her stuff in the drawers Robin had given her but she stood still in front of the room, too concentrated in something she shouldn't even have looked at: the bed. She touched the blankets slightly, with the tip of her fingers, while her mind got lost in a thousand thoughts.

She closed her eyes and breathed his scent in. It was everywhere, so good, so sweet, so different from Victor's; it filled her soul, it penetrated her senses. She wanted more, God, she wanted to roll herself in that bed with him, get lost with him in that magic. Body against body, skin against skin, lips against lips.

It was there that Regina Mills realized that she wanted Robin Locksley. She wanted him for real, she truly meant every word; but she didn't want just physical pleasure, she wanted to make love to him. Make love again after so long -if she had _ever_ actually made love to someone.

She wanted to feel him close to her, against her, _inside _of her.

"are you alright?" his voice arrived to her like a slight whisper, but it had still been able to surprise her.

She turned to face him and smiled:  
"yes, I was just… making myself at home." she couldn't help but blush, as if Robin had literally seen the scenario that she had created in her mind not even a second before.

"you know, I was thinking" he whispered, walking closer and closer to her, with a beautiful smile on his lips. Regina swallowed hard and felt her stomach turning upside down, but it wasn't unpleasant. In fact, she felt the butterflies. _Shit. _They were together, in a bedroom, alone. Once again. And he was so close, so goddamn close…

"w-what?"

"I don't want to cook so…" he took a lock of her hair and rolled it around two of his fingers. Regina's heart started to pound in her chest; _oh my…_ "maybe we could go out." the distance between their lips was definitely too short, both of their eyes were stuck on each other's mouth and they couldn't stop dreaming. They couldn't stop _hoping. _

"yes, we could."

They closed their eyes, both so sure they were about to taste the most desired kiss of their lives, the most wanted, the most passionate. But they were, once again, wrong: Robin's phone started to ring and they parted almost immediately, as if someone had woken them up from a wonderful dream.

_Damn it. _For a moment, Robin thought he had said it out loud, then he understood -thanks god- he hadn't.

He ran into the living room, leaving her there, speechless, without an explanation. She was tired of that situation; it was just like being one step away from the sky, almost about to touch it, then falling from the high, right on the ground.

"sorry, it was Amanda." his assistant, of course. "she just wanted to know if I'm going to work tomorrow." the smile he had on his lips was shy, almost embarrassed. It wasn't the bright and bold smirk he usually had, maybe it was for the millionth failed kiss.

"and you are?" she asked, bringing her eyes back into his.

"absolutely. And you're coming with me."

That reaction took her in surprise; an ordinary man would have proposed her to take some time to rest, especially after all she had been through, but not him. He, despite the extreme sense of protection he felt for that woman, didn't. She asked herself why but he anticipated her thoughts:

"Regina, today you told me that you don't want to be treated as a victim anymore. You're right, and that's exactly what I'm going to do; you have to get out, to go to work, to live your life as you think it's best for you. Because, starting from today, you'll start living again, Regina Mills, I promise." again that proud and bright smile that, this time, Regina promptly returned.

Oh, that man was anything but ordinary.

* * *

They had gone out for dinner, but it had been nothing like the classy and romantic dinners that you see in the movies; absolutely. Regina had worn a pair of ripped skinny jeans and one of Robin's sweatshirt -she had practically stolen it from his closet and, when Robin noticed, he laughed his soul out- that was literally twice her size. She looked much younger than her age, if he didn't know any better he'd have said that she was no more than twenty-five. She was glowing. The thought of going out for dinner with him amused her. It didn't excite her, it didn't make her heart beat like a teenager's going out on her first date; it _amused _her.

And so it happened: they found themselves eating Buffalo chicken wings in a remote mexican restaurant. They were laughing like idiots, drinking the cheapest beer in the whole country; they had their hands dipped in sauces and they played like children, stealing each other's food from their plates. Everyone else in the restaurant was glaring at them but they didn't care; they only saw each other.

"my god, it was the coolest night of my life! I can't believe I'm actually 37, really!" she exclaimed as they arrived back home. She was so drunk she didn't even realize how actually happy she was to come back _home _with someone she trusted. With someone she _loved_.

"yeah, but now we have to sleep, it's late… we have to work tomorrow." when he said so, with his already half closed eyes and a sleepy voice, he didn't notice the way Regina had wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close.  
"mmh, really? do we… _have _to work, chief?"

"absolutely." his hands unconsciously started to wander all over her back, but as the real gentleman that he truly was, he didn't go too far. He perfectly knew his limits, even when he was half drunk. God, he was really too much…

"I'm not sleepy, daddy." she whispered in his ear before kissing his neck and letting herself go, resting her head on his shoulder. His skin burned at the contact with her lips, as it was the very first time; cause yes, he was used to kiss her temple, her cheek, her nose, but she had never, ever kissed him. A shiver ran through his whole body, from the top of his head to his feet, making him feel so alive, so good. Despite the fact that he was trying really hard not to respond, his body couldn't help but react to the contacts and, within seconds, Regina realized that she was feeling _him_ against her.

"Regina…"

"take me to bed." she whispered kissing his earlobe, then she trapped it between her teeth and bit it, then sucked, then bit it again, until what she was feeling against her became completely hard. _Shit, shit, shit. _He heard her giggling and he thought he was about to get crazy; he kept on telling himself that Regina didn't really want that, that she was drunk and she was loosing control and he shouldn't have.

"please" she moaned "take me to bed."

And take her to bed he did; he lifted her up in his arms as if she was his bride, making her laugh, even if that wasn't exactly what she was hoping for. He walked her into his bedroom and, when he put her down on the mattress and started to tuck her in, she stopped him:

"Robin, I can't sleep in these clothes! I smell like fried chicken." she smiled, but it wasn't a playful smile. She arched one of her perfect eyebrows as she saw him blushing:

"I-I…"

"undress me." she whispered, making his stomach vibrate "please."

"Regina, I can't."

"you can. You _want _to. Please, do it."

He couldn't leave her like that, he couldn't and perhaps a huge part of him didn't want to. He took the ends of the sweatshirt and slowly started to take it off, savoring every moment, every inch he discovered. Underneath she had -fortunately or unfortunately, he couldn't decide- a white tank top, not too transparent, that hinted the color of her bra.

From one side, he was happy that he wasn't going to see her half naked that night: he wanted to keep that sensation for when it was all true, wanted by both, for real.

He removed her shoes and socks, then he took a deep breath and stared at her jeans. God, he really didn't want to do that. He started to unzip them slowly, feeling his cheeks burning more and more each second as he pulled them down until the only thing that covered her were her panties. He was hoping with every inch of his being that they weren't transparent and, luckily for both, they weren't; they were dark, just like the dark of that room, just like Regina's eyes.

"are you alright?" he whispered, as if he had remembered only then who was laying right under his body. She smiled and nodded, even though she couldn't stop hoping for him to continue the way _she _wanted.  
He didn't, but she was expecting it.

"come on, get under the blankets Miss Mills." he said happily. She obeyed but, as she felt the warmth of his body slowly leaving her, she closed her fingers around his arm:  
"please, stay. I want to sleep in your arms one more time." she would have never, _ever,_ said that if she was sober, she wouldn't have had the courage and he knew that well enough. But the fact that she was drunk didn't make it less true, so he smiled. He didn't say anything, he simply got under the blankets next to her and pulled his body against him, wrapping his arms around her chest in a soft, warm, protective hug.  
And there they fell asleep, with the sincerest smile printed on their lips.

* * *

**please please please REVIEW!**

**xx ella**


	7. Chapter 7

**happy belated easter everyone! Sorry I'm incredibly late with this one (also 50SOF, I haven't forgotten about it, I sent the chapter to my beta and she's currently correcting all of my terrible mistakes!) but I was really busy and I couldn't find time to finish it. It's not beta read because I truly wanted to post it today, so all the mistakes are mine. enjoy and... sorry for the angsts?**

* * *

Robin was the one to wake up first. He was used to get up at dawn, without even needing an alarm clock. The first thing he found before his eyes was Regina's beautiful face, just a few inches away from his; so close that he could feel her breathing against his lips. He smiled spontaneously, secretly wishing to find that marvel in front of him every morning of his life. He wanted to caress her face, kiss her temple and breathe a "good morning" in her ear; but, of course, he didn't. He didn't want to wake her up, he would never want to: she was so beautiful, sleeping in his arms once more, like an angel.

Slowly and reluctantly he got up from the bed, careful not to disturb her in any way. He suddenly realized that he still had the clothes from the night before on, that he smelled like fried chicken and that he could still taste the cheap beer they had been drinking the whole night. Thanks god, at least his head was not aching.

He smiled at the memory of the night before and blushed at the way it ended: _"take me to bed"_ the way she had pronounced those words, the way she had practically purred into his ear. He remembered perfectly the way his body had immediately reacted to the sound of her voice, and how he had wanted with every inch of his being to take her right there, in the middle of his living room. He had to shook his head and bit his tongue to remember how fragile the broken-hearted angel that was in front of him actually was.  
He was hoping with all that he was that she hadn't _felt _his reaction; or, at least, that she didn't remember it.

He walked to the kitchen, with the intention of preparing her breakfast. She surely needed some strong coffee, and, of course, something sweet. She would surely enjoy something sweet.

He smiled when he realized he was cooking for her for the very first time and, as he sliced the bread for the french toasts, he started humming. He was happy. For the first time in forever, Robin Locksley was happy too.

"_isn't she lovely? isn't she wonderful? isn't she precious?_" he whistled and his blue eyes sparkled at the perfect way that song fitted Regina Mills.

He put the food in the plates and arranged them on a tray, then he poured the coffee in his huge mug -he didn't mind the thought of having her lips where he'd just placed his- and covered it with a small cloud of cream. He couldn't help but giggle as he tried to imagine her drinking it, getting her nose tip first, then her whole face covered in cream. His heart was beating so fast, he simply couldn't wait to spend every moment with her; to watch her finally opening her brown pools and smiling at him just like the night before.

He carefully placed the tray on the bedside table next to her, letting the french toasts and maple syrup's fragrance invade her nostrils. He took the mug and, with a huge smile on his face, started moving it in circles underneath her nose. He tried not to burst into a helpless laughter as she unconsciously started making the worst faces he had ever seen in her sleep.

Her mouth was slightly opened, Robin could catch a glimpse of her tongue, heavily abandoned on her lower teeth. He saw her lips closing and there it was: her tongue gently caressed her lower lip, wetting it repeatedly. She was an actual marvel: the perfect mixture of sweetness and sensuality that had always characterized her.

He giggled, then he brought the mug near her nose, until the cream touched its tip, dirtying it. There they were, those eyes.

"mmh" she gently stretched herself "what's this scent?"

There it was, that sweetness.

He smiled, his eyes didn't dare to leave her face: he wasn't going to miss a single move she was making.

"I cooked you breakfast" he wouldn't even dream of telling her about the cream on her nose, she was going to find out herself, if ever.

"you cooked me breakfast?! oh Robin, really, that wasn't necessary!"

"oh but I wanted to. _And _I was looking for a kind way to tell you that you own me a pair of new shoes." she gave him a puzzled look, taking a slice of buttered bread "yeah, well, last night you threw up on mine. they were my favorites!" he watched as the strongest shade of red painted her cheeks immediately, making them warmer every second more.

_Oh shit, she couldn't believe it! She was a disaster!_

"r-really? I'm— I'm so sorry I thought… I thought I was able to control myself, I just—" she couldn't remember a single thing from the night before. At least, not since they walked out of the restaurant together. She was trying, she was trying really hard to revoke the memories into her mind but… she didn't even know how she got there. _Oh my…_ she was in his bed, wearing just her panties and an almost transparent white tank top. They… they _did not…_

"don't worry. I was kidding." he burst into a laughter, making her freeze on her seat. "you… you don't remember anything?"

"not since we walked out of the restaurant." she admitted, the pace of her heart slowing down slightly. Despite she was relieved for his shoes, the thought of having sex with him and not remembering it was torturing her. No, it wasn't fair, it wasn't supposed to happen that way. She didn't want their first time to be like that.

"allow me to remind you, then." he leaned towards her, as closer as he needed to make her feel the warmth of his body. They were almost touching, and so were their lips. So damn close once again. She saw him smiling and stretching his arm to reach the tray, then he took a french toast and put it between his teeth.

Regina's heart was beating incredibly fast, she felt dizzy, her heart was spinning and she didn't even remember her name. _How is this even possible._

"we went back home and you… practically fainted in my arms. So I took you to bed."

_please take me to bed, Robin._ he couldn't help but bit his lip cause, _damn_ that voice.

"and that's… it?" her eyes still widely opened, her muscles completely tensed.

"well yes. Why? isn't that enough for you, Miss Mills?" he giggled

"no, no, I mean, yes! Of course yes!" he leaned back and she finally relaxed. She tried not to catch a breath of relief cause that would've been far too obvious, but God, she really got worried. Okay, maybe she was a bit disappointed by herself for being that stupid and getting drunk like a reckless teenage girl, but she was happy she didn't make anything she would regret the morning after.

"y-you… you undressed me." she looked down, between the white sheets she had slept between the whole night, the sheets she had caressed the night before while imagining them twisting and turning while he was inside of her, cherishing her, _loving _her.

Her face was still in flames.

"why yes, I had to. you smelled like fried chicken." he laughed, trying to play down the situation: the embarrassment was tangible, and Regina was grateful for the way he always offered her an escape.

He wasn't going to tell her they slept together, it was going to stay a secret between the two of them and those sheets. And his fantasies, his dreams —they were going to stay secret too.

He watched her as she finally smiled and sipped her coffee. She took a bit of cream on her index finger and licked it sweetly, without any mischief. She was simply being her beautiful self.

However, Robin couldn't help but notice how that gesture made him wish for some things he shouldn't wish for. Not with a fragile woman like her, not with a so delicate one.

"I'm gonna take a shower." he said, clearing his throat, trying with everything that he was to stop himself from thinking about Regina Mills' mouth closing around her own finger.

"what time is it?"

"half past six. I'll be quick, so you can take one too." _or maybe we could do it together; _he had to bit his tongue to stop himself from saying it out loud. The atmosphere was already delicate, another provocation and he would have exploded.

She nodded, taking another slice of buttered bread and mentally thanking whoever was watching over her for sending such an angel by her side.

* * *

It was when Regina walked out of that bathroom that Robin realized how much he craved for that woman. It wasn't just physical attraction, not even the simple desire of protecting her from the world: he wanted to caress that skin, every last inch of it. He wanted to look at her while the purest of pleasures invaded her eyes, he wanted to give her so much more than words could say.

He craved for Regina Mills, in everything that she was.

She was wearing a tight long skirt that caressed her curves and barely touched her knees. The rest of her legs was bare, exposed to his eyes, just like he remembered he had seen her the night before, when he had taken her jeans of of her.

Her skirt was pink, the first three buttons were opened and that forced him to bury his teeth in his lip one more time. The inevitable four inch heels that she wore the whole day- and he still couldn't understand how- were black, just like her long lashes.

The woman he had before his eyes was nothing like the girl who had dinner with him the night before; the one who drank cheap beer and ate fried chicken covered with sauces. He enjoyed these two sides of her, the thought that she could be his forbidden desire and the girl next door that he loved so much at the same time.

Because Robin Locksley _loved _Regina Mills and it wasn't a secret.

"is there something wrong?" she asked, feeling his eyes all over her. She blushed slightly.

"no, I'm sorry, It's just… You're… You're beautiful."

Her cheeks got even more red as a shy smiled colored her face.

"you're quite charming too." she giggled. He loved the way she always managed to bring up a laugh in a tensed situation that, inevitably, happened between them.

"why, thank you, Miss Mills." he smiled too, then he took her jacket: "come on, I don't want to be late because of you." he joked holding the jacket up her shoulders, offering to help her wearing it. Regina couldn't help but blush again as she lifted her arms like a lil baby getting dressed by her daddy. She felt Robin's hands slowly sliding down from her shoulders to her wrists; they were warm and she closed her eyes, wishing to feel them all over her body. She bit her lip, ashamed by her own mind: he was being so sweet and kind with her and all she could think about was getting in his pants.

"ready?" his voice arrived like a whisper straight to her ear that made her weak at the knees. She closed her eyes and bit her lower lip harder. _God, if he only imagined what he did to her…_

"y-yes." she struggled against her own self not to moan.

"then let's go. I'll be waiting for you in the car." as soon as his hands left her arms she felt lost, completely. No, it couldn't be possible, she couldn't be so damn addicted to someone, she couldn't let herself suffer for a man again. There was nothing, apart from a beautiful friendship, between them and probably there was never gonna be since he kept on finding every possible excuse to run away from her when they were about to kiss. He had every right to live his life, find a woman who loved him truly and that _he _could love without feeling the need of being a paternal figure too.

He reached for him in the car and fastened her seatbelt. She tried to smile for the whole ride, but she didn't say a single word: she didn't want him to believe there was something wrong, but there was, and he was so damn good at pulling the words out of her mouth, it was inevitable for her to speak at some point. He knew her, his Regina wasn't that silent; at all. He removed his right hand from the wheel and slowly, discretely put it on her leg, making sure he was touching the fabric of her skirt and not her bare skin. He found her hand without even watching and made their fingers entangle. She turned to finally meet his blue eyes and he smiled:  
"is something wrong?" he asked.

"yeah. I was just wondering when I will be able to drive my car again." she tried to convince herself that _that_ was the reason she was being sad and silent the whole time, but it wasn't. There was something more. Something she was going to hide until she was forced to reveal it: "the idea of driving again scares me, Robin. I don't understand why…" but he could: that monster had stolen everything from her, had deprived her of her control, of her freedom. Everything she made, it reminded her of him, of the life she had been living until then. Probably, in that car she could still smell his perfume and feel his presence… that son of a bitch was still able to torture her, even when he wasn't there.

"This too shall pass, Regina. It doesn't matter how, I will buy you a new car if it's necessary, but, Regina Mills, you'll drive again. And sooner or later, Victor will be just a nightmare. You will live your life again, I promise." it was supposed to be just a thought so he was quite surprised when he heard himself saying it out loud. But he also saw the way his words made her finally smile, it was all that mattered.

"I don't think you need to buy me a new car, Robin, but if you insist… I quite fancy the latest model of Audi." she giggled playing with his fingers.

"mmh singular tastes I'd say, Miss Mills." he joked.

"exactly." they smile to each other one last time, then he concentrated on the road in front of him. Regina felt his hand slowly slipping away from hers as he placed it back on the wheel. She looked down and nervously bit her lip: how could she miss him in a simple gesture?

When he stopped the car in front of the school, at the parking reserved for the headmaster, her face darkened again: "do— uhm… do you want me to go first?" she asked in low whisper "or you, yeah, you should probably go first, I'll wait like… say five minutes before—"

"what the hell are you talking about?" he raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"I'm just saying that we shouldn't be seen together." for a second, her eyes got lost in nowhere, then she brought them back into his blue pools: "I don't want to get you in trouble."

"I thought we've already talked about this, haven't we?" his tone was sweet but severe at the same time. He didn't want to talk about that anymore, he didn't want her to think she was a problem for him. Everything he was doing was born out of… of _love._

"I-I…"

"Regina, I don't care what everyone thinks. Between us there's just.. a beautiful, wonderful, simple friendship. If they want to believe us or not, I don't care." she looked at him, she saw the way his fingers clenched around the steering wheel as he pronounced the word _"friendship"_, at the kind of shadow that darkened his eyes. She smiled, god only knew why.

"so let's go, Locksley, you don't want us to be late!"

* * *

The morning passed by incredibly quickly and she realized only when the bell rang for the lunch break that she had been smiling the whole time. She had never been so serene, neither she had wanted to come back home that much. God, that man had turned her life upside down and changed it in the best of ways.

She looked at the watch on her wrist and realized it was almost midday. She had promised herself she was going to thank Robin for everything that he'd done for her by offering him lunch and, unfortunately, the school canteen was the only choice possible right then.

"Ms. Mills" she heard somebody calling her name and she froze on her feet. _No. Not him again. _When she turned around, she found his figure standing right in front of her: Mc Kluskey, with that smug smile and that face she would have been more than happy to slap all day, with no mercy. _Breathe._

"I don't have time now…" her voice was shaking as she cursed herself for being so weak. _It's just a boy, Regina. Just a stupid boy._

_"_oh, yep. I know. You have to blow the headmaster off before the next period, right?" she heard him laughing and her brown pools filled with tears. If he thought that, then everyone else for sure thought the same. _God,_ she had put both of them in trouble, she knew it. She had known it from the beginning.

"how dare you?"

"oh please, I saw the way you two look at one another. He devours you with his eyes at every chance he gets. You let him fuck you, don't you? Is that what you have to do to work here?" _you let him fuck you, don't you?_ The same exact words Victor told her the night he—

She slapped him, hard, making the boy step back a few inches. Tears were now running free down her cheeks.

"don't you dare talking to me like that anymore, or I'll—"

"what? You'll tell Mr. Locksley? Yeah sure, maybe while you still have his cock in your mouth, while his voice is hoarse from moaning your name and calling you his little whore" another slap, this time on the other cheek. Her eyes filled even more with rage, sadness, desire of screaming.

She heard him laughing, his cheeks were burning, red as blood, but he didn't care: he was _laughing._

"come on, tell Mr. Locksley. I can't wait for him to know what everyone in here thinks of him." Regina raised a hand to hit him one more time, but he grabbed her wrist and pulled her hand near his mouth. He spread his lips and licked her index finger, so slowly, while Regina struggled to free herself. Sighs were exploding in the room, _her _sighs, while he kept on laughing, he laughed at her and enjoyed every tear she cried, every suffocated scream. _Shit, she couldn't let a student do this to her…_

_"_mmh… so sweet, so naive." he moaned, closing his eyes to enjoy her taste better. "you could be the perfect whore for me but, you know, I'm very possessive. I like having the sole right." with a last sigh, Regina managed to free herself. Inside her head, there wasn't Mc Kluskey anymore, but Victor. Victor insulting her, Victor taking her dignity away and, slowly, even her life. Victor walking towards her, Victor abusing her—

She ran away. She shouldn't have, she shouldn't have been so damn weak, she shouldn't… but she didn't care, she just wanted to be alone and cry her soul out, until she'd had enough.

She reached the women's toilet, where she was sure no man could reach her; they scared her, every man scared and disgusted her. Every man. Except…

She exploded in a long sigh as the thought of Robin reached her mind. She wanted nothing but being in his arms, and maybe she would by now, if that idiot hadn't interrupted her plans.

She wasn't like that before. Everytime she walked into a class, everyone froze, everyone bow their heads. But that was before… _him._ She should have had the balls to drag Mc Kluskey to Robin's office and let him do his job. It was the right thing to do. But what should she've told him? "this idiot thinks that I work here only because i'm your personal whore"? or maybe "I shouldn't live at your place anymore because everyone here thinks that I'm a slut"? She was expecting something like that, she knew that school too well not to know how everyone in there reasoned. And, even though Robin didn't care, she couldn't ignore them. Not after everything else she had been through.  
She felt the phone vibrating in her jacket's pocket and squeezed her eyes shut. She prayed that whoever was calling her was going to stop immediately, because tears were still rolling down her cheeks and she still couldn't control her sighs. But no, whoever it was, they weren't going to give up that easily, so she tried to fix herself at her best and picked the phone, even just to look at the name on the screen: "Robin". Her heart started beating fast in her chest and, for a second, she really thought he was her guardian angel. He was always there when she needed him, even when she just _thought _of wanting him by her side, there he was. A strange chill ran through her whole body and then a slight smile curved her lips:  
"hello?" she tried not to let her voice sound as broken as it actually was.

"Regina! I'd been looking for you everywhere. I bought some very good lasagne at the school canteen. You know, not the best, but still, everything I managed to get. Just tell me where you are and, if you want, we'll eat them together, I—"

"Robin" she interrupted him. The smile on her lips grew wider cause, God, they've had the very same idea: they both wanted to see each other for lunch, be with each other, _smile_ to each other again. Maybe he had missed having her around like she did. She bit her lip, cursing herself for even thinking of something so stupid. "I'll reach you. In your office?" while she talked, she wiped the tears from her face, checked her make up to make sure she didn't look a complete disaster.

"Regina?"  
"yes?"

"are you okay?"

She bit her lip hard, holding back the millionth tear. It was crazy the way he could still manage to read her soul, even when he wasn't there. _Damn._

_"_yes! of course I am, it's just… I'm at the toilet and—"

"oh, ok, ok, got it." she heard him laughing and she could almost imagine the slight blush on her cheeks.

"I'm coming."

"I'm waiting." and there it was. That warm smile and that deep voice she was madly in love with. God, she loved him, she was completely, utterly in love with him.

She put the phone back in her pocket and washed her face, then let the cold water wetting her wrists, her hands. She looked at herself in the mirror and got surprised by the way she had been able to substitute the shining of the tears with the purest of joys in her eyes; the joy of finally seeing him again, the only reason she was still alive.

She smiled at that thought, a brief smile that made him realize what she, deep down, already knew; she was in love. Hopelessly in love with Robin Locksley. What now? Was she going to tell him? Her heart beat crazily every time he was with him, as if it was pushing her to tell him everything she felt and more; but her head— the thing that had always prevailed on her heart, in every decision she made- her head was telling her to give up, that he deserved better, a woman he could build a family with, a woman with no troubles, without a past that will always haunt her. He deserved the best and that wasn't her.

* * *

She walked into his office with her hair completely, inevitably messed up; it always happened, when she was late, that some of her dark curls fell on her face while she ran to be on time, but this time she truly cared about her look. She didn't want him to see her like that, but it was too late: she was in front of him, feeling naked,_ completely_ naked under his blue, warm, welcoming blue pools that were looking straight to her soul, hoping that she could somehow understand how much he wanted her.

He cleared his throat and forced himself to take his eyes away from the marvel that she was: "hi" he smiled shyly.

"hi" she simply replied with a different sparkle in her eyes. She wasn't just happy to see him again, it was something more. She was relieved, as if she had just came home after a long, exhausting and horrible trip.

She brought her eyes to the table and found it perfectly arranged, as always since two weeks, for the two of them. He had even learned her tastes in wines and everytime made sure there was her favorite one.

_Everything for her_, that was his mantra.

They took a seat, one in front of the other and, for a long minute, silence was all that filled the room. None of them knew how to start a conversation, even though they both wanted to say a million things.

"how was your morning?" a simple, direct question. And he truly wanted to know. He wanted to know everything that was going on in that crazy head covered in dark curls. Every thought, every moment, he wanted to be a part of her life.

Regina flinched for a second, choosing carefully every word she was going to use: "long. exhausting. My stomach didn't stop grumbling for a moment." she tried to smile as her mouth closed around the fork again to taste the lasagna.

Okay, that was the truth! of course, not _all _the truth —not even closely, but at least she wasn't lying to him.

"I would have brought you something if you'd called me." he said, as if she had just insulted him.

"Jesus, Robin, there's no need! I'm perfectly capable of going down to the canteen and buy myself a donut if I'm hungry, I'm not a baby anymore." she rolled her eyes, under his blue, watching ones. He couldn't help but smile and reply with a simple:  
"yes, you are."

She shut her mouth, immediately. The way he had said that, the way his eyes were sparkling— _God, what was he trying to do? How dare him making her feel all those butterflies in her stomach? How dare him making her want something that, for the past three years, she had been terribly afraid of?_

_"_no, I'm not." she smiled, but her cheeks were already burning red. God knew how much she was dying from licking her upper lip and biting it nervously; but she managed to hold herself back.

"are you contradicting your chief?" this time _he_ was the one to bite his tongue, leaning closer to her, until their faces were just a few inches away from one other.

"what if I am?" their faces. So damn close once more, so damn eager to touch, to savor one another. This time, none of them was going to be able to control themselves, she was sure of it. And yes, maybe _right then_ he wanted to kiss her, but it was wrong. She knew how goddamn wrong it was. They were playing with fire, pretending everything around them was worthless, but it was, _a lot._

She couldn't let herself fall for a one-time-thing, not after all she had been through, not after spending her whole life without a simple glimpse of love. She didn't even know what it felt like to be loved by someone… she couldn't open her heart up to the first man she met, not even if she loved him to death, not even if she couldn't even sleep without dreaming of him. It wasn't the same for him —it just couldn't be.

"to be honest, I've… I've had a shit day." she breathed out. She saw Robin's eyes dilating, clearly taken by surprise; from the quick change of topic, from what she had just revealed him.

"what happened?"  
"I-I—" she looked down. Maybe she shouldn't have, maybe she should have stopped suffocating him with her problems and hire a good psychologist. Maybe Robin didn't even care, maybe he was just trying to be nice—

"I keep seeing him everywhere. My job can keep my thoughts away but just for a little bit. The truth is… he took away my strength. The students can't even recognize me as their teacher and respect me anymore…"

"hey hey, hold on" he raised his hand, inviting her to stop talking for a second "first of all, that shit has not taken anything away from you, Regina, cause, since I met you, you did nothing but show me what a badass warrior queen you are." he smiled sweetly and watched her doing the same, looking down again, blushing slightly. He didn't even notice her embarrassment anymore, it was so damn unique of her, he had learned to love it. Just like the rest of her.

"also, and I want you to be completely honest, if someone's bothering you I want to know." he tried to keep on a calm tone, as if he was afraid of showing him how vulnerable he was when somebody touched the thing he _loved _the most.

Regina didn't reply, she just looked down. This time, however, she wasn't smiling; her face just as grey as the plate she was staring at to avoid his blue eyes.

"Christ, Regina! Who?"

"Mc Kluskey." she finally confessed, splitting herself in two parts: one tried to convince the other she had made the right thing; the other kept on repeating her how much of an idiot she'd been because she had just put herself in the millionth trouble.

"God…" she brought both of his hands on his mouth, as if he wanted to stop himself from shouting against god knew who. "what did he do to you?"

"t-to be honest it's… it's not the first time."

"what?"

"two weeks ago he… he called me a whore and… touched my butt." she kept on looking down and she was sure she had never been so red in her face. Right when Robin was about to say something, she continued: "today he… he did it again. He asked me to be his… his… woman" she just couldn't say it, not in front of him. But it wasn't necessary: he knew her well enough. "I pushed him away and I told him I was going to tell you everything" she fleshed her brown eyes at him for a second, but what she read in them frightened her. Rage. Pure and simple rage burning flames in those sparkling blue skies, a rage she had never seen before, not even when she'd told him about Victor. She couldn't tell if part of that rage was for her, but she continued anyway: "he laughed at me and told me" _a deep breath, come on, you're doing great _"he told me that of course you would believe me since we… sleep together." she made sure she had chosen the right words and, at each of them, she blushed, more and more. She was about to cry again, and both of them knew that.

"I slapped him and he called me a whore again. I slapped him once more and he… he grabbed my wrist and…" while she told him about the way Mc Kluskey's disgusting tongue -that reminded her of Victor's- had slipped on her skin, without leaving her a say in the matter, she started crying.  
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you, Robin, I swear, I just… I didn't know what to do, I was so weak!" she was there, crying on his chair, armless. A breath of wind would have been able to destroy her right then. His heart, his soul; both filled with a thousand of different, contrasting emotions. From one side he wanted to take her in his arms and protect her from the world; from another, he wanted to run out of that office, go find Mc Kluskey and beat him up, punch him so hard until his face bled. And maybe, while he did that, he would have thought of Victor, and of how much he wanted to do the same to him too.

He jumped off his chair, making Regina freeze right where she was, frightening her. He pressed both of his fists against the wall and took a long, deep breath, abandoning his eyelids heavily on his eyes.

He had to calm down.

He couldn't fuck up his whole career for a stupid, imbecile horny teenager; it just wasn't worth it. But God, the way he had treated her, the way he had _dared _to touch her…

"Jesus, Regina! You should have told me! You should have told me, I would have suspended him!" Regina let go a sigh, because the thought of him being angry at her had been confirmed and it was killing her.

"I'm so sorry Robin—"

"send me Mc Kluskey" he said lifting the telephone receiver without even listening to her.

She could almost imagine the old good Amanda dragging her head full of red curls in Mc Kluskey's class and tell him that the headmaster wanted to see him. And he wouldn't have been surprised, of course, it's all he was waiting for.

"I'm sorry Robin" he tried to repeat, but Robin simply nodded:  
"I know. Now please, leave."

"w-what?"

"I don't want him to find you here. Leave."

With eyes full of tears and too many words left to say, she left that office. She ran to the toilet again and this time she threw up everything she had eaten; then she allowed herself to sit on the floor and cry, helplessly.

She had lost him.

**thoughts? **


	8. Chapter 8

**hey everyone! I was supposed to update this yesterday but I fell asleep on my laptop -yep. I know. I'm terrible.  
But hey! here it is! hope you like it and, as always, sorry for all the mistakes. Enjoy!**

* * *

She had taken a taxi and came back home, alone. She hadn't had the chance to speak to Robin again after the fight in his office, she didn't even know if he had fixed everything up of if he was just trying to avoid her; all she knew was that she had fucked up. Completely. She had probably made the worst mistake of her life.

When she arrived home, she didn't find him and she was glad: it was going be far easier for her to leave that house without even giving him an explanation. Because yes, Regina Mills wanted to go back at her place. It didn't matter how hard it was for her to revive everything, it didn't matter how much she hated every inch of that house… she simply couldn't look into those blue eyes that she knew she had let down once more.

And yes, probably _he _had let _her _down a bit too. Maybe all she had wanted was for him to wrap those strong arms around her and tell her everything was going to be fine, that that asshole was going to be forced to leave the school once and for all… but he hadn't, he hadn't done any of this. He had just jumped off his chair and invited her to leave. And that look in his eyes— God, that look could have killed her if it had lasted a couple of seconds more.

She shook her head, trying to push away that thought for as long as she possibly could. She ran in her bedroom and took her bags from the closet. She hand't spent a week in that house and she already wanted to leave. She _had_ to leave, it didn't matter what she actually wanted. She rushed to put all of her clothes back in her bags and it was when she struggled close them that she realized she was crying again. God, she was a total disaster.

She heard the door opening and closing a second after and her heart lost a beat: he was back. She had to face him; she had to get lost in those blue eyes one last time. She would have to fight with everything that he was to firmly walk past him and leave that house anyway, despite his begs, the words he could possibly say. She had made her decision, and she wasn't going to change her mind.

"Regina? Are you home?" she closed her eyes and took a deep breathe: he was looking for her. Judging by his voice he was worried, almost terrorized. She heard his footsteps everywhere, in every room. _He's looking for you. He cares about you. _

"I'm here" she breathed out, squeezing her eyes shut. She heard him running straight where her voice was leading him, in her bedroom.

"Christ, Regina! I've been looking for you everywhere! Didn't you see my calls? I was worried!" _he wasn't angry._ She saw the way his eyes fell on the bag full of her clothes that she hadn't manage to close and this time it was _his _heart to lost a beat.

"what are you doing?" it wasn't a real question, more like a whisper to himself.

"I—I'm leaving. I've been here for a day and all I did was giving you extra problems. Today I made you risk your reputation… I have to leave. It's the right choice, for everyone." he stood frozen for a second, looking at her walking past him like he was transparent to her eyes. For a second, her scent was all he was able to _feel._ It was invading him completely, driving him out of his mind, he couldn't think straight anymore.  
He grabbed her arm, with delicacy, making sure not to scare her, or hurt her in any way:  
"please, don't." _no,_ he couldn't have said that for real. For the first time _he _was begging her to stay. _He_ was the one to need her and_ he _wanted her close to him.

"why?" her voice was a simple and weak whisper but Robin managed to hear it loud and clear.

"I don't care about my reputation at all; I could fuck it up in a second, for you. I would fight with McKluskey, if you asked me, with _anyone _to protect you. I would do everything I did today again, just for you, Regina." he wasn't thinking. He just felt his lips —so damn close to her neck, to her smooth skin that he was dying to taste— moving uncontrollably and pronouncing words straight from his heart, that he couldn't even find time to process. He wasn't thinking, it was his heart to take full control of his being. For the first time in forever, his heart was prevailing over his brain.

He saw her parting her lips and closing her eyes little by little at every inch she gained closer to his face.

"why?" she whispered one more time, her heart literally racing in her chest.

"because I…" his fingers closed around her arm —those warm, calloused finger that she wanted to feel everywhere. His palms against her skin and his lips —_God, those lips._

_He wasn't thinking._ She wanted her, she wanted _her_, every part of her —those lips. _He wasn't thinking. _"because I care about you."

Then she understand: after all he had said to her, after all the important words he had used… It was the right moment to confess his feelings for her, to give her that kiss they had postponed for so long. But if it didn't happen and wasn't happening there was a reason: it wasn't meant to be. He wasn't ready and maybe she wasn't too; maybe she didn't even love him. It was simple, intense affection for a man who had literally saved her life, more than once.

It was there that she smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tight:  
"I'm so sorry" she cried on his shoulder, and him, after hesitating a second —probably half confused and half disappointed one more time by himself— ran his hands down her back, then up, then down again, as if he was trying to calm her down. She had to cry, to let everything out, then he could give her the good news; then he could tell her that McKluskey wasn't going to be a problem anymore, that he had been expelled and she wasn't gonna see him anymore. The only thing he wasn't going to tell her was that he was about to punch his face until his nose bled —because he was capable to kill for her.

But she… wasn't ready to hear about his feelings. Maybe she was never gonna be. If it hadn't happened and wasn't happening there was a reason: it wasn't meant to be. Maybe he didn't even love her. It was simple, intense affection for a woman he had literally saved, more than once.

It was there that Robin closed his eyes, breathed her in, and swore to himself that he was never, ever gonna look at Regina Mills with different eyes, or think about her like she was something more than a friend. They were going to live together, to share special moments like the one they were living right then, but he was never going to think again that those moments could become something else.  
It was a promise he made to himself, from the heart.

* * *

The next two months passed by so quickly they looked like days. Regina had learned to smile again, to work with serenity, with joy. Every day she took a step forward; she was now able to sleep alone, without the need of feeling Robin's arms wrapped tightly around her. She even managed to spend some nights alone in the house: she put on some music and wandered around the kitchen, preparing something Robin would enjoy at his return. She had really made some enormous progresses, and he was proud.

Robin… well, Robin was the first thing she saw every morning, when she jumped off her bed and walked around, looking for chocolate. He had stopped bringing her breakfast in bed — "you have to take that nice ass of yours out of this bed and start doing something, Mills! I can't treat you like a queen forever!" he had joked, making her laugh till shiny tears were running down her cheeks— but he made sure everyday that she ate before running to work. It was important for him.

"good evening, handsome!" she greeted him wearing her pink pajama, hair tied in two adorable little pigtails and a huge bowl of popcorns. It was Friday night, he was late, but it was their movie night, the moment they both looked forward for the entire week.

"mmh, hello your majesty! you look… _elegant!_" he joked, stealing a handful of popcorns as he hanged his coat behind the door.

"shut up! it's my favorite pajama and I wore it for you!" she giggled.

"oh, I love it. With those little pink pigs, though, it's adorable!" they laughed together.

"so, what movie did you choose this time?" he ran in his bedroom to change himself, but she still could hear him from there. Regina smiled:  
"_A Night at The Museum_"

"oh, yep, I heard about it… it's so cool apparently."

He disappeared completely, but this time he closed the door, leaving Regina behind him, with a smile printed on her lips. She put the disc in the dvd player and sat back on the couch, with the bowl of popcorns between her legs.  
She waited for Robin to get out —wearing soft flannel grey pants and a white, almost transparent, tank top. She involuntarily bit her bottom lip, making him smile:  
"ready?"

For a moment, Regina lost herself; _the movie! He's talking about the movie, Mills, obviously._

"of course! come on, come here and hug me, Locksley!" she made room for him to sit next to her and so he did, opening his welcoming arms, inviting her to get in between them. She laid there, on his warm chest, between his legs, wrapped in a tight, loving, _friendly _hug. It was the moment they've both been looking forward the entire week, the one they loved the most; but none of them had the courage to admit it, not even to themselves.

Regina was feeling protected, safe from everything and, as she closed her eyes and rested her head on his shoulder, listening to his heartbeat, cradled by his breathing, she was sure that the world could end right there and she wouldn't care, she would've been fine with it.

He heard her laughing a couple of times during the movie, and he laughed too, not for the scenes, of course, but for her: for her face curled in the most beautiful, sincerest of smiles, and that laugh that made her look like a child…

They ended up stealing popcorns to each other, completely ignoring the rest of the movie. It was always like that between them; every time they ended up dedicating to one another and talking for hours.

"and then he told me I was beautiful and gave me a flower!" she smiled, playing with a popcorn "the guys of the first year are really cute. Of course, just a few of them. I remember I had a crush on my teacher during my first year."

"oh, what a lucky man!"  
"yeah. You know, to be honest, I was pretty ugly in high school; I was chubby and I wore glasses and my hair was super curly like… nothing like the straight one I have now! God, it was terrible!" she laughed nervously, blushing at what she had just confessed to her _best friend._

"I'm sure you were beautiful! I would've totally date you."

"you?!" she burst into a loud laughter "my God, Robin! this is just bullshit! I bet you were the typical football player every girl had a crush on! You would've never _ever_ date me."

"actually I sucked at every sport, except athletics. I had the abs, baby!" he winked at her, making her laugh hysterically "but yes, I must admit I was a really nice guy. I've had… a lot of girls." he smiled bitterly "but I would've been a complete idiot if I would've let go a marvel like you." he was telling the truth, it wasn't just a random sentence to impress her. He was always honest when he talked to her. The sparkle he had in his eyes could lighten the whole room, and that smile, those lips just as red as Regina's cheeks—

"oh, come on, Locksley! that's just not true." she punched his shoulder, making him smile again. Maybe he should have insisted on how really, truly beautiful that woman was; but he had sworn to himself that they had to maintain their relationship as a wonderful friendship, and that he shouldn't have thought about her differently… but he couldn't. Fighting against everything that he was was just useless; that woman was under his skin.

"You're right, I was an idiot. I'd have probably preferred one of that cheerleader girls, mostly whores, stupid and empty to a beautiful -inside and out-, smart, lovely girl like you. Back then, I didn't care. I had needs, I had moods and I satisfied each of them. I used those girls, slept with them once, maybe twice but that was it. I was an idiot, Mills, believe me, you're lucky you haven't met me." she saw the way his face darkened and she felt the need to say something. Something to make him feel better, to help him understand what an amazing, extraordinary man he was.

She put a hand on his cheek, caressing his beard, then smiled:  
"any woman would be lucky to meet you now, though. And you may have made mistakes but, believe me, it doesn't matter. I just have to look into your eyes to see what wonderful man you've become." she saw him smiling, finally, and returned his smile, spontaneously.

God, if only they could see themselves from the outside they would have understood how the sparks flew between them, as they could start a fire just by looking into each other's eyes.

"then I think I shall take advantage of it, since someone still asks me out."

"what?"

"Daniels. She asked me out to dinner next friday. To be honest, I think I did, but I'm not sure. It all happened by chance; she walked into my office and… I think I started flirting with her." he bit his lower lip, suppressing another smile, while Regina felt something inside of herself slowly dying. "I only found out when she left that we have been speaking for more than an hour." while he kept talking, Regina's eyes wandered everywhere trying to escape his. No, God, no, it couldn't be. No. _No. She wasn't jealous. _Christ, she couldn't be! She had made herself a promise, goddammit!

Irene Daniels was the literature teacher at school and, right then, Regina wanted nothing but an excuse to hate her, find even the littlest flaw in her, but the truth was that she was really nice; inside and out. Her olive skin, her green eyes, her full lips, her dark curls… she was stunning. She always brought her coffee during her break and she was always so kind with everyone. She didn't have any reason to be angry at her, or to hate her, it didn't matter how hard she was trying.

"so, what you say? Do you think it's a good idea?"

She reluctantly looked at him into his eyes: the last thing she wanted was for him to suspect she was jealous. Because _she wasn't. At all. _

"are you even asking?" she forced a smile "of course it is, Locksley! She's probably the only woman crazy enough to ask you out!" she joked, making him laugh. This time it was his turn to punch her shoulder playfully, as Regina forced the millionth laugh. God, she couldn't believe she was literally pushing the man she loved in the arms of another woman…

"yeah, I guess you're right." she saw him biting his lip. For a moment, she thought she'd have died to hear his thoughts, to know how he felt when he was with her, when he wrapped his arms around her, and when he was with Daniels. She'd have given everything to read in his heart.

"I was thinking about taking her at the new hotel-restaurant they opened on the beach."

"oh… _hotel_-restaurant?! You've quite high expectations, sir!" she tried to keep her playful tone, bu she was really, really dying inside. The sole thought of him holding another woman in his arms, kissing her and making love to her was eating her alive. _But she wasn't jealous. _The sole thought of another woman tasting those lips she had wanted more than anything else for more than three months was torturing her. _But she wasn't jealous._ The sole thought of another woman loving and cherishing his body, passing her fingers through the skin she had wanted to feel under hers, kissing him and feeling him inside of her was killing her. _But she wasn't jealous. At all. _

"I really just want to try to let myself go. Finally, for once."

She nodded. With a strength she didn't believe she had anymore, she faked a yawn, then another: "oh gosh, I'm really tired." she kissed his cheek, then she smiled "I wish you all the best, Locksley. You deserve it." and she meant it, every word.


	9. Chapter 9

**you guys have no idea how sorry I am for being this late with the update. school is finally over and I just have to translate the next chapters so I'll definitely post the next one sooner. also, as always, sorry for all the mistakes, english it's not my first language!**

**I absolutely can't wait for you to read this one so... enjoy!**

* * *

She had watched him go, perfectly dressed in suit and tie, as if he was going to his own marriage. He was going to meet another woman, a woman who wasn't Regina. He had smiled at her, asked if she needed something or if she preferred for him to stay. It was one of their Friday nights, after all… but she had said no, that everything was fine and she hoped he had fun. She had smiled, a little mischievously, so that he could understand once more that she meant every word, that she truly wished him all the best in the world, and if that meant spending the night with his new…_ flame,_ it was fine with her.

But it was not. She knew that it was not.

He had closed the door behind him and then, only then, she allowed that fake smile to drop from her lips, substituting it with her hands on her face, to cover her eyes, her mouth. Every muscle in her body was trembling, her chocolate brown pools were in flames and her head was throbbing. She didn't understand why, why she had been such a fool, an idiot, for allowing herself to believe just for a moment that he was hers.

_You let him go. _She forced her mind to remember the vow she had made to herself: _You have to let him go, live his life. He deserves the best and it's not you._

She had cried; at first it all started with a couple of tears, then she exploded in a thousand sighs. She throw herself on the couch, exhausted, opened up two beers and made some popcorns. It was supposed to be their night. One of their nights. She put on Dirty Dancing on dvd and spent _their_ very special Friday night alone, like a common Friday night. She started to cry during the very last scene of the movie, and she couldn't tell if that was for the characters or because of her stupid, pathetic situation. She cracked another beer but she didn't finish it: she needed something stronger.

Robin had a minibar for wines and other liquors, so she took a bottle of whiskey and added some ice to her glass. She threw back one, two, three, four drinks, until all she could do was laugh at herself, at her life, at her feelings.

She fell asleep on the couch, carefree. She couldn't hear Robin coming back; it was almost 2 AM and he was still dressed as if he had gone out not even a minute before. He had a bit of lipstick on his cheek and a not so different face from Regina's. He was drunk. _Very _drunk.

He saw her asleep on the couch and smiled; his beautiful little angel. She was sleeping peacefully but her face was covered with makeup. Probably she had been crying. He slowly reached for her and caressed one of her cheeks; he was tempted to wake her up, ask her what was wrong, why the hell she'd been crying herself to sleep. But he was… _God,_ he was too drunk. He couldn't even process a coherent thought with her by his side. He kissed her temple, took a blanked and wrapped it around her, sweetly, smiling at the marvel in front of his eyes.

"God, I love you so much, Regina Mills." he knew it was the alcohol talking, but that didn't make his words less true. He smiled one last time, then he went to sleep.

And finally, the voices in his head stopped talking.

* * *

They both woke up late, but it didn't matter. It was Saturday, they didn't work.

Regina was the one to wake up first and, for the first couple of minutes, she did nothing but moan and complain about the terrible, horrible headache she had. She ran to her toilet, fixed her hair and took an aspirin. Her face —good God, she was tired of looking at her face signed by the tears— was still covered with makeup and she prayed whoever was up there that Robin hadn't seen it. _If _he had come back. Not that it mattered anyway.

A chill of pure, sadistic curiosity ran through her back and for a moment she cursed herself for that: she shouldn't have cared, for Christ's sake!

She washed her face and considered the idea of taking a shower but… the shower was in his bathroom. To reach it, she should have had to walk into his room and finally find out the truth. If he had slept with Daniels or come back… what if he came back after making love to her? _Dammit, Mills, get a grip._

She shook her head, cursing everything and everyone; then she took off her dirty clothes from the night before and her underwear. She looked at herself, naked, in the mirror. She had nothing wrong, she was a beautiful woman and she could find someone else to start over… if it wasn't for her damn heart that beated for Robin and Robin only. Robin, that only saw her as a friend.

"fuck it all." she said, out loud. She started walking around the house, naked, but she didn't care: she was alone, she knew that he wasn't there, she could feel it. She started singing, carefree, she didn't care about anything anymore. She had decided that she would have gone her own way, found her happiness and someone she liked —who, most importantly, liked her back.

She took a towel from the drawer and started laughing, without an apparent reason.

"yeah, fuck Locksley. Fuck him!" she ran around to collect her products for the shower, then her underwear and, when she finally had everything she needed, she walked into his room, shouting one of her favorites songs by U2.

_"you say you want diamonds on a ring of gold, you say you want your story to remain un—" _the words died in her throat as she got surprised by a pair of ocean blue, still sleepy eyes, running straight across her body. His jaw dropped open, while Regina, with her cheeks burning red, tried to cover her body with the towel as best as she could.

"Robin! What the hell are you doing here? I-I thought— oh my God, I… I have to go." she slammed the door behind her after walking clumsily against the wall, trying not to reveal anything else. As she disappeared behind the door, Robin allowed himself to paint the biggest and cheekiest of grins on his lips. _Christ. Christ, Christ, Christ. _He had just seen her naked. Like, completely naked. Okay, maybe for just a couple of seconds, while he was still trying to decide which part of her body he was going to devour first with his eyes. Maybe he had started with her breasts, or maybe with those legs that tormented him for all those months. My God, _my. God._

He couldn't remember anything of when he had returned, he didn't remember the state in which he had found her, or of whispering a low _I love you_, before going to sleep. He just knew that his head was throbbing and now, because of her, even another part of his body.

_Oh no, you are not thinking about—_ he lifted the blankets up and realized the effect she had had on him. Again. He slowly, nonchalantly slipped his hand in his boxers cause, shit, it hurt. The whole thing was killing him, slowly. He wrapped his hand around his cock and started moving it, up and down, up and down, imagining that woman in every way, in all the possible positions, on, under and in front of him. "God, Regina" he was struggling to keep his voice low cause— Christ! She was in the next room! If he closed his eyes he could perfectly picture her mouth, her beautiful mouth wrapped around—

"God!" he screamed (luckily for him, she had already opened the water and she couldn't hear him), coming on his grey t-shirt. _Fucking hell._

He came, just by thinking about her, about his best friend, about the woman he had sworn to protect and to leave alone, free of living her life away from him… _Shit. _

He took off his shirt and threw it in among the clothes to wash. What the hell did he do? _You're a man, Locksley. Your feelings have nothing to do with it, trust me. It's just… simple, physical attraction towards a woman's body. You haven't fucked a woman in more than a year, God, it's normal!_

He took a deep breath and tried to convince himself that that was the truth. Just that.

"Robin" he heard her calling as she walked out of the bathroom. That towel, perfectly wrapped around her body, highlighted every curve of hers, every curve that he wanted to touch, kiss, love. _Get a fucking grip._  
"Robin, I'm so sorry, I just—" the redness on her cheeks was still burning and he couldn't help but smile:  
"it's okay, Mills, I've seen a naked woman before, you know? And, unfortunately, I didn't see much."

She laughed nervously and hit his shoulder, lovingly. "I'm so sorry, really, I didn't know you were back, so I was just…" she bit her lip "gosh, this is so embarrassing!" she covered her face with her hands and, for a moment, her wet hair fell forward to cover her forehead. Robin wrapped his arms around her in a shy hug: "you were singing and dancing naked? Well, yes, I admit it's embarrassing." they laughed together. _Nothing has changed, Locksley, nothing. _"you're beautiful and you don't have to be ashamed of me. We are friends, we live together, it happens." Yeah, _friends._

He cradled her in his arms for a bit, then she pulled away to look into his eyes:  
"I thought you stayed with Irene for the night." again, that light red tone coloring her cheeks.

"No. We… We had dinner. It was nice. She's amazing, interesting and beautiful, but I… I want to take my time." surprisingly, this time it was his turn to bit his lip nervously. It wasn't true and he knew it far too well. They could end up sleeping together and he knew that, both of them did, but everytime he tried to touch her, to kiss her… it just felt wrong. Something was holding him back and he knew far too well what it was, even though he tried to deny it with everything that he was.

So he had escorted her home and got drunk. Because his love for a beautiful angel was consuming his soul, it was keeping him from moving on.

Irene wasn't Regina. No matter how many times he went out with her, that wasn't going to change.

"looks like you're serious with her, Locksley."

"yeah." he looked down for a brief moment, but immediately found his smile again: "what about you? what did you do last night?"

Regina didn't reply and, just like him, bit her lip.

* * *

Two more weeks passed by and Robin had continued to go out with Daniels. Regina had, by then, accepted it and only asked him not to go out on Friday nights, to spend some time together. She just needed it, once a week, just for them. Every time he went out, she stayed up, waiting for him, holding her breath, wondering if another woman was touching the man she loved the way she wanted to. And every time she asked, he replied with a simple "nope", shook his head and smiled, putting a small, sweet kiss on her forehead, before going to sleep. And Regina could finally breathe again.

That Tuesday, though, something was different. Something was about to radically change their lives.

"see you later, Mills." he kissed her temple, as always, and she wished him good luck. Lately, he had spent more time with Daniels than he had with her, for an elegant dinner or a simple coffee, just like that afternoon. Regina tried to convince herself everyday that it was normal, that it was the best thing, for everyone. And, most of all, that she wasn't jealous.

She was fine. It was three in the afternoon and she had all the time in the world to dedicate to herself; she would have checked her guys' tests and waited for him to come back. But her quiet day got interrupted by a phone call: it was her realtor. The house she shared with Victor had finally been sold and at a higher price than she was expecting. A part of her, probably the biggest one, started jumping in joy, the other frowned: it was over. For good. And that included her cohabitation with Robin. They had agreed, since the very beginning: as soon as she would sold the house and bought another, she would leave. Forever.

"Thank you so much." she hung up the phone and sighed. It wasn't meant to be, now it was clear. Everything that happened with Robin, that wonderful friendship, their strange way of sharing each feeling… everything was over. Once and for all. Maybe they could still maintain their friendship, who knew…

She pulled out the suitcase from under the bed and put there the clothes she knew she would need for the next few days. She only let out a couple of shirts and some pants. And, of course, underwear.

She almost hoped that Robin spent the evening at Irene's, to not look into his eyes as she told him the news. But it didn't go as she planned: less than an hour later, Robin was already back and her suitcase was still on the bed, half empty. There wasn't time to hide it, she just had to tell him the truth.

"Mills, the council is in an hour." she heard him saying from the door "thank God Daniels reminded me. I'm the headmaster and I forgot, can you believe that?" Regina could hear his voice getting closer and closer, slowly accompanied by his steps.

"Regina?"

"hey" she greeted him with a smile as she came out of the bedroom and closed the door. Robin raised an eyebrow, perplexed, immediately getting the strange feeling that she was hiding something from him.

"is something wrong?"

Regina looked down: she didn't want and she couldn't lie to him. He didn't deserve that. Not to mention she didn't know how to: "Vivianne called me. She sold my house. This evening she'll give me the check and" she paused, taking a deep breath "tomorrow morning I'll go with her to visit some houses, she wants to make it quick. It's— It's over." she shrugged. Her eyes were shining as tiny tears had started to form in them, but she tried not to show it.

He stood silent for a moment, his mouth dry, full of words he didn't even know how to pronounce anymore:

"y-you don't have to leave, if you don't want to." he didn't know what he's saying. His head had started to spin like a carousel. He didn't understand anything, just that he was about to lose her.

He could no longer live without seeing her every morning, every time he opened his eyes. He could no longer smile without hearing her sing in the shower, or while preparing breakfast. He could no longer spend a Friday night on his couch, without her eating popcorns and watching horrible movies with him.  
No more Regina Mills.

No, it couldn't happen, it couldn't.

He knew that moment would come, sooner or later, he was expecting it. It was just— _you're ridiculous, Locksley. Stop making yourself promises you know you won't keep. You said you would leave her alone, free. _

"I have to, Robin. You have to live your life, take here the woman you're dating, prepare her one of your fantastic dinners and maybe even spend the night here, with her." _between the sheets in which you imagined yourself naked, under his body, every single night _"you have every right in the world to live a normal life and sharing a house with your best friend… well, it's not." _the best friend that did nothing but picturing you in all the ways under, on top and inside of her, all the goddamn time. _The voice inside of her head wouldn't stop screaming horrible, true things, as if that moment wasn't hard enough for her.

"please, stay a little more. Buying a new house isn't easy, I can help you choose it, I can—"

"Robin" she smiled "we won't lose our friendship." she grabbed the handle to open the door and it was there that he saw it: the suitcase on her bed, half-full. _It was real. She was leaving._

"please, don't." he put his hand on hers, as if he wanted to stop her from entering that room.

She looked at him into the eyes and it was like staring into a mirror. _No. Those are not tears, don't even think about it, Regina. _But they were. His eyes were just as watery as hers and for a moment, just a brief moment, Regina let herself go:

"why?"

They both got a strange sense of deja-vu: they had already lived that moment and it led to the best thing that ever happened to them. But this time it couldn't be like that, this time it was over. For real.

"Because I don't want you to leave." and it was true.  
"why?" she repeated. She just _had _to try one more time.

He didn't reply, just looked down. Regina shook her head: he wasn't going to admit it, ever. Not even to himself. _If _there was something to admit.

"I'll sleep in the guests room one more night, tomorrow before leaving I'll wash the sheets. Oh, by the way, I took a day off, if that's okay with you, it'll take a while, you know, I don't want to buy the first house I see, I want to be sure. I know I'll find the right one and you'll be the first person to visit it, I promise. I'll invite you for dinner and— I've always wanted to have a backyard, you know, a huge one." she tried to giggle "I'd want you to come with me but you're the headmaster, I understand, you have stuff to do. I guess tomorrow you'll have lunch with Daniels, so I don't want to be—" she was overtalking, but he could only catch a few words. Everything his brain could process was that she was about to leave him and he had to stop her. Somehow.

She tried to enter the room, but he stopped her again, this time by closing the door.

"don't go."

"why?" she asked again, this time almost irritated. What the hell was she expecting? That he was going to kneel in front of her and confess her his love? God, he couldn't really be that stupid…

"because it's not the same without you." his eyes buried deep in her chocolate ones.

Regina smiled, a bitter smile: "it's not enough."

Robin didn't understand anything anymore. A thousand voices were screaming in his head, each one said different things and the worst thing was that he couldn't understand a word. He wasn't even thinking straight anymore. _He couldn't lose her. _It was pure instinct, he was tired of always letting his head prevail on his heart, especially when it came to her. _He couldn't lose her. _She meant too much for him and he wanted her to know, especially now that she was explicitly asking him.

_He couldn't lose her. _

In a moment, his hand was behind her neck, in her hair, trying to bring her face closer to his. In less than an instant, his lips were finally on hers and Regina's back was pressed against the wall, hard. Finally, those lips that he had wanted so much were pressed on his and he couldn't get enough, her taste, her taste was never gonna be enough. Robin's tongue searched for hers as his hands caressed the skin of her back, her neck, her hair. Everything was so damn passionate and animalistic at the same time, nothing like they had imagined. She heard him suffocating a moan in her mouth and she wanted more, oh, so much more —God, she couldn't even believe this was happening. She felt him against her and smiled, she smiled because she was just as finally ready as he was, if not more, and it was a feeling she hadn't felt for a very, very long time.

"is _this _enough?" he panted, breaking the kiss to catch his breath.

"I-I—" they both were breathless, they both felt like living the most beautiful dream they've ever dreamed. He kissed her again, this time chastely, sweetly.

"I love you, Regina Mills. I've loved you since the first moment I saw you. Is _this _enough? Because, if it's not—" this time it was her turn to cut him off with a kiss, swallowing the beautiful smile he had just given her.

"God, did I have to leave this house to make you say it?" she giggled and then it was all about kisses. Many, sweet kisses. And smiles, wonderful smiles. He took her in his arms and she immediately wrapped her legs around his waist —she had waited too long not to do it.  
Regina tried to open the door to her bedroom but he shook his head:  
"no no" another kiss "I want you in my bed." he made her smile while he ran his hands down her back. She was so perfect, he had wanted to touch her for definitely too long. He put her down on the bed, as if she was the most delicate creature in the world —cause, to him, she was.  
"I love you." he whispered again, before sinking his lips in her neck. Regina moaned, arching her back, sticking his fingers in his blond hair. He kissed his way down to her breasts —which he had already freed from the blouse, unbuttoning it completely. Only a black bra separated his lips from her perfectly smooth skin.

He stopped to look at her for a moment and all that Regina could feel was his hot breath on her skin. God, she already missed his lips so much, it was crazy; it was like tasting heaven and being forced to leave it a second after.

"Robin?"

"I'm sorry, it's just— You're beautiful, Regina Mills." he looked at her straight into the eyes and her heart lost a beat. Her eyes were sparkling as never before, it actually gave him goosebumps. There was something totally different in him, something she had never seen before, in any man. She couldn't tell if it was desire, or love, or maybe both. Or perhaps he was simply crazy for that woman, head over heels in love with her and had wanted that moment for so long that it didn't even seem real.

She smiled and blushed, but it was different from the other times she blushed for him and he noticed it. Slowly, he freed her from the unbuttoned blouse and, with tiny, tender kisses, arrived to the zip of her blue pants.

"are you sure you want this, Regina?" he whispered against her skin as Regina bit her lip so hard that she could taste the metallic taste of blood on the tip of her tongue.

"please… yes, _please._" she panted.

He smiled again and, right when he was about to unzip her pants, he heard something vibrating in one of the pockets. _Shit. _She pulled it out quickly, just to see who it was.

"work."

"don't answer." he moaned as he traced sweet kisses around her navel. Regina giggled:  
"I have to, or my boss will get so angry." she sat up, trying to calm her breath. Then, on the fifth ring, she answered: "Mills."

Robin couldn't believe it: she was there, half naked in front of him. The woman he had wanted with every inch of his being for months was right there for him, they were finally together and there was still… another obstacle between them. He saw her smiling at him and recognized that spark, that desire she had to play:

"the council, of course I remember. Only an idiot would forget about it." she looked straight into the eyes. _Oh, she so wanted to play._ He buried his lips in her neck, kissing, sucking every inch, up to her ear, slowly licking her skin.  
"Christ!" she moaned, throwing her head back "I mean— of course, I'll be there in ten." he sucked there, behind her lobe, hard. "Oh my— sure I'll tell Rob—mh, Mr Locksley. Ok, bye." she threw the phone somewhere and glared at him. If looks could kill, he would've been dead on that bed, right then.

"how old are you?"

"enough to do this." he wanted to mark her on her neck again but she stopped him just in time, laughing. "God, I want you, Regina Mills. I want you too much, I'm going mad." he caressed her arm, while his eyes devoured her breasts one more time.

"I want you too, Robin, but apparently we'll have to wait a bit more." she placed a tender kiss on his lips.

"tonight. I want you all night, Regina, until dawn, till we pass out. I want to make you come again, and again, until you'll fall asleep in my arms, finally mine." she closed her eyes, feeling every word like a whisper, straight against her lips. She had to bit her lip to stop herself from moaning again and he noticed it, smiling.  
They finally had each other, the rest just didn't matter.

**thoughts?  
**:)


	10. Chapter 10

**thank you all for reading the story so far! a special thank you for all the reviews, they make me smile and encourage me to write more and more. **

**sorry for all the mistakes as always! **

* * *

During the meeting, Robin and Regina couldn't stop yearning, sharing glances and mischievous smiles. Christ, _Christ,_ they were acting like teenagers at their first crush. But they couldn't help it; they were so stupidly in love and immensely happy of finally being together that they couldn't stop smiling for a single moment.

Daniels was there too, sitting at the other side of the table, searching for Robin's eyes at every chance she got, but him… his mind -and heart- were elsewhere, he didn't even realize she was trying to make eye contact with him. The woman he wanted was right in front of him, staring at him though her long, dark lashes with the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.

She scribbled something on her notebook and he was dying to know what it was; he just wanted to know what she was thinking, how she was feeling, if her heart was beating just as fast as his. God, he felt like a complete idiot, but he was in love, madly, utterly in love with that angel.

The meeting seemed to end soon: after all, it was just a formality, they always managed to make it in less than an hour. Robin looked at his watch and smiled at the fact that it was only six: he had plenty of time to go home with her, cook her dinner and prepare a perfect evening for the two of them. Just the two of them, finally, together.

"so, Mr Locksley" he heard her voice from behind his back and he couldn't help but turn and smile at her. The desire of taking her, hugging and kissing her again, and again, and again, was just too much. But they couldn't. Not there. Not so soon. "are you sure you aren't too tired to spend an evening with me?" she smiled, joking.

"Hmm.. maybe, you know. I changed my mind and I don't even want it so much…" he tried to keep a straight face but he couldn't; it was probably the biggest lie he had ever said, to anyone. He laughed, dragging herself behind him:  
"oh, that's awesome! You know, Baylor, the gym teacher, kept staring at me at the meeting and… Mh, maybe I should go out with him tonight. He's so handsome… athletic…" she bit her lower lip and, for a moment, Robin had to hold himself back from taking her arm, pushing her gently against the wall and kiss her senseless, right there, just to remind her and everyone there that she was his, his only, and he loved her.

"oh, really?" he laughed nervously "Baylor, uh? Well, tell Baylor that I'm not tired at all and, if tomorrow he won't see you at work, it'll be because you won't be able to walk for how many times I'll take you tonight, Regina." he said it aloud, regardless of the people around them and the fact that they could possibly hear him. Regina gave him a a pat on his back, definitely harder than the ones she usually gave him, as her cheeks reddened immediately.

"Robin!" she exclaimed.

"oh, but believe me, it's the truth." she saw him distracting for a moment, then, when he realized he had finally reached a little-used area of the school, he took her hand and pulled her away with him. They reached the library, slipping between the aisles overflowing with books and, when he finally found an empty one, he pushed her in there, against one of the shelves, kissing her as if his life depended on it.

Regina found herself mentally thanking heaven for making her put on a skirt that morning as she felt his hands slowly raising it, jus enough to allow her to wrap her thighs around his waist.

"God, we look like horny teenagers" she suffocated a smile against his neck as she kissed him again, and again, and again. He didn't reply, he just closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of having Regina Mills' lips finally against him, on every inch of his skin and soul.

"You have no idea how much I want you, Regina." he put her down for a moment, just to allow her to spread her legs slightly, as much as he needed to caress her inner thigh, going up until he finally met her panties. Wet, soaked. "but, I assure you, I have an idea of how much _you _want me, right now." that smirk that drove her insane invaded her chocolate pools one more time, before she closed them at the contact between his skin and the wet cloth of her underwear.

"oh" she moaned, throwing her head back, leaving him more room to enjoy with his lips and tongue. She felt his fingers slipping under the cloth and held her breath for a moment. _Christ, _she needed those fingers, everywhere. "Robin" she tried not to yell, but she couldn't keep her voice low, not in that situation.

"not here, my love. I want to enjoy every moment, I want to look at you in the eyes as you come on my fingers, on my tongue, around me. I want to feel you shuddering repeatedly and moaning out my name without having to worry about adjusting the tone of your voice. I want you to feel free, Regina, and, most of all, loved." he caressed her one more time, then helped her straightening her skirt and gently licked his fingers clean. God, she tasted so damn good.

Regina was observing every move and moaned, as if he was still touching her. It was amazing the effect that man had on her.

"you taste amazing, I'd gladly spend the rest of my life savoring you." he smiled, giving her a kiss that tasted of her. It was the first time Regina tasted herself, the first time a man cared about her enough to make her feel like she could do anything.

"let's go, before they find us." he whispered.

* * *

Right when they were about to get out of school, a female voice called out Robin's name, and this time it was not the one he wanted to hear.

"Robin!" he turned around and saw her: Irene Daniels. The woman who deserved so much more than what he could give her; him, that could only offer her a couple of dinners and a coffee, or an occasional lunch. They had tried, tried so hard, but it wasn't meant to be, or better: he was madly in love with another woman, the angel he shared his house with. Once, Irene had tried to kiss him and he hadn't stopped her. It had been just another confirmation of how impossible it was for him to feel someone else's lips against his, it was as if they were meant to be just for Regina's, as if that woman was the missing piece of his heart, of his _soul._ And now that he had finally found her, he had no intention of letting her go (at least she wanted him to) that easily. To make sure of that, he had to get rid of what it had become nothing but a third wheel:

"Irene, hi!" he gave her a friendly kiss on her cheek, hoping that Regina, who was right beside him, waiting for him to go home, wouldn't mind. Or maybe he wanted her to? The thought of her being jealous of him like he was of her excited him. He wanted to try, but not then, not when there was still nothing certain or remotely defined in their relationship.

"Hi! I've been looking for you after the council, but you literally disappeared! Where the hell were you?"

"Uh…" he seemed to blush slightly. _I actually had my hands busy between this woman's thighs, the woman I love, whom I can't wait to go home and make love with, if all of you stopped interrupting, _the voice inside his head wanted to shout. "Regina had to take a book in the library and she needed my advice." he shifted, so that Irene could see Regina behind him.

"hey, Regina!" said the green-eyed woman with a gorgeous smile. She was really kind and she didn't deserve al the thoughts full of hatred, jealousy that Regina had had of her.

"Irene, how are you?"

"good, thanks." she looked back at Robin, then at Regina, then at Robin again. Regina seemed to understand: "uh… I'll wait for you in the car, Robin, it seems you two have a lot to talk about…"

"oh that's not necessary, really! Stay, I know how important you are to Robin. You're like a sister to him, right?" Robin almost choked on his own saliva. _Yep, a sister I imagined in all the possible positions -and even the impossible ones, trust me, we'll make it work. _He wanted to laugh at the thought of what, only a few minutes before, they were doing in the library, and he almost did when he remembered that his hand still had the taste of Regina Mills.

"yep" Regina blushed, as if she had read in Robin's twisted mind. He managed to repress his laughter and just smiled:

"what did you want to ask me, Irene?"

"truthfully, I… I just wanted to ask you out for dinner. Tonight."

_Shit. _"tonight?"

"yep. Is that a problem? Because something happened and I… I want to talk you about it. Really, Robin, I need to talk to you as soon as possible." he could almost see a slight blush on Irene's cheeks. What the hell could be worse than that? She clearly didn't want to tell him she's in love with him and she wanted more, right? _Shit, not that night. _

He turned for a moment to look at Regina, noticing the way the beautiful smile she had on her lips just a moment before had faded, replaced by the shadow of someone who had just seen the chance of a perfect evening they'd been waiting for a lifetime, vanishing.

"of course. I mean, of course it's not a problem, _Ren, _I'll pick you up at eight." he smiled at her politely and gave her another kiss before turning to face the woman he loved.

"bye Regina!" Irene waved her hand and smiled.

She returned the gesture, coldly.

* * *

Neither of them said a word on the way home. They didn't even dare to utter a sigh. Regina felt as if a huge, heavy boulder was crushing her stomach and, simultaneously, was preventing her heart from beating. It was as if it all was suspended, hanging by a thread, just waiting to be fixed.

They entered the house and she hurried to find some documents in the drawer: she still had to see Vivianne; she still wanted to collect her check and think about what to do with all that messy, complicated situation.

"I shall return in an hour, I see Vivianne at seven. You will be probably already gone by the time I come back, so… have a good evening." her eyes didn't dare to meet his, not even for a second, too fearful to find the guilt she wouldn't be able to bear.

"Regina—" he tried to grab her hand but she slipped away, taking her bag and the phone from the kitchen counter.

"I have to go, Robin."

"please, my love, wait." he managed to stop her with those words. She turned to face him and finally found the courage to bury her chocolate brown pools in his ocean blue ones. She stood still, in front of him, letting him say what he needed her to know:  
"nothing's changed between us, is it?" he bit the inside of his cheek, nervously.

"Robin, there's nothing between us, it's not even started." she smiled, bitterly "Look, I have suffered… for almost all my life. The man I believed was the love of my life turned out to be a bastard, who treated me like an object and always took me for granted. Please, please don't you dare doing it too. I couldn't bear it, even if I tried. Because, believe me, Locksley, you're all I want, all I have, the person I trust the most in the whole world." she paused, to suffocate a sigh "At first I was afraid: the sole thought of a man getting close to me, touching me, kissing me, winning my confidence… it just made me sick. But when I met you, it was as if my heart told me that you were different, you were not like Victor, and you're never gonna be. As if… I know it sounds ridiculous, but I felt as if someone had sent a guardian angel to take care of me, always." she had to pause again, to kick away a tear that inevitably fell on her perfectly red cheeks "don't break my heart, Robin Locksley, please."

Robin stood still for a few seconds, paralyzed, unable to find words that were worth at least half the ones she had chosen to express her feelings. It was there that he realized: she had not yet told him she loved him because she was scared, not that he may not feel the same —about that she was more than sure— but because saying it out loud would make it real. And Robin knew that, when Regina Mills loved, she did it with every inch of her being, every part of her.

So he hugged her, held her in his arms, tightly, and let her cry on his shoulder without saying another word. His hands at first slid down her back, then through her hair, then he cupped her face and sank his eyes into hers, smiling:

"I would never forgive myself for that, ever. I'd rather die than seeing you suffer more, for my sake. I love you more than anything, Regina, and I swear, I swear to everything I have that I never took you for granted, I never thought of you as an object or a one-night stand. I want a forever with you, I want to spend everyday of my life with you, waking up next to you, having breakfast with you, go to work with you and come back home with you, take our future dog out for a walk after dinner, come back and make love to you all night, and then repeat it all over again, until we're old." he heard her giggling and allowed himself to do the same. "I love you, and I'm going to scream it to the world, starting from Daniels, tonight." he caressed her cheeks sweetly, kissed both of them, then finally made their lips touch. "I love you." another kiss, then another and another.

"I—I just… please don't hurt Irene. She's always so kind to both of us" he smiled at the infinite sweetness that was that woman; even while confessing their deepest feelings to each other, she though of a way to protect others, as if they were worthier than her, as if their happiness mattered more than hers.

"I won't hurt her, I'll just tell her the truth, my love. Irene deserves a lot, just like us. She deserves to find someone who loves her just as much as I love you." Regina wanted to cry again, but this time of joy. She just wanted to be held in his arms and feel him as much as possible, touch every inch of him, just to make sure he was real and not just a dream. She couldn't believe she deserved that wonderful man, her, who had always believed she didn't deserve anything.

They hugged again and she let him kiss her forehead:

"the only thing I'm actually sorry for is the fact that we'll have to postpone our evening once more."

Regina smiled: "we have a lifetime for us, Robin. You go, I'll wait here." she pulled away, as much as she needed to look straight into his eyes: "and when you come back, we could…" she blushed violently, making him smile.  
"what, my love?"

"well…"

He kissed her again, and again, and again. "tell me, my love, what do you want to do when I get back?"

"I-I—" she got interrupted by another kiss.

"do you want to make love to me, Regina?" he whispered, moving his lips on her neck, making her strangle a moan.

"yes" she ran her fingers through his blond hair, pushing his head against her skin, making him understand how much she needed the contact between his lips and her flesh. He lifted her off the ground, putting her down on the kitchen counter, making her moan at the contact between her half-naked legs and the cold marble. He captured her lips with his, while his hands were slipping under her skirt, stroking her skin, arriving to the fabric of her panties. Again.

"Regina, if we continue like this, I won't be able to stop myself." he whispered, but Regina wasn't even listening anymore, she couldn't. He was so close, so close to where she wanted him the most. "Oh, my love" he groaned, reluctantly pulling his hands from under her skirt, bringing them around her face; they were warm and smelled of her.

"Robin, I can't take it anymore, I need you." she put her forehead against his, breathing him in for a few seconds, while she still tried to regulate her breath.

"me too, Regina, I need to feel you, to be inside of you… I want you so much." every sentence was succeeded by a sweet kiss. "I promise you that when all of this will be over and there will be no more obstacles to divide us, we will dedicate ourself to each other, for as long as you want." he made the tip of her nose brushing against hers, then he kissed it, making her smile.

"I love you."

She took a deep breath, as if she was trying to find courage, and probably she was: "I love you too, Robin."

* * *

Those four words gave him the strength to go on, to leave the house with a smile that night, even though he knew that he was giving up the first night they could spend together. She had told him she loved him. She loved him too. Despite the fear of losing him, despite the fact that she believed that she was bound to lose everything she loved… she had told him; because he had to know, he deserved to know.

It was just midnight when he returned and he had a beautiful smile on his lips: the dinner with Daniels had turned out to be completely different from what he expected; she ended up telling him what he did not believe it was possible and he couldn't wait to tell Regina. It was as if a huge weight had been lifted from his heart.

He thought of her, of the words she had said to him —_"you want to make love to me?" "yes"— _as he turned the key in the door. He almost quivered with desire of seeing her, making love to her, that night.  
"my love?" the lights were out, only the bajour in their bedroom was still on. He smiled as he found her lying in his bed, under the covers. She was sleeping, his beautiful angel, or so he thought:

"Robin?" she said, sleepily.

"I'm here, my love." he whispered as he took off his shoes and, soon after, his pants. Regina couldn't see him, but she would've been pleasantly surprised by that spectacle. He also removed the shirt, remaining bare-chested, imprinting that mischievous smile on his face. Oh, she would have loved that view.

"hmmm" she moaned unconsciously at the contact between their bodies, as he got under the covers and hugged her tightly. Robin's body was so warm and inviting, and the way he had immediately opened his arms to hold her… she felt at home, finally. "How was your dinner?" she whispered, as she turned to sink her face in his chest, breathing his scent in deeply. God, it was all she needed.

"ah, well! There was no need to talk to Daniels." he smiled, kissing her temple. Regina widened her eyes, now fully awake:

"what?"

"yep. _She _talked to me. Apparently she found another man that makes her heart beat fast, but she still wants us to remain good friends." he couldn't help but laugh at the immediate reaction and concern in Regina's eyes, that, immediately, breathed a sigh of relief:  
"oh thank God, I was afraid that—"

"what? that I would break her heart?" he whispered, almost offended.

"No, you would never, and I know that. It's just… I was afraid she wouldn't take it well." they stood in silence for the following seconds, then he kissed her again.

"Robin?" He called.  
"yes, my love?"

"promise me we'll stay like this all night. Promise me." it was a weak whisper that Robin could barely hear. He smiled, taking her chin between his fingers so he could look deeply into her eyes:  
"It's all I want, Regina, there's no need to promise." she smiled in the dark of that room before he could remind her one more time how much he loved her.

Regina squeezed him tightly, resting her face on his chest and, slowly, fell asleep. Happy and complete at last.

**thoughts? :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**finallyyyy here it is! I hope you like it. This one's for everyone who patiently waited for this moment all this time. as always, please forgive all the mistakes, english is not my 1st language xoxo **

The alarm clock rang at six precise, as each morning. But this time, the awakening was not as unpleasant as always; the first thing they both saw was each other, and the reaction was immediate: a smile. A beautiful one.

"Good morning, my love." he breathed, as he felt her stretching gently beside him. He smiled again, spontaneously, while he still tried to convince himself that it was not a dream, it was reality, the reality he was gonna live every day for the rest of his life.

"Hmmm, good morning!" she chuckled. His lips were the first thing she tasted that morning as she finally allowed hers to brush against his soft ones. Her beautiful brown eyes were still closed, too scared to receive the very first ray of light of the day, and Robin couldn't help but be touched by how sweet she was.

Regina smiled and kissed his shoulder; it was a gentle kiss, but it had something mischievous that drove him insane.

"so, would you like to have breakfast with me, today? Our first breakfast as a couple." she asked in that innocent tone.

"Hmm, of course, Miss Mills. What would you like to eat?" kisses, kisses and more kisses. Regina was holding in her arms what she believed it would remain just a dream, a typical scene of those pathetic movies she used to watch when she was fourteen.

"Waffles. With a lot of chocolate." another kiss "And cream."

Robin's mind flew somewhere else at her words, while, on his tongue, he could almost feel the taste of Regina Mills.

"Consider it done." he tried to break away from her and she gasped:  
"Ok then, I'll take a shower in the meantime." she shrugged, nonchalantly.

Robin's eyes almost popped out of his head: "W-what?"

"A shower, Locksley." she took off her tank top, remaining with just her white lace bra on. Robin's pants, despite the fact that they were made of a soft cloth, began to tighten at that sight: she was stunning.

"You know how to take a shower, right?" she laughed mischievously "You take your clothes off, get under the water…" she got out of bed, dropping her shorts to her feet.

She was in her underwear. In her simple, coordinated, white lace underwear that contrasted perfectly with her olive skin. Robin felt as if someone was strangling him: he didn't even know how to breathe anymore.

"Regina…" he groaned as she slowly slide the strap of her bra along her shoulder. _Christ._

"I'll see you later, Locksley" she smiled and… God, that smile. She disappeared behind the bathroom door, but not before showing him a large view of her back. _That. Ass._

Robin was finally able to breathe a sigh of relief and, for a brief moment, he thought of throwing a glass of ice water in his face to reduce the temperature of his body that had increased way too much at that sight.

Or maybe he could reach her in the shower… _No. _He knew that the biggest part of him wanted to wait.

He went into the kitchen and tried to concentrate for a few minutes on something other than Regina Mills' perfect body. For example, their breakfast: he put the waffles in the microwave and melted some milk chocolate —Regina's favorite, there was no doubt.— in a saucepan. The whipped cream was still to be made, so he poured it in an orange bowl and got busy.

"Hmm, it smells delicious" he heard her saying as she walked into the room. When Robin turned around to look, he nearly dropped all the dishes he was holding in his hands: she was wearing a simple white silk robe and her hair, just dried, was falling over her shoulders, slightly caressing her chest. He knew her well enough to know that under that thin layer of cloth she had nothing.

He had to bit his lip to keep himself from cursing.

He was still shirtless and those abs she had desired to touch and underline with her tongue for far too long were right in front of her, finally. She approached him slowly with _that _smirk.

"Cream" she whispered, low.

"W-what?" Robin could barely speak.

"You're about to make whipped cream." she dipped her fingers into the bowl, then licked them slowly, with the sweetest smile. Robin didn't know if her intention was to drive him insane or simply to look like the innocent child he was, by then, sure she wasn't.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck._

"My love" he moaned as Regina passed her wet fingers along Robin's chest. "are you trying to kill me this morning?" he said it out loud, almost unconsciously.

She ran her hands all over his abs, stroking one by one, carefully, devouring every inch of his skin with her eyes. She closed her arms around his neck and looked at him straight in the eyes: "I want you." she whispered tenderly, looking at him through those long dark lashes of hers that Robin loved so much.

It was there that he found himself unable to control his body anymore: he wanted her too, _Christ, if he wanted her. _He was constantly searching for the perfect moment to make love to her, but he didn't understand that every moment was perfect for two people who had desired and wanted each other as much. He placed his hands on her hips, pushing Regina's body even closer to his than it already was. He brought their lips together in a tremendously passionate kiss as he lifted her up and took her in the bedroom, as if she was his bride.

Robin couldn't hear it, but Regina's heart was beating wildly. She was feeling like when, as a teenager, she made love for the very first time. It was all so new, all to be discovered. He slowly placed her on the mattress, without ever looking away from her eyes. He let his sweat pants slip down from the waist to his feet, then finally took them off. His boxers were black and, when Regina's eyes inevitably fell on them she couldn't keep herself from biting her lip. It was as if she had never seen anything like that before, as her first experience, as if she couldn't predict his next move. And it was true: she couldn't. All she remembered from a similar situation was violence, pain, terror. And then, when he leaned over her and wrapped his arms around her body, leaning on his palms not to crush her with his weight, she felt like the happiest and most loved woman she had ever known.

He brought his eyes into hers, firmly, as his hand wandered down her chest, looking for the belt of her silk robe. When he found it, he opened it and gently pulled it down, until he was finally able to throw it away.

_Oh my God. _She was finally naked in front of him. She was a vision, the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life. Her smooth skin, her firm breasts and her nipples, hard and almost as red as her cheeks; her flat stomach, and those legs… _God, those legs. _Robin Lockley had always looked, admired, desired every inch of Regina Mills' legs, it wasn't a secret. From the first day he laid eyes on her he realized: he would have recognized those legs anywhere.

"You're…" _beautiful? stunning? _In all honesty, every word seemed trivial, obvious and definitely din't suit the situation: she was so much more, and he knew it. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, my love." he saw her smiling and blushing lightly, while her arms closed around his neck:  
"Make love to me, Robin." there was no need to say more to bring back that tender smile on his lips; he leaned gently against her chest, kissing every inch from the neck down. He buried his mouth in the valley between her perfect breasts and heard her moaning, sighing, arching her spine, way too much for a simple contact with his lips. But he couldn't complain, he loved her being hypersensitive to anything concerning him, he loved the way his kisses made her moan and took her breath away.  
"I love you" he whispered while, with his tongue, he traced the outline of one of her hard nipples. He felt Regina's fingers slipping between his blond hair and pulling, _hard_. "I love you so much" he repeated, as he took her nipple in his teeth and applied a light pressure, just enough to make her moan again. He traced a trail of kisses up to her right breast, practicing the same movements, as his free hand continued to pleasure the other side, massaging her flesh in tender circles.

"Robin" she breathed out in pleasure "please" her hands wandered down his back, scratching gently, without hurting him.

"What do you want, my love?" he smiled, breathing on her stomach, making her wince. He was tracing a path with his lips, along the belly, down to the navel, pausing around it, with his tongue, looking straight into her dark eyes. "Tell me and I'll give it to you."

A groan filled the empty room when Robin's mouth finally had a first, sweet taste of Regina Mills. Her skin was perfectly smooth, it slipped under his tongue as if she was born to be a victim of his mouth. He kissed her mound, repeatedly, gently. Regina trembled at every move he made, she wanted more, she wrapped her legs around his face, pressing her thighs together to get more pleasure. She was going crazy.

"oh my God, Robin" she almost yelled. She knew he wasn't going to continue unless she explicitly told him to, she knew him: when he wanted something, he perfectly knew how to get it. To him, it was important that she left herself go, that she told him her deepest desires.

"what do you want, my love?" she heard him repeating.

Regina felt her cheeks heating up like never before as she ran a hand down her stomach, between her legs, until she reached his mouth. There she laid her index finger, on his lips, stroking them gently, then brought it down again, on her womanhood, as to indicate it. She had been clear and the sweetness she put in every gesture made him smile like a child.

It was enough for now.

Slowly, gently, he ran his tongue along her sex, watching her arching her spine while her hands clutched the sheets so hard that her knuckles turned white.

"Robin!" she shouted as the pleasure grew more and more. She hadn't felt such pleasure in years, years in which she didn't even believe it was possible anymore.

She was feeling his lips, tongue, even his teeth everywhere, on every inch of her body, straight to her brain.

"Oh my—" she parted her lips, forming a perfect "o" while arching her back up. Robin took the opportunity to support her arse with his warm hands and sink his mouth completely into her. He felt her shuddering, moaning, screaming and finally coming, on his tongue, on his lips, he had her taste everywhere.

He smiled, one of those satisfied smiles mixed with the simple joy of making her feel that long-forgotten pleasure.

As she watched the most intense pleasure taking shape on her face, he felt the desire to make her come again, and again, and again. And this time, he wanted to be inside of her while she did.

He tried to take his boxers off quickly, but not too much, as he wanted to memorize her like that: the image of her face completely invaded by the pleasure was forever saved in his memory.

"I want you, my love, I need to feel you." her hard nipples brushing against his chest were driving him even crazier than he already was, if that was possible, as he wondered if he would have been able to control himself, once he was finally inside of her.

"Then take me, Robin. I won't break, I swear." she whispered, still breathless from her first orgasm. He smiled sweetly while their lips were joined together once again, this time accompanied by their bodies. For Regina, feeling him inside of her was like being finally complete, as if someone had entered her missing puzzle piece, as if she had found the only piece compatible with her whole being.

She moaned as he whispered one more time how much he loved her. She felt him moving inside of her and it was so different from what she was used to, so new: she felt him in every inch of her body as he moved inside and out, inside and out, carefully not to hurt or startle her in any way. He heard her moaning in his ear and whispering words he would have never expected to hear from her. He smiled at that thought: oh, se had done so much more than simply give voice to her wishes.

She brought her hands behind his neck, urging him to look into her eyes, so that she could let him understand what she wanted without needing to speak. Her face was contracted in ecstasy and Robin couldn't help but smile at it: it was thanks to him if she felt so good, he couldn't help himself from gloating and feeling proud: she deserved everything in the world and, now that they were both close to their climax, he wanted to make sure everything was perfect, like he had wanted from the very beginning.

"Kiss me." she asked, before he could suffocate the millionth whimper with his mouth.

Robin knew he could let go inside of her and he also knew that he wasn't going to last much longer; however he wanted to wait, to extend that time as much as possible, to wait her, give her as much pleasure as he could.

And they came, they came together, at the same time, such was the harmony among them. Although he felt like he wanted to just close his eyes and collapse at her side, Robin took his time to stare at her, once again, her whole body quivering, her mouth wide open and her eyelids heavily abandoned over her pupils. For a second he doubted that she was still breathing, that her heart could still beat, but when she opened her coffee brown eyes that for him, and him only, had turned darker that morning, he smiled and rolled to her side.

He was still inside of her and Regina couldn't help but enjoy that feeling for some more: she turned to face him and they hugged, they kissed, they smiled to each other. They were finally complete and that feeling was absolutely the best they both had ever felt.

"I love you" she whispered. Another blow to the heart. It would have been the same everytime he told her, she was more than sure.

"I love you" she replied, with another kiss.

* * *

They had stayed in that position for minutes, they simply forgot about time: to them, they were just seconds, brief moments. They only noticed it had been almost an hour when, between their kisses and naughty smiles, Regina's eyes ended up on the alarm clock.

_Twenty to eight. Twenty to fucking eight._

"Shit!" she exclaimed, making him laugh like an idiot:  
"Miss Mills! How unusual of you to use such language!"

"oh, fuck you!" another laugh, so spontaneous that he couldn't help but return it "look what you've done, now we're late!"

"What _I_'ve done?"

"You, of course."

"I'd like to remind you that _you_ walked into my kitchen, practically naked." he tried to tickle her but she managed to escape, getting out of bed as she tried to cover herself with the sheets.

"Oh, sure, now it's my fault if I'm irresistible." he laughed crazily even though, deep down, he knew she was right: she was irresistible and he couldn't and didn't even try to deny it.

"Well, Miss Irresistible" he stood up too but, unlike her, he didn't bother to cover himself at all. Regina had to bite her lip as she tried in every way to avoid blushing: she had already seen him naked, and_ very closely,_ how could he still have that effect on her?

"where you think you're going?"

"to take a shower, Mills. You know how to take a shower, right?" he quoted the words she had used before, with that smirk that drove her insane and not always in a positive way. He walked towards her with that smugness of his and that body… _Christ, that body._

"alright." she murmured.

"alright."

"fine."

"fine." she bit her lip again, while her face was now only a few inches away from Robin's. She wasn't going to kiss him, no, she knew his intentions and she couldn't let him. It was a quarter to eight, for Christ's sake, they couldn't start their relationship by getting late at work, he was her boss!

She watched him wrapping his long fingers around the soft sheet that was still determined to cover Regina's body. He just needed to pull it a little to let it fall to her feet; and there she was again, completely naked in front of him, with those big Bambi eyes that made her look like an innocent little girl.

"Now," she whispered softly, tracing the outline of his shoulder with her fingertips "I'm going to get dressed and you'll take your shower —alone, I don't care if that means I'll have to kick your ass.- You know why, Locksley?" she smiled all proud of herself for having been able to resist to the uncontrollable desire of kissing him senseless and start what they had finished doing just a few minutes before all over again. "Because I love you, and I don't want our relationship to start in the wrong way." she kissed his chest, right there, where his heart was beating, then she smiled again: "Do not think of me down there." and, with that, she left. To get dressed. Away from him.

**thoughts?**


	12. Chapter 12

**as always, sorry I'm late! I hope you like this chapter, it's short and fluffy af. I'm sorry but hey! it's here so you may want to read it ? idk its late here so I really need to sleep lol enjoy! sorry for all the mistakes I'm sure there will be plenty**

Robin Locksley knew he had done a mistake in the exact moment she laid eyes on Regina Mills and thought of her _that _way. When hen he had thought even for just a second that, between them, there could be much more than just a complicity between colleagues. He knew it was all intended to lead to something else, deep down he had always knew, even when he had promised himself that he was never gonna think of her like she was something more than a friend.

But it was when he realized he could no longer even make a meaningful sentence without thinking about her, about how he had felt when he had taken full possession of her body, of every centimeter of her soul, that he understood that that woman was under his skin and he knew that such madness could only lead to troubles. Troubles that none of them had idea how to face, obviously.

He kept telling himself that it was just the beginning, they hadn't been together for 48 hours and, after having desired each other for so long, such utter fools in love behavior was perfectly normal.

"I need to see you. Now." he sent that text when he was pretty sure she had the break. He knew, by then, her schedule by heart.

She arrived in his office exactly five minutes later -the time she needed to get rid of her Gossip Girls colleagues who used every precious minute to gossip about everything and everyone, and take the elevator up to his office.

Her hair was a real mess, typical of when she was in a hurry. Light, dark locks were falling before her eyes, framing her angelic face in an almost deliberate way. She was perfect. When he saw her, he removed his glasses and threw them somewhere on the desk, he jumped up from his chair and wrapped his arms around her waist: he kissed her, kissed her as if he hadn't seen her for days, when in fact only three hours had passed by.

Regina found herself against the door of his office, while Robin took her bottom lip between his lips and applied a gentle, pleasant pressure before pulling away. He saw her swallowing a moan and smiled to himself: she had missed him too.

"Tell me if I'm going crazy, Regina, but I can't stop thinking about you." he whispered, more serious than ever, as he took her face in his hands and started leaving short, tiny kisses here and there on that soft skin of hers that tasted of peach flowers and vanilla -just like her bubble bath that that morning he had had the pleasure of trying.

"Then I'm going crazy too." she breathed, looking for his lips with hers one more time.

"What's happening to us, my love? We look like smitten teenagers." Robin's hands wandered down her back as he held her in his protective embrace and rocked her gently, as if they were dancing to their very own imaginary melody.

"We are simply in love, I guess." she smiled, kissing the tip of his nose as he usually did with her. She made him smile.

"I can't even close my eyes for a moment without thinking of you, of your smile, of all the things we did this morning…" that smirk, again.

Regina returned it, with the same mischief: "I have to meet Vivianne this afternoon, but tonight we could…" she bit her lip, blushing "Do it again."

Robin frowned while Regina felt his hands slowly slipping down from her back:  
"You have an appointment with Vivianne?" confusion and probably anger were rising in his voice "Are you still going to buy a house?"

"Robin…" she sighed. He saw her looking down, as if she felt guilty for what she was about to say, and it was true: "It's just that… I want to have a house. A house I can count on in case… things don't work out between us."

"You mean if I become a crazy maniac like the son of a bitch you married? Someone who beats his wife and almost kills her? Is that what you fear?" he raised his voice, but just slightly: he was always very careful with her, with every word, every gesture.

Regina's eyes were sparkling, but there wasn't any joy in them as before, it was because of tears: they had never really argued before, except once, and she remembered perfectly well how it ended. She didn't know how to react, she just knew she didn't want it to end up like that. She didn't want to feel that emptiness again.

"Robin, please—"

"Regina, look at me," he said firmly, as he took her face in his hands, gently, and brought his eyes in hers; they were large, full of tears that were ready to get out but he wouldn't let them, _ever._

"My love, I would never, ever hurt you. I swear I'd rather die than be the cause of your pain and tears, like I am now." he stroked her cheeks, moving his thumbs under her eyes, as if he wanted to wipe away the tears that he would never let fall.

"I know, Robin, I do, really!" she whispered, giving him a weak smile "It's just that…"

"What?"

He watched her looking down again and biting her lip nervously, while her cheeks -which were still under his soft thumbs- were slowly heating up. She was conflicted: a part of her wanted him to know all of her insecurities while the other kept telling her that it was just a silly thing, but if, by telling him, they would have avoided an argument, she would tell him. Absolutely.

"I'm afraid that… well… we made love for the first time this morning. How many more could you still want me? Two? Maybe three, but they you'll get bored. I'll bore you. Because, in all honesty, Robin, I know that I'm not Miss Universe, nor I have a perfect body or whatever, but—" she got interrupted by some kind of yelp: her own. Robin had lifted her up and made her sit on his desk, making her smile unconsciously: what the hell was wrong with that crazy in love man?

"Now listen to me, okay?" he said, his eyes firmly buried in hers. Regina imperceptibly nodded. "I love you. I love you like mad and, no matter how hard you'll try, you'll never make me believe, even for a second, that I might get tired of you. I want you, Regina. I've wanted you for months without being able to touch, taste, feel you and now that you're finally mine…" he let out a giggle because, God, _God,_ that situation was ridiculous! She couldn't really think that he would get tired of her, it just couldn't be possible! "Regina, I can't stop thinking about you, about your body under mine, your skin under my fingertips and my mouth on every single inch of your being. I want to do everything we did this morning all over again, and more. I want you here, now, on this table. I want you on my chair, on the couch, against the wall. I want you on every desk, in every classroom, on every chair, against every blackboard. I want you in our house, on the kitchen table, on our couch, in the guest room, then in our bed again, only to start all over again." he saw her biting her lip at those words and he couldn't help but feeling satisfied. He kissed her, kissed her passionately as the desire of biting that lip the way she had just done was driving him crazy. He tasted her tongue, swallowing her moans, feeling her parting her lips further to welcome him fully.

He felt her wrapping her arms around his neck and he couldn't help but grab her, hold her, push her body against his, her breasts agains this chest, her face against his. There, for the very first time, he hated her. He hated her for being so fucking irresistible, he hated her for wanting to take her right there, make her scream his name until the walls fell down, he just couldn't help but hate her.

"I love you, you know that, right?" he had to pull away to stop himself from going farther. Regina buried her face in his neck and breathed him in:  
"I know," she smiled "and I love you too."

* * *

Days passed by and Regina and Robin were a a happy couple from two weeks. Regina had never felt so happy, ever. Simply waking up every morning in his arms, after having made love all night, and see his smile was enough to make her smile all day. She felt like the happiest woman in the world and Robin… well, Robin was just the perfect man, everything she had dreamed of and wanted since she was a child.

"Good evening, Locksley!" she exclaimed with a smile, entering the door with a lot of shopping bags. Robin was immediately there to give her a hand but not before, while returning her smile, placing a soft kiss on her lips. "hmmm, that smells delicious, what are you cooking?"

"Tomato sauce. Wanna taste?" they put the bags on the kitchen table and Robin begun to put the things she had bought in the fridge and on the shelves.

"Yes, please!" she giggled, approaching the spoon Robin was holding near her mouth. "Yummy! Just add some hot pepper and it'll be perfect!"

"Hmm, I knew you liked it hot but…" he winked and he started laughing like crazy.

"You're hopeless, you know that?" she smiled one more time and put the milk and eggs in the fridge.

"You bought ice cream?" he asked, noticing the other stuff in the bag.

"Yes. Chocolate, hazelnut and pistachio."

"Mh, I bought the cream. We could put it on ice cream and… not only on that." It wasn't a joke like the one before, this time he looked straight in her eyes, a look that made her melt like butter.

God, they made love almost every night and he still had the desire of exploring her body like the first time. It gave her goosebumps every time he talked to her like that.

"Maybe… after dinner…" she approached him slowly while she blushed and nervously bit the inside of her cheek. She was still that teenager at her first crush he had known and fell in love with the very first moment he saw her; he was sure she would never change and that was exactly why he knew for sure that he would never had enough of that woman.

As soon as she put a hand on his chest, he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her to him, kissing her passionately. It was a deep kiss, the kind that make you lose your mind, that he himself was forced to interrupt: "I have to tell you something."

"Mh-hmm." she breathed, without even really paying attention. She needed to kiss him, to feel his lips on hers because, by then, it had become a drug to her, it was an addiction.

"Tomorrow…" and shit, _shit, _he was damn distracted by that body that she continued to press against his. He wasn't going to control himself any longer if he didn't stop, not with her, so he just blurted it out: "Tomorrow my mother comes to town."

Those simple words were enough to make her pull away from him, completely, immediately, as if she had just awakened from a beautiful dream.

"What? Tomorrow? Your mother? But… I don't know her!"

Robin chuckled: "Yeah, that's the point, I want you to meet her." Regina's heart began to beat wildly in her chest. It had never happened before, a similar situation: Victor had lost both of his parents when he was very young and had spent most of his life with his uncle, his mother's brother, who died too when he was just 21. Regina had always thought that the lack of a maternal figure in his life was probably one of the reasons of his behavior, of his misogyny, of him thinking and treating women like objects.

"I—I…"

"What is it, my love?" he stroked her arms gently.

Regina had always had the wrong example of a mother: Cora was tough, not a thing moved her, not even the tears of a four years old baby girl who already felt unloved and unwanted. She remembered she had spent most of her life wondering what having a normal mother would be like, a loving, kind one. She wondered if, every night, before she slept, she would kiss her forehead and tuck her in; if in the mornings, when she was barely awake, she would prepare her breakfast with a beautiful, loving smile on her lips; if, once grown, she would understand every problem and be by her side to fix it, no matter what she believed in, she would still be her little girl.

Regina had always had the wrong example of a mother, but maybe, somewhere out there, the mother of her dreams existed, for someone.

"I don't think I can do it, Robin, really."

He watched her slipping away from his touch and sitting on one of the chairs in the kitchen. The smile he loved so much had disappeared from her angelic face, and also her cheeks were not as red as they were when Robin's body was against hers.

Regina had always told him, during the months they had lived together as friends, about her mother Cora, about how cold she was. Of course she wouldn't focus on details and he didn't insist, because he saw the way her face darkened everytime they brought the topic up and she had to recall those memories; but still, she had managed to tell something that made him want to get up and yell at the ceiling, speak to that God who had never been there for a woman that deserved his help more than anything.

How could it be that no one had been able to give her at least half of the love he felt for her? Christ, how had she been able to go on with that life? In spite of everything that happened to her… She was truly the strongest, bravest woman he had ever met and, in that exact moment, Robin swore to himself that he wouldn't spend a second of his life without showing her the infinite love he felt for her.

"Hey…" he sat down in front of her and took her hand, bringing his deep blue eyes in hers. "I know what you've been through, but you must believe me when I say that my mother will love you. She already does." he smiled "She's the sweetest, most understanding and loving person that you can meet. I… I tell her about you everyday, my love, you have to believe me. I've never hidden anything from her, I could always talk to her about everything cause I knew she would understand. I know you haven't had this opportunity and I can't change the past, as far as I'd love to." he saw her eyes shining in tiny tears again. She hadn't been crying for weeks and, damn, now he was making her again. "But I can change the present, and I swear I'll work hard everyday to make sure that even your future will be full of love, cuddles and tenderness." he managed to make her smile and it was like breathing again after so long. "I love you, Regina. I love you with all my heart and my mother knows this more than anyone else." he smiled back "She knows from the very first day I saw you, when I spoke on the phone with her, about you; she knows of the horrible things you've been through with that son of a bitch, I told her the day after I took you away from him; she knows since I started dating Daniels and I told her that I hoped she could make me forget about you, about how much I already loved you. And when, two weeks ago, I finally told her of us, that we were finally together, that we loved each other like idiots and I had never felt so happy… You know what was her answer?" Regina shook her head lightly, as a tear of pure emotion escaped her eyes at his words "Robin Jonathan Locksley, you are just like your father, aren't you? You never listen to me and when I'm right you forget to admit it." he imitated his mother's voice and Regina giggled. Yes, that was definitely his favorite sound. "She knew from day one that what I had for you was true love, from the day I told her about you the first time we met. My mother has been married to my father for fifty-five long years and, when she lost him, she felt like a piece of her soul had died with him. He was the love of her life, and she knew it from the moment she saw him. She's always been good with that sort of things."

Regina smiled: maybe it was too late for them to spend fifty-five years of their life together, but they would have surely spent every last one of their breaths to love each other.

"Do you really think I won't end up disappointing her expectations?" she sighed.

"Don't be ridiculous. She'll love you, I promise." he didn't let go of her hand until he saw her smiling. Regina nodded, finally relieved: "So" she chuckled "where are you going to take me and Angela Locksley tomorrow night?"

**thoughts? **


	13. Chapter 13

**wohoo, it's been more than a month, I'm so sorry y'all! thank you for following and reviewing this story. It's amazing the support I'm getting, especially on twitter. Thank you so so much! I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

Regina was nervous. Robin had told her to wait at home that afternoon, while he was going to take Angela at the airport. She had just nodded and smiled unsurely but she couldn't help her heart from beating wildly. She was anxious, she hadn't felt like that since she graduated. It never happened before, she hadn't had such experience, it was all so new… Robin. That whole situation. Their whole relationship had brought her so many firsts.

She kept looking in the mirror, wondering if that dark blue dress she had chosen was too much. She didn't want Angela to think she did that just for the occasion, to make a good impression on her; the only thing she wanted was to be herself and look natural. She didn't have to worry though, everything she did was real, born out of love.

The dress was tight, just above the knee, one of those dresses that, according to Robin, made her look like a _really really sexy secretary._ She smiled at that thought as she put on a simple gold wire necklace and a bit of perfume. She had pulled back two strands of hair, she was absolutely professional and perfect for the occasion, but… ready? Nope. At all.

"Honey, we're home!" she heard Robin's voice, accompanied by the sound of the door closing. Then she heard a second one, a feminine one, which had to be Angela's:  
"Oh my goodness, Robin, this house is completely different from what I remembered, I knew it needed a woman's touch." it was a sweet voice, which Regina couldn't help but smile at. It was there that she realized: everything was going to be alright, Robin was right, she had nothing to fear.

"My love?" he called her, again.

"I'm here." she walked into the room with a shy smile and a slight blush Robin knew by heart. His heart started pounding in his chest, as one of the most beautiful smiles Regina had ever seen made its way on his face. The two most important women in his life were finally face to face and what Robin felt was… indescribable.

"Hello, Mrs. Locksley" she held out her hand and felt her cheeks burning.

Angela Locksley was definitely a beautiful woman in her seventies. She had slightly curly, white hair that didn't come to reach her shoulders, hazel eyes and her lips were constantly curved in that polite, loving smile. She was wearing a yellow dress for the occasion, and white shoes. She was the kind of woman you smile to, without even knowing why, which, in all honestly, her son had inherited in full.

"Oh, for God's sake, dear, come here and hug me immediately!" Robin bit his lip, trying to stop himself from bursting into a loud laugh, while the love of his life was literally crushed in his mother's hug. "Please, call me Angela. Robin told me a lot about you, he said you were beautiful, of course, actually he did nothing but talk about how beautiful you were" she laughed, and Robin blushed slightly "from the first time he met you he wouldn't stop telling me how beautiful you—"

"okay mom! she got it!" he had to look down not to blush some more and Regina giggled.

"I'm sorry darling. What I meant was… I knew you were beautiful, but not _this _much! You are truly wonderful."

"Thank you so much, Mrs. Lock— Angela." she smiled sweetly as Robin came closer and put an arm around Regina's waist, welcoming her in a warm embrace. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips and smiled.

"My mother will bombard you with question at any moment, she does it with everyone, including the postman." he whispered against her lips, making sure Angela couldn't hear him. Regina smiled. "so we better get out of here, so you can drown everything in the wine." he kissed her again, then returned his eyes to his mother and took Regina's hand:

"so… let's go!"

* * *

They spent a wonderful evening. Angela didn't make as many questions as Robin was expecting, which was strange. Although, he knew she was dying to, she was just trying to control herself not to scare off the woman her son loved.  
She could say she was able to read Regina Mills like an open book. She surely was a strong woman, who had been through a lot in her life, who had suffered more than she could ever imagine, but she had no doubt when she heard her saying that she was completely, utterly, unconditionally in love with her son. Not to mention that she never missed an opportunity to prove that with every gesture, but without ostentation.

The thing Angela liked the most about Regina was surely her ability to do everything naturally, spontaneously, with the innocence of a young girl at her first boyfriend: every time Robin caressed her, or put his hands on hers, or kissed her sweetly in front of his mother, Regina blushed. It wasn't typical of the girls Robin used to bring home.

"your son saved my life several times, I owe him everything." she concluded the sentence with a sip of wine, while Angela smiled, with her chin on her knuckles, listening carefully to their story like a child listens to a fairytale.

"Robin always tells me about" she took a long breath before continuing: "the way you changed his mind and turned his world upside down since you came into his life. He used not to believe in long term relationships, even though he had the living proof right in front of his eyes" she pointed at herself, making the couple smile "but it was just because he never found that one person whom he was sure he was gonna spend the rest of his days with. And every time he looks at you, dear, I seem to see Clay. He looks at you the same way my husband used to look at me and, believe me, I remember that look and the way it made me feel, very well."

Robin took Regina's hand and intertwined their fingers.

"He loves you, sweetie. And I know you think _he_ saved your life, but believe me, you saved my baby too, on so many levels. You gave him hope, you made him believe in love, which is something that he'd never had."

Regina turned to look at Robin and found him smiling, with that sparkle in his blue eyes typical of him. That was the spark that never failed to give her goosebumps.

"I love him too, very much." she whispered, burying her chocolate pools in his blue ones. She looked down for a second and, both Robin and Angela, saw the way her face suddenly darkened: "I'm only sorry that… well… I can not… give him the family he's always wanted."

Robin immediately opened his mouth to say something, but Angela preceded him: "Dear, you don't have to worry about this. Family can also consist of two people, believe me. And, if it's true love… it's just a perfect family, the most beautiful, the rarest one." Regina looked up and found Robin's eyes again. She got lost in them for a long time and it was as if, right then, she could read his soul. She knew how much he wanted a child, probably as much as she wanted it too, and the thought of not being able to give him one tormented her every night, when she closed her eyes and felt his protective arms wrapping around her in a warm embrace.

It was torture, a feeling that would never leave her. She had chosen not to tell him because she knew he would have said something like "it doesn't matter, I love you and I want to be with you", and the argument would have ended there because she would have smiled at his words and given him a tender, delicate kiss.

But now that she finally had the chance to talk about it… in all honesty, it felt good.

"Robin once told me about how much he'd love to have children…" damn it, she had tears in her eyes. Again. She couldn't cry, not there, she was gonna ruin everything.

"My love," he took her hand again, forcing her to turn around and face him, eyes in eyes "I don't care, really. All I want is you, I would give up anything to spend the rest of my life with you."

"You'd miss the chance of having children just to be with me, Robin? Honestly, what do you earn from all this _crap_? I can't do nothing but annoy you with my past, every move you make you always have to remember what I've been through, I bet you can't even be yourself when we make love" the tears were about to come out of her eyes and she couldn't stop them, it was too late. "how many times did you have to hold yourself back, fearing my reaction?" Robin didn't reply. Saying that he loved her wouldn't have helped, right? Because she already knew that. "God, I've been so selfish to think this story could work." she stood up from her chair, straightened her dress and took her purse "excuse me." she said before disappearing in the crowd.

She wasn't going anywhere but in the bathroom, Robin knew that. But still, he felt like something was trying to take her away from him.  
God, _God_, how had they come to this?

He wanted to follow her, but his mother stopped him: "Allow me to take care of this, dear." they looked at each other for a long instant before Robin could nod and convince himself that his mother knew what she was doing. After all, she was one of the two women he loved the most.

* * *

When Angela Locksley walked into the luxurious bathroom of the restaurant in which her son had taken her to dinner to know her future daughter in law better, she found the aforementioned woman crying, trying in every way to control the flow of her tears in order to not ruin the makeup that she had put on with such precision and care.

She knew Regina was feeling like an idiot for running away like that for nonsense, but she also knew she was tired, tired of avoiding the inevitable.

"Honey?" when she heard Angela's voice, she couldn't help but let go another tear:

"Oh, Angela, why did you— You didn't have to, really. Everything's alright. It's just… a moment."

"No, it's not. You know that it's not." she approached her, taking the handkerchief from her hands and, slowly, retraced the path that Regina was making to dry her tears.

Regina found herself looking into those dark eyes, so different from the ones of the man she loved so much, as she tried, in vain, to stop crying. "Clay and I have wanted a child for a very long time, for fifteen long years of marriage, actually. We had lost hope, perhaps a child wasn't in our cards. We stopped worrying about it, behaving as if our lives depended on it, and it was then…" she made a little pause and Regina noticed how she had to blink several times to hold back the tears. "it was then that we conceived our beloved Robin." she returned the beautiful smile that had taken place on Regina's face. "you see, dear, I don't want to give you false hope, because I personally believe that is the cruelest thing of all. But maybe, things work out when they're supposed to. Maybe it's all about timing." when she made sure Regina had stopped crying, she threw the hanky in the trash and took a clean one from her beg, wetting it with cold water. She lightly dabbed under her eyes "and even if it doesn't happen, darling, believe me, you should not underestimate that son of a good woman" she giggled "often, in life, you're faced with choices and my son had to choose between having children with a woman that clearly wasn't the right one for him, and living happily ever after with the love of his life. Guess which one he chose."

Regina slightly blushed, but smiled anyway. Her heart beat faster every time Angela referred to her as _the love of her son's life. _It could only mean that it was the way Robin called her whenever he spoke to his mother, and she couldn't help but feel honored.

"Honey, don't ever underestimate the decisions that Robin makes. It takes him a lifetime to make one, of course, but when he does, he doesn't go back. He loves you, he loves you more than anything and anyone in this world. You have to trust him when he tells you, I know my boy." she smiled one last time before throwing the wet hanky away, too.

There, she was perfect again. Beautiful, as nothing had happened. As if her face had never seen a tear. Angela was a real expert in this. "Come on, now go to him. Knowing him, he'll be dying to get into this bathroom and kiss you."

They laughed together, then Regina nodded: "thank you so much, Angela."

"It's nothing, dear."

* * *

When they returned home, Robin helped Angela to arrange the guest room. He gave her some blankets, clean sheets, a comfortable pillow and made sure she had everything she needed. Both him and Regina said goodnight to her with a kiss on each cheek, then, when they were finally alone, Robin said nothing but stared deep into the eyes of the woman he loved. They stayed like that, eyes locked, for what seemed to be a lifetime. And then, he walked away, straight into their room, without a single word.

Regina was worried; after she had run away at the restaurant they hadn't had a chance to talk alone, apart from an "are you okay?" and a simple "yes" as an answer from him, they got in the car and headed back home.

They had to talk, he still needed to clarify several things before going to sleep.

"Robin?" she whispered shyly, entering what was now _their _bedroom. She walked in and closed the door behind her, leaning against its wooden surface. "I think… we should talk about it."

"no" he simply said, shrugging. He was standing in front of the bed, his hands on his hips and looked rather exhausted. Was he angry? At her? Damn, she shouldn't have said those things. "I'm tired of talking, Regina. For months I've been telling you the same things, I showed you my heart, I exposed my feelings to you and you just… don't believe me. Words aren't enough anymore." she noticed how he was walking towards her, slowly, very damn slowly. "You want to see me be myself?" his hands were suddenly on her hips, pulling her against him. Regina's heart sank and she gasped for air when she felt his hands on her back, caressing her shoulders, then straight down her arse, just to arrive to the ends of her blue dress. He kissed her, he kissed her with so much passion that Regina had to suffocate a moan in his mouth as she trapped his blond hair in her fists. He kissed her with so much passion that she forgot where she was, what had happened before and what was happening at the moment. She was so damn lost in that kiss that the house could have crumbled around them and she wouldn't mind, as long as she could feel his lips against hers.

He pulled away for a moment and suddenly his mouth was on Regina's neck, devouring it as if her skin had the flavor of his favorite food. He felt him lifting the soft, blue fabric of the dress, until it was just above her groin, as much as he needed to caress her thighs, as if he was inviting her to tighten them around his waist.

And so she did: in a second, Regina was in his arms, pinned against the door, just like their first time. This time, though, as she wanted, he wasn't going to hold himself back, he would give rise to all the fantasies he had had with her, he would let go and whisper in her ear just how much he wanted her, every dirty little detail, every sensation, explicitly.

He walked to the bed and put her down on the mattress. He looked straight into her eyes; it was dark in the room but she could still recognize that spark in his deep blue ocean that made her shiver.

He quickly got rid of his shoes, unbuttoned his shirt and threw it somewhere in the room. It took his time to undo the belt of his jeans, enjoying the way Regina's pupils dilated at every inch of his skin he uncovered. He wasn't going to take off those jeans, not this time.

"do you really want me to let go while I make love to you tonight, my love?" she felt his hands raising her dress as much as possible, then he grabbed the waistband of her panties and pulled it down, slowly, but not too much. Regina strangled a moan:

"Yes. Please."

"are you sure? Because there won't be cuddles, nor tenderness, hesitations or pausing. I'll take you here and now because I want you, I want you like crazy, Regina, I can't think of anything else since you put on this god damn dress." he took her bottom lip between his teeth and traced its outlines, feeling her skin electrifying every second more. "So I'm gonna ask you once again, my love." his tongue caressed what his teeth had just tasted, then he smiled. _That. Smile. _

"Do you really want me to let go while I make love to you, tonight?"

God, she wanted him. She wanted him then and there, she didn't want cuddles, nor tenderness, she didn't want to hesitate or wait a second longer. She didn't want him to stop in the middle of the pleasure just because he was afraid of her reaction. No more obstacles, he didn't have to hold back anymore.

While Robin's hand slipped inside her panties, just to make sure she was really comfortable with the whole situation, Regina moaned a "yes" and arched her spine to meet his touch. "Please, yes." she reiterated as Robin brought his eyes in hers, half closed. He was determined now, and so was she. She was ready.

Quickly, he took off that thin layer of fabric that was the only obstacle left between them. He looked at her one last time, before aligning his hips with Regina's and finally entering her.

Their eyes closed in unison and Regina's lips opened wide to let out a soft moan. The fabric of his trousers rubbed against her body and it did nothing but turn her on even more. It was all so quick, intense, passionate, dictated by the heat of the moment, there was nothing calculated, nothing rational, as sex should be.

His pace was irregular, he alternated strong and hard thrusts to lazier and sweeter ones, which he took advantage of to cherish and worship the rest of her body. He raised her dress —which was nothing but a layer of blue cloth rolled up above her breasts— a little more and took a nipple between his teeth, then he licked, sucked and finally kissed it, watching the way her spine arched as she begged for more.

She wanted more, of his tongue, everywhere. She needed to feel on every inch of her, and he understood it when she scratched his back, down until she met the waistband of his trousers, slipped inside of them, under the boxers and sank her nails in his arse. She could feel every movement of his pelvis against her palms and, as he started thrusting harder, she dug her fingers into his flesh, while a loud moan filled the room.

"More" she asked when she felt so close to her climax that she could no longer tolerate a slow and gentle pace "I want more."

Robin groaned in her ear before leaning on his palms to look at her. "You have no idea how beautiful you are right now, have you?" he whispered softly. And it was true: her naked body in the moonlight, fully beaded with sweat, her hair a complete disaster —but the kind of a sexy disaster that he liked so much. "I move inside of you, I have full control of your body and yet, I want more. I can't get enough of you, Regina, you're driving me insane." he hadn't stop thrusting for a single moment. She had sunk her head in the pillows, her neck arched upward, her mouth opened widely and her eyes half closed. She was in heaven, with him. "I want you all night, I want to take you in every possible way." Regina bit her lip so hard that a small drop of blood touched the tip of her tongue:  
"Yes, please, yes." a smile made its way on Robin's face as he started thrusting even harder. Regina was shuddering, moaning, squirming beneath him; she closed her arms around his neck and that was a clear signal to her: she always covered her face when she came, usually burying it in his neck or his chest. But he was not gonna let her, not this time. She didn't have to hold back.

"Look at me." he whispered, struggling to bring her eyes in his. Regina had to stop herself from crying out his name again as Robin, with one last thrust, touched the most sensitive spot inside of her. "Look at me while you cum, my love. Let yourself go with me."

"Robin, don't— I'm about to—" she was about to collapse, that was the truth: she struggled to keep her eyes opened and look at him, at the way his deep blue ocean filled with pleasure, with lust, with that spark that made her wish for things she was so ashamed of. It was just too much for her. She had to explode, explode around him.

And so she did, just like him, who came a moment later inside of her with a deep groan. Not just their bodies were intertwined, but also their eyes, locked, chocolate and ocean.

He took her face in his hands and kissed her with so much passion that made her want to start it all over again, though she was still shaking from the previous orgasm.

She managed to turn over the situation: now she was on top of him and her tongue was still in Robin's mouth.

"I want you again" she moaned against his lips, feeling him hardening again inside of her. "Take me again, take me all night, take me in all the possible ways, Locksley. I'm yours." and her smile confirmed it.  
There it was, his warrior queen, the strong, amazing woman he was madly in love with. There she was, again, after far too long, she was back and would never leave.

She was his.

**thoughts? **


	14. Chapter 14

**sorry I'm late.**

* * *

Waking up at almost eleven on Sunday mornings wasn't usual for them. But after a kind of night like the one they had just spent, they surely deserved some rest. They were naked, tangled up in a tight, warm embrace, barely covered by a thin baby blue sheet that reminded Regina of Robin's eyes. The same eyes that opened up first, to find the woman he loved laying right next to him. She was giving him her back but, even though he couldn't see it, he was sure she had a huge smile printed on her lips. He felt the sweet smell of her skin tickling his nostrils, so he allowed himself to delicately kiss her shoulder, her back, her neck. His kisses were feather light but they still were enough to wake her up: he felt her turning to face him, with her beautifully brown eyes still closed, just to hug him tighter and bury her face in his neck.

"I'll let you sleep some more, let me just check if my mother set the kitchen on fire." he giggled, kissing her hair.

"Please don't go. Stay with me a little, you know I like being cuddled in the morning." she said so sweetly and innocently that he just couldn't say no. She kissed his neck, loving the feeling of the warmth of his skin against her lips, then she finally opened her eyes to meet his. "Good morning." she smiled, kissing his lips once, twice, four times.

"'Morning, my love." he hugged her tighter "You should keep sleeping, you know? We… kinda lost control last night."

"_We?"_ she laughed "Robin, three times."

"Three wonderful times." he closed his eyes and, for a moment, he allowed himself to remember all the beautiful things and feelings they lived the night before. Definitely one of the best nights he had spent in his life, with the woman he loved more than anything. They had fallen asleep around three, completely spent and sated, full, completed.

"I feel tired."

"Sleep, my love. I can handle my mother." her eyes immediately flashed open at his words, as if a thunder had just shaken her and she'd lost every chance to rest peacefully.

_Shit. _

"Oh, God, no!" she said, burying her face under the pillow. Robin couldn't help but giggle as she, for the millionth time, proved herself a baby:  
"What?"

"Your mother! Do you think she heard us?"

"Well, let's just say you weren't exactly the quietest." he smiled, caressing the naked skin of her back.

"Oh God, oh God!" she said, her voice muffled by the pillow "I won't ever be able to look her in the eyes again."

Robin giggled: "Don't be silly. Believe it or not, my mother knows what sex is. She knows we're adults, we're old enough to make love, and I'm sure she's happy we made up for last night at dinner."

She came out, her face completely red: "It was a horrible idea, I knew it. We should have waited, and—"

"Oh trust me, with that blue dress you wore you should thank God I've been able to resist till we were home." he saw her blushing, then smiling as he leaned closer to kiss her. "Sleep, my love, sleep some more." he held her in his warm embrace until he made sure she was sleeping again, peacefully.

He put his boxers on, his robe, then opened the door, just to find a wonderful smell waiting for him, coming from the kitchen. Hmm… apple pie. And… cookies. He walked in the room where his mother was waiting for him, busy at putting more cookies in the oven.

A cake, a tart, pancakes and muffins were already on the table.

"Is the president joining us for breakfast?" he joked, his voice still sleepy.

Angela Locksley giggled: "Well, I think you guys need to eat after what happened last night." she winked at him and Robin's cheek turned a bright shade of red.

"You…"

"I just imagined that you made up last night, after we came home. Just like me and your father used to do."

"Oh please, save the details." Angela laughed as she sat next to her son and took a pancake from the plate.

He couldn't lie to his mother, but that wonderful smile he couldn't get off his face wasn't helping him at all. He was happy, the happiest man alive probably.

"So… do you like Boston? It's better than Atlanta, isn't it?"

"Not particularly. Atlanta is less chaotic and people don't look like they've just escaped from an asylum." Robin giggled. Yeah, it's something her mother would say.

"I'd love to visit it with Regina someday."

"Oh yes, you should! I'm sure she'd love it." before he could nod to agree, they heard the door of the bedroom opening. Regina came out shyly, wearing her white robe and, hopefully, the underwear.

"Morning, everyone!" she exclaimed, still finding a bit hard to look at Angela the way she used to do_ before_.

"My love, I told you to sleep some more…"

"I know but I woke up again and you weren't there, so…" she blushed, shrugging as she gave him a small smile. Her eyes fell on the table and what she saw made her immediately want to lick her lips. "My God, Angela, it looks delicious!"

"Please, have a seat dear. Take whatever you want, I made everything for you, with love." she smiled sweetly and Regina's heart sank. No woman had ever treated her with such care, as if she was… a daughter she loved. In Angela Locksley she had found the mother she had never had and always wanted, the sweet and kind person that prepares you breakfast and wishes you a good day as she greets you with a smile every morning, instead of the usual criticism about her life choices.

"Thank you." she just said, before biting a biscuit.

"It's nothing." Angela smiled. "So, today is a beautiful day and I really, really need to buy some new clothes." she said, all excited "I was thinking that maybe we could go shopping this afternoon. I know we still have one whole week but… what do you say Regina?"

"Absolutely." she said promptly, ignoring Robin that was squeezing her hand under the table, as if he wanted to stop her from saying a word. "It'll be fun, right, Robin?"

* * *

"You have no idea what you just agreed to do." he said in all seriousness, walking into their room already dressed up, while she was still in her underwear. Regina looked at him with a puzzled look printed on her face and he quickly explained himself: "My mother spends whole hours in a shop, she tries on two thousand dresses and ends up picking just one. Trust me, I know that woman, it's exhausting keeping up with her when she goes shopping."

Regina laughed: "Well, I understand her. It's just a girly thing. It takes time to buy a dress, you know?" she said as she zipped her skirt "Maybe for you men it's easier because your clothes are all the same but—"

"Okay, now you're scaring me. You're saying the same exact things she says!"

She laughed again, then she slowly approached him, until their lips were barely an inch away:  
"Don't be a baby. At some point we might… leave your mother in some random shop as I go buying some new underwear. I ran out of panties, you know." she smirked "And you may come with me." she saw him biting his bottom lip and she blushed, but she continued anyway: "And I may try on something for you, so you can give me your opinion." she traced a path of soft kisses from his ear down to his chin. Robin moaned, then suffocated a giggle:  
"Okay, you got me at _new underwear._" he smiled "But promise me you'll try on some babydolls too."

Regina returned his smile, then left a big kiss on his cheek and nodded: "I promise."

Yes, he thought, it could be fun.

* * *

Robin was right: they had only been able to visit three shops and Angela had spent at least half a hour in each of them, without buying absolutely anything. Regina was amused, while Robin was feeling like a child forced to follow her mother doing shopping. He would have much preferred a walk in the park.

At some point, Regina took his hand, smiled at him and, with her usual innocence, she dragged him to the changing rooms. The smile on Robin's face was able to light up the whole city after a blackout, but he had completely misunderstood her intentions: "Wait here." she said before disappearing behind the curtains. He didn't even notice what she had taken from the stands as he was totally busy fantasizing about all the things they could do in that stupid changing room, behind the curtain that was dividing him from her naked body.

"You like it?" she walked out of it almost naked, covered in a simple, thin red bikini that looked amazing against her olive skin. Robin had to steady himself against the column not to fall and bite his tongue not to curse. She was beautiful and, in that moment, he swore it was like he was looking at her for the first time.

"I thought that, maybe, one day, we could go on a vacation. To the beach. What do you think? You like it?" she asked again.

"Oh… yes." he managed to mumble. Regina giggled, turning around to show him the back. It was then that he noticed: the bottom left much little to the imagination, as the one she had tried on was more like a thong than a normal bikini. He normally would appreciate such view but… she was going to wear it in public. On a beach. With other people. "But... maybe you should buy a swimsuit." was that… _redness _on his cheeks? Regina had to keep herself from laughing out loud.

"I don't remember you wanting me to wear a _swimsuit _in the bedroom."

"That's because that show was reserved for my eyes and my eyes only. On the beach there will be… people."

She finally allowed herself to laugh, then she threw her arms around his neck. "I'm only interesting in having _your_ attention, not that of the others. And, at the end of the day, the one who's gonna come back home with this ass… will be you, Locksley."

In spite of his jealousy, he was glad she finally accepted her body for what it was and she felt confident in showing it. It meant that she finally considered herself the beautiful woman that she truly really was and he couldn't help but being happy about it.

"You should take a blue one, too." he whispered, bringing a lock of her hair behind her ear. "It's a color that, as you may have noticed last night, drives me insane on you." with that low, deep tone he pulled away from her, allowing her to close the curtains and change herself.  
It was then and only then that Regina Mills was able to catch her breath again.

She only came out when she made sure Robin wasn't there. She had a thing or two left to do and he… he just couldn't know. Not even Angela. At least not yet.

She walked in a very particular shop, as she took her phone from the pocket and composed a number.  
"Rothman." said the voice from the other side.

"Linda? It's Regina. I need to see you, we have to talk."

"Victor again?"

"Yes. I wanna visit him in prison."

**dum dum dum! you may want to read the next chapter before killing me.**


	15. Chapter 15

A week passed since Regina had called her lawyer. She was more than determined to visit Victor in prison; she was ready to see him again after a long time, she could do it, she was confident. She had gained a strength and a self-confidence that she didn't remember she'd ever had, and all thanks to the man she loved.

"My love," Robin whispered, approaching her from behind, immediately wrapping his strong arms around her as she was still preparing lunch. "Are you coming with me this afternoon? My mother wants to go for a stroll and I wanted to take advantage of that to buy her the best ice cream in town." he breathed her in, before leaving a sweet kiss on the soft skin of her neck. "Tomorrow, say… lunch time, I'll take her to the airport. And finally you'll be totally, completely, absolutely mine." he made her smile and shiver at the same time. It had been a week since the last time they made love; they missed each other more than they could express, the desire was so intense. But Regina didn't want to give in. Not after their last experience. Absolutely. She didn't want Angela to hear everything again, the first time had been embarrassing enough.

"Hmm… so you've missed me."

"Like mad." his hands wandered all over her body, slipped under her shirt, then they went up again, until he met the soft fabric of her black lace bra. Regina released a moan as she quickly left herself go against his body, relaxing her head on his shoulder. She let him touch her, cause, God, she missed his touch, she missed it way too much. Angela had just walked into the bathroom to take a shower, they had at least twenty minutes.

She felt his hands massaging her breasts, while he sweetly whispered in her hear how much and _all the ways_ he had missed her.

"Robin, the bed…"

"No." he breathed and she couldn't help herself from moaning again and closing her eyes. "I want you here, now." he unbuttoned his jeans quickly and let them fall to his feet. He lifted her skirt so fast he didn't even let her the time to realize what was happening. It was all so… fast, so passionate. She smiled as his hand threaded inside her panties, caressing and circling her center.

"You're so damn wet, you know that, right?"

She nodded, feeling her face burning in flames. She was so sweet as she tried to hide her face in his neck; he wanted her. He wanted all of her.

"Take me." she whispered so low he was sure he had dreamt it, before kissing his earlobe. She didn't have to ask twice. He teased her clit one last time, making sure she was truly ready for him, then he moved her panties aside and slipped inside of her from behind, feeling her bum firmly pressing against her hips.

They moaned together and he observed the way her spine arched at every thrust. Regina felt him moving faster inside of her and she wanted to scream, tell him she wanted more,_ oh, so much more_, that he was touching just the right spot —_oh, yes, right there, _say his name over and over again until she reached her climax. But she couldn't do any of that and they both knew that.

Robin knew how sensitive Reina was and how much she needed to give voice to her needs so, as he made her walk a few steps forward until she was pressed against the cold wall, he put a hand over her mouth, inviting her to rest her head on his shoulder again and to relax. But it wasn't easy, Regina was still tensed, every thrust was like tasting the edge and not being able to enjoy it fully, she felt as if she was about to combust.

"Robin… oh…" she managed to whisper as Robin's fingers tangled up in her dark hair, pulling her head back, her face next to his. He had free access to her neck, to her smooth skin that was practically yelling him to suck, bite and lick every inch of it, he couldn't just ignore that desire: he assaulted her neck with his lips and tongue, then he sucked, hard, leaving what soon would have become a huge, red, way too embarrassing mark.

Regina fisted her hands in his hair, bit her lip so hard she made it bleed, then pulled her mouth to his. "I'm about to… Mmfh" yes, she had yelled and yes, he had managed to stop her in time, swallowing every word with his mouth. He brought her face back next to his and they could finally stare into each other's eyes and smile as she begged, whispering, to _please, don't stop _because she was _oh, so close_.

Every thrust was hard and deep, but at the same time he had quickened his pace in a way that drove her insane.

"Let go, my love. Come. Come for me." and so she did, in what seemed an eternity to her, as he felt her clenching around him. That was probably all he needed to throw his head back and moan out, the quietest he could, spurting all of himself inside of her.

Regina supported herself against the wall in front of her to maintain her balance. She was barely standing on her own feet, how could she even try to act as nothing ever happened?  
"God…"  
"Yeah." he smirked, as he buttoned his jeans and watched her hardly catching her breath. She was so beautiful and he was so happy he had just pleasured her, treated her like the queen she actually was, worshipped her body as much as he could. That was exactly what she deserved, every day of her life. "I suggest you to pull your skirt back down, before I bend you over this table and take you again."

Regina couldn't help but shiver as she watched his face contracting in the dirtiest of smirks and she immediately obeyed. He approached her again and his smirk turned into a smile that she returned without hesitating.  
"Tomorrow." she whispered, kissing him softly.

"Tomorrow."

* * *

Regina had been trying to cover up that hickey all the morning, but it was too late, Angela Locksley had a special eye for details and she surely had noticed that one. Or maybe Regina was just being paranoid. Yeah, definitely. Way too much.

While she was still in front of the mirror, in their bedroom, trying hard to cover it with the foundation, she asked herself is she was truly ready to face it all over again. She knew she had to see Victor again at some point, she couldn't just hope to erase him from her life once and for all, even though that was all she wanted. But seeing him again today was something she wanted to do. She had finally made a decision, for the first time in her life she was sure about something about that man. She wasn't going to change her mind.

"Me and mom are going, you sure you don't wanna come with us?" Robin's voice startled her a bit, but she couldn't stop herself from smiling.

"I'm sure. I may be too busy covering what you've left on me." she glared at him through the mirror and he giggled.  
"Hmm… I'm sorry?" he shrugged his shoulders.

Regina smiled: it was truly impossible even just pretending to be angry at him.

"So how are you gonna spend this lonely afternoon?"

"I think I'll…" she swallowed the lump in her throat and tried to keep a quiet tone, hoping with every ounce of her being that he wouldn't notice she was lying. She was a horrible liar. Especially when it came to lying to _him_. "I'll just check some tests and take a nap. It's been an exhausting week."

Robin simply nodded. He understood.

"I'm going then. See you tonight, my love." Regina turned around and finally their lips met again, briefly. "I love you."  
"I love you too." there was an untypical hesitation in her voice. One that she simply couldn't control. Lying to him was the thing she hated to do the most. She had never _ever_ lied to him and the only thought made her stomach turn upside down with disgust, but this time she had to. She was gonna to tell him at some point, anyway, but, until then, she just had to pretend.

She made sure Angela and Robin were gone for at least fifteen minutes, then she got in the car and drove to the prison where Victor was staying. The sky was gray, as if the world wanted to let her know that it understood and respected her mood.

As she wrote her name on the visitor's list, she felt the same exact anxiety she used to feel every time she came back home and knew Victor was waiting for her. That kind of feeling she hadn't felt in four months.

"Your name, please." said one of the guards, a woman, bringing her back to reality.

Regina shook her head, then tried to smile and, with a calm, polite tone she whispered: "Regina Mills."

"Are you Mr. Hadler's attorney?"

"No, I'm…" she looked down for a brief moment "I'm his wife." she bit her tongue and she felt like she was about to die. It was a horrible feeling, being called like that again, after so long.

"So… you're Mrs. Hadler?"

"Yes. I— I kept my surname."

"Can I see your ID?"

"You think I'm lying? You really think someone would actually _lie _about being that son of a bitch's wife? Why would them? Too see the monster that's raped them for three years straight, that beat them up and made them feel like shit?" _Breathe, Mills, breathe._

"It's the law, ma'am, I'm sorry." Regina saw the woman in front of her mortified, petrified. God, she had exaggerated. Again.

"Sorry." she pulled the document out of her purse and saw the guard giving it a quick look, not even paying too much attention, biting her lip, as if she was truly sorry for the woman standing in front of her.

Great, someone else pitying her. Again. It'd been months and she thought all of that was finally over, but she was clearly wrong.

"Please, follow the guard. He'll lead you to your… to Mr. Hadler." Regina nodded and tried to smile, thankful that she didn't say the H-word. Regina did as she was told, she followed the man in uniform until she walked into a room where people were separated by a glass and the only way they could communicate was through what looked like a telephone receiver. That place had a horrible smell, one that she was sure was gonna haunt her for days.

She stopped in front of an empty chair and noticed another empty one on the other side of the glass, a seat that was obviously gonna be Victor's. She took a deep breath, then another. She could do that. There was a glass between them. He couldn't reach her. He couldn't hurt her anymore.

"Please, ma'am, sit down and remember he can't touch you nor talk to you if you don't want to listen, you'll just have to hang up the receiver. I'll be right here if you need me."

"Thank you." she said with a polite smile and watched him giving her his back.

When she turned to look through the glass again, she saw _him_, wearing the orange jumpsuit that was clearly what he deserved, taking a seat in front to her and immediately grabbing the receiver, as if his life depended on that.

"Regina!" he said it so loud that she could hear it anyway, even through the glass. Regina took her own receiver and slowly, carefully pressed it against her ear, her hand shaking.

"Babe, how are you?"

And then, suddenly, she started laughing: "How am I? _Babe_?" she smiled, bitterly. "I'm feeling so much better than four months ago."

"I know and I'm sorry. Trust me, I've been thinking a lot since I'm here. I understood many things and, you have to believe me, Regina, I know I did you wrong." he smiled, squeezing his fingers around the receiver so hard that his knuckles turned white. "I love you, Regina. I love you so much. I finally know that."

Okay, she was expecting anything but this.

"You don't love me. You just want to possess me, like I'm some sort of object. You have no idea what loving somebody means, Victor." she spat, so sure of herself that she frightened her own self.

"No, trust me, I do. Do you remember how happy we used to be? We had everything. I just screwed everything up when I found out about your… handicap." he clenched his jaw and Regina shivered, her heart sinking in her chest. God, she didn't want to talk about that. She wasn't ready just yet. "But I accept you, babe. Even though you can't give me a child, it's okay!" he smiled but it lasted for a moment, until his eyes landed on what Regina had been trying to cover up all the morning. "What is that?" he said, coldly, angrily.

Ah, there he was. The man he really was, the man she knew.

"None of your business."

"It is, you're still my wife, Jesus Christ, it's my business if you let someone else fuck you!" he growled "Who is he? It's that headmaster, isn't it? What was his name? Robert…"

"Robin. And I love him." she was so sure of herself, she never hesitated and she couldn't help but feel proud. Talking about Robin in front of him was not something she thought she could manage to do. "Yes, we make love and… you know what? When he touches me, when he caresses my skin, I don't wanna scream in terror. I want to moan and squirm under his hands and I let myself go like I've never done with you." she spat.

She saw him squeezing the receiver so hard in what seemed to be rage, or probably just desire of breaking the glass and call her all the possible names. He closed his eyes and inhaled, then exhaled, sharply:  
"But still, you came here. To me. It must mean something, Regina." a tiny sparkle of what seemed to be hope formed in his eyes and Regina was starting to feel nauseated. He was disgusting. "You still love me, don't you?"

"Of course not. I'm here to tell you to get an attorney, because next Monday we're gonna sit in front of a judge." she said firmly "I'm gonna get the divorce, Victor, whether you like it or not."

He suddenly punched the table so hard he made her jump on her seat and the guard who had escorted her to him immediately rushed to check on them. She just closed her eyes for a moment, then nodded and smiled at the man.  
"You really think— You're so stupid to think he's gonna marry you? I bet you told him everything about me. He's with you just because he thinks you're gonna commit suicide if he leaves you." he laughed as anger and bitterness filled the air.

"He loves me, Victor. Something you just can not understand. So fuck you. See you in court." she was about to hang up when he asked, well, he _ordered_ her to wait.

"Please… Please babe, think about it. You know we're meant to be together, you know that you still love me, even just a bit." he brought his eyes into hers and grinned "Please, Regina, forgive me. I love you and I want to prove it to you. I'm changed. I'm not gonna do those horrible things again, I swear! Everybody makes mistakes, right?"

She inhaled, exhaled, inhaled again:  
"Yes. But your mistakes were against the law." and, before he could reply, she hung up the receiver, stood up and called the guard to tell him that the visit was over.

**thoughts?**


	16. Chapter 16

**IT'S A BOMB! you've been adverted. **

**ps: sorry for the mistakes, I don't have a beta for this story!**

* * *

When Regina came back home, she knew she was keeping a secret, a huge one, bigger than her own self. Talking to Robin was out of discussion: she didn't want Victor to meet him, it was too dangerous: he wasn't going to stay in prison forever and she was scared of what he could do to them once he was finally free. She didn't want to put the person she loved with all of herself in danger.

And, anyway, she couldn't tell him when Angela was still living with them. She didn't deserve to be involved in all that crap, Regina thought.

She changed herself quickly, putting on the clothes she was wearing when Robin left her, then she took the tests she _truly_ had to check and sat on the couch. Robin and Angela came back only two hours later, holding a thousand colorful shopping bags.

"Regina? Oh, darling we went shopping!" exclaimed Angela, pure excitement still sparkling in her blue eyes.

"I see!" she giggled as Robin, clearly upset and tired as hell, put all the begs on the table, struggling not to let a single one fall.

"This is the last time you're leaving me shopping alone with my mother." he said, pretending to be angry at her. Regina burst into a laughter as Angela sighed:  
"I can't believe it, you still complain like a child for a couple of bags."  
Robin smiled, approaching Regina to give her a small, chaste kiss on her lips:  
"How was your day, my love? You like being a teacher?"

"So much." she bit her tongue and hesitated, hoping that he wouldn't notice the soft shade of red grown on her cheeks. "This is our last evening with my mother, what do you say we take her out tonight?"

"Hmm, sounds like a good plan. I'm just hoping it doesn't end like the last time."

"Oh, actually… I hope so, considering the way it ended." he smirked and his blue eyes sparkled mischievously. She returned his smirk with just the same intentions. She couldn't avoid to blush, though. She took his face in her hands and kissed him, this time languidly, passionately.

God, they missed each other way too much.

* * *

Angela had left since five days by then and, that Friday morning, Regina woke up with a very _unusual _need. She turned in between Robin's arms, until their nose tips were brushing against one another, and that was apparently enough to wake him up, too. It was five in the morning, it was early, they had plenty of time, he thought.

"Good morning, my love." she smiled, kissing his nose and giggling. She was all smiles and cuteness and, even though he didn't understand why she was in such a good mood at _5 am_, he didn't ask, he just enjoyed her being her beautiful self.

"Hmm, good morning." he breathed in his sleepy voice. "What happened?" his eyes were still heavy, while hers were wide open and already sparkling in excitement.

"I want cuddles." she giggled, as she buried her head under the blankets. Robin was perplexed cause, really, he thought she was in the mood for something… _else_. It was typical of her to wake up in the middle of the night with her _particular_ desires, but this time she was just… happy, and she wanted to share that feeling with him.

Robin took his time to fully wake up:  
"Regina, what the hell…?"

"Come under the blankets with me." it was a cold morning in Boston, it was raining and the idea of getting under the blankets with her, listening to the sound of the rain as he held her in his arms wasn't that bad. He smiled and did as she asked. "Can you hear it? I love it when it rains. The sound of rain, the smell of it." she whispered against his chest. "When I was a child I used to get under the blankets with a torch and one of my stuffed animals. I pretended it was my refuge from the whole world, my secret space. I cuddled my teddy bear, pretending it was a real person, until I fell asleep." she wrapped her arms tightly around him, then she placed her face, her ear right there, where his heart was beating. Robin's heart broke for how much he loved her, he couldn't help but kiss her head, in her hair, breathe her in and just think of how lucky he was to hold that miracle in his arms:  
"So now I am your teddy bear?" he giggled.

"Oh, yes. You are, Mr. Locksley. A handsome and sexy as hell one." he kissed him one more time, "I love you, Robin, you know that, right? I don't say it as often as you, but I love you." she smiled "I'm completely," another soft, delicate kiss "deeply," and another, rising to meet the soft flash of his neck "utterly in love with you." she made him smile as she finally met his lips and took them between hers. They stared into each other's eyes and he caressed her beautiful face.

"And I love hearing you say it." he returned every kiss she gave him, then she raised the blankets and exclaimed:  
"Shower. I don't want to be late. Today is gonna be a good day." she didn't even know why, but she just felt it. Robin smiled and, even though he had so many questions, he stayed silent as he watched her picking the underwear from her closet. He got up too and reached for her, wrapping his arms around her waist, feeling her naked body pressing against his. He left a quick kiss on her neck:  
"I'll make breakfast." Regina nodded slightly and gave him a beautiful smile, then they parted, each of them walking in a different room.

Angela used to prepare something for breakfast everyday; they still had plenty of food left to eat, so Robin only had to make coffee. He knew Regina needed some good coffee to start the day the right way and smiled as he poured it into her baby pink cup.

Regina walked out of the bathroom, only a couple of minutes later, wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around her half-wet body, with the most beautiful smile he had ever seen on her face.

"What's wrong?" he asked, giggling. She didn't reply, she just stared right into his eyes, with that beautiful smile, as if she was completely enchanted by him.

There was really something wrong that morning, or… maybe _too right._

"Come with me." she whispered, throwing her arms around his neck. He swallowed that wonderful smile as he covered her lips with his, in a sweet kiss that didn't take much to heat up.

"But I made coffee…" he laughed between kisses.

"It'll keep." she left the towel fall at her feet, presenting her naked body to him and watched as his eyes sparkled with sudden desire. Regina smiled, took his hand and walked him to the bathroom, in the shower, where she had left the water fall, warm and welcoming. He quickly slipped out of his trousers as he watched her biting her lip, as if she wanted to devour him.

He walked in with her, without even caring about the temperature of the water, his lips immediately assaulting hers as he trapped her body against the wall, caressing her every curve.

"I love you" she breathed as she finally felt him inside of her, filling her up completely. "I love you." she repeated, wrapping her arms firmly around him, feeling him moving inside and out, slowly driving her over the edge.

* * *

Smiling for the next three days, as if nothing had changed, as if she wasn't hiding two of the most important things ever happened to her from the man she loved; going out and coming back home, looking at him, kissing and making love to him as if everything was perfectly normal had been hard, probably the hardest thing she had ever managed to do.

She needed to talk to Robin, tell him everything about Victor, about _her._ It almost drove her insane, but she had made it.

As she walked into the courthouse, wearing the most professional outfit she owned, she felt as if a huge weight was about to be lifted off her stomach.

"Regina," Linda greeted her with a smile, as she stretched out an arm to hug her and leave a kiss on each of her cheeks.

Linda Rothman was the best lawyer Regina had ever met, not to mention she was one of her closest friends from high school. When she learned about the trial she was about to deal with to obtain the divorce, she immediately called her. She knew Linda, her temper, her determination, she trusted her completely.

"Hi Linda, thanks for coming."

"It's my job, darling. Are you ready?" she gave Regina one more smile, a sympathetic one.

She hesitated, but it only lasted for a moment: "I am." she was firm and sure. She was definitely ready. That horrible nightmare was going to be over soon, once and for all. She would never have to see Victor's horrible face again, and this time for real.

"Let's go, then."

Linda opened the door with the judge's name on it. As Regina took a huge, long breath to prepare herself to walk in, she imagined how it would look like to be in an actual law court for the first time. Was it going to be like in the movies? With horrible attorneys and a jury? The mere thought intimidated her and she had to hesitate a few more moments before finally taking some steps forwards and walk through that door.

It was nothing like it; actually it was just a simple office, with a desk, four chairs in front of it —two of which were already occupied by Victor and a man Regina had never seen, who was clearly his lawyer— and a judge in his early forties behind it. She was not in a court, it was…

"Good morning, love." Victor's cold voice suddenly shook her whole body and brought her back to reality: it didn't matter if it was a court or not, he was going to sit next to her and sign that godforsaken papers. She was finally going to get the freedom that she craved for. The freedom that she deserved.

She shivered as she took her seat next to him: they were so close again after so long and she was genuinely frightened. She suddenly felt better, though, when she saw Linda sitting right next to her and squeezing her hand.

"It's okay." she had whispered.

She swallowed the lump in her throat, took a deep breath and allowed herself to look at the man sitting next to Victor: he was short, grey hair and stubble. He was probably in his fifties. She shivered again at the thought that _that man _was representing a raper in court. God, she hated lawyers.  
"To begin with, I'd like to inform your clients about the deal that has been already signed by both of you." the judge begun to speak, looking at the two lawyers. "In case they accept the terms it'll make things easier for everyone and we won't have to invest a lot of money in a useless trial." Regina listened carefully to each word, and the man seemed to make sure she and Victor did.

The two women looked at one another for a moment, as Regina mentally begged Linda to explain what the hell he was talking about. Nobody told her anything about that deal! And… for Christ's sake, she _wanted_ a trial.

Luckily for her, Linda seemed to read into her mind:  
"Regina, dear, Victor will sign the papers," she smiled briefly "on condition that his sentence will be reduced to three years." she looked down, unable to stand Regina's confused and now suddenly angry eyes.

"What?" she exclaimed, so loud that she made the judge jump on his seat. "Three years? Is that what a man gets for abusing his wife, beats her and uses her like an object for almost four _fucking _years? It that what a _raper _deserves? Three years?" she was about to burst into tears, there was no way she was holding back. Her heart was beating so fast and _no, Mills, that's not good. You have to stay calm._

She turned to face Victor, who was smirking victoriously. The bastard.

"He will have to pay you alimony, you'll get half of the money he—"

"I don't give a shit about his money, I wouldn't touch a penny if my life depended on it! We'll go to court."

"Regina—"

"Miss Mills—"

"Three years. It's a shame. What will happen when he gets out of jail?"

"He'll be subject to a restraining order, he won't be able to get close to you, this is a promise." Linda explained, trying to calm Regina down by gently caressing her arm up and down, slowly. It was useless, though, cause Regina seemed to be on fire.

"And what about Robin? What about our—" she bit her tongue. _Shit. _"Our future." she corrected herself, hesitantly "The man I love will be constantly exposed to a risk I'm not willing to take. God knows what this crazy psychopath is able to do."

"Please calm down, Miss Mills." _That's right, Mills, calm down, there, like that, breathe._

The judge seemed to be quite annoyed as he furiously rubbed his temples in circles. He took a pen and put it down on the papers and presented them to Regina. "Mr. Hadler has already signed the deal, you have two minutes to decide, Miss Mills."

Regina found Linda's eyes, searched for an answer in them, something that told her that she knew what she was doing, but she found nothing. She was panicking almost as much as Regina was. She knew three years for rape and domestic violence were a total shame, but she had no power against it. And she absolutely didn't want Regina to face a trial, not after all she'd been through.

But was it really worse than living with the fear of seeing Victor again after only three years?

"Regina, please, think about it. Are you sure you're ready to go to court? Do you even understand what it means? You'll be forced to testify, to revive every single thing, until the very last day of torture." Rothman spoke quietly, making sure that the rest of the people in the room couldn't hear her. "Goldman —Victor's attorney— is a shark. He's gonna ask you questions about your personal life, you'll have to bring Robin into this, he's a witness. He'll discredit you, your story, what you've been through, he could even ask for probation. Are you sure you're ready for all this?" she looked straight into her dark eyes still filled wth tears.

"Could he really question the fact that I've been raped?" a tear managed to make its way down her cheek and Regina pressed her lips together, to keep herself from letting the others fall.

"Yes. They'll say you were cheating on him, with Robin, that you two wanted to frame Victor so you two could get married and get half of his properties. After all, dear, you were seeing Robin _before._ And the first thing you did when Victor got arrested was selling your house and moving in with Robin."

"That house was _mine, _I had every right in the world to sell it! And Robin was… Robin _is _the love of my life, I needed him everyday just like I need him now, from the beginning… now what? Now even you won't believe me!" there was no chance she was going to hold back her tears, it was far too late.

"Regina, if I didn't believe in you I wouldn't be here to represent you in a possible trial. I'm only saying what every defense attorney would say in court. And we both know how Victor Hadler can be convincing when he wants something." Linda Rothman was truly sorry for her friend, everyone could tell that. She knew she could win the trial if they only tried, but she didn't want Regina to revive it all over again. As a woman and a dear friend, she had to protect Regina.

"Thirty seconds." said Goldman, annoyed. _Fuck him. Fuck everything. _She quickly wiped away her tears, then turned to face the judge: she took the pen and, with a shaky hand, signed that goddamn deal.

"This is a shame. Everyone here knows that." she said, suffocating a sigh.

"No, this is what you get when you're too stubborn, Regina." she heard Victor saying, between giggles. God, _God, _she just wanted to turn around and punch him until his nose fell off his face, but she had to calm down once again. _Keep yourself together, Mills, you're better than that._ "I told you to change your mind, Regina. I offered you a fresh start and you… preferred this."

Regina had to take a deep breath, but she found the strength to smile, anyway:  
"Yeah, but guess what? The one who's wearing an orange jumpsuit here… is you. I'll walk out of that door and never see your face again." the mere thought made her smile grow wider. Yes, finally. "And you know who's waiting for me at home? Robin. The love of my life, the man I love with everything that I am, the man I'm about to marry. Oh yes, you heard me, Victor, we're getting married. Next month." just a small, innocent lie. "I'd invite you but I think you'll be kinda… busy." she smirked, and God, she felt so damn powerful. "He loves me, you know? He says that all the time, all nights while we make love." she watched as the smile on Victor's lips suddenly disappeared and got replaced by pure and simple rage, desire to explode or just to scream. "So who wins at the end of the day?" she raised an eyebrow and gave him one of her best grins.

That was the real Regina Mills, the strong, independent, tenacious woman that he had tried to suffocate more than once with every gesture, every word. She had risen from her ashes, just like a phoenix.

"I want to be left alone with my former wife." said Victor, firmly. "Is it possible, sir?" she looked at Regina, his blue eyes piercing into her dark ones, then he looked at the judge.

The man nodded hesitantly, then he faced Regina: "He cannot hurt you in any way. He's handcuffed, don't worry. We'll be right here, behind the door. If you need help, just yell." the man gave Regina an encouraging smile that she promptly returned, even though she was dying in the inside: the last thing she wanted was to be left alone with Victor again.  
But she could do that. She was stronger now. She wouldn't give him the satisfaction of thinking that she wasn't strong enough to be alone with him.

As everyone left, Victor begun his speech:  
"You know, I'm genuinely happy that we both signed that deal." he smiled, "because, unconsciously, you signed your death sentence." he said, his voice low, as if it was a secret between the two of them. Regina shivered, but she didn't allow herself to get scared enough by those words: she was sure he was going to say something like that. Always the same, old bastard. "I swear, Regina, I swear to God, in three years, when I'll be finally out of here, I'll find you. I will find you and your ridiculous boy-toy, Robin. And, oh, I will kill you both, just like I wanted to do to you four months ago, you remember? I should have finished you that night, as I held your fragile neck squeezed tightly in my hands—"

"Ok, that's enough." she shook her head, suddenly feeling the urge to throw up at those memories, at those _words._ "Enough!" she shouted this time and Linda was the first one to walk in, by her side:  
"It's okay. It's over." she whispered in Regina's ear. Yes, it was. At least for then.

"Good luck finding us, you son of a bitch." she spat, before taking her purse. She was ready to leave but… _oh, just one more thing. _The one she was sure it was going to hurt him more than anything.  
He would have been the first to know but, after all, it was worth it. She couldn't wait to see the pure sufferance, the hurt, the pain in his eyes. He deserved to be hurt just like he had hurt her.

"Oh and… Victor?" she made sure his eyes were buried into hers, then she gave into a laugh: "I'm pregnant."

* * *

**BOOM!**


	17. Chapter 17

**sorry I kept you waiting. I promise I'll update more often! Hope you like this chapter and... don't kill me! Love ya all!**

Fear.

Fear mixed with the satisfaction of yelling at him the only thing able to hurt him, to _destroy _him. The mixture of feelings Regina had inside of her at that very moment was so confused and strong that actually frightened her.

So many secrets, too many. She was hiding from the person she loved the most in the world, two of the most important events ever happened in her life. How did she find the strength to do it? How did she manage to keep her mouth shut for more than two weeks?

While she parked in front of their house, she accidentally touched her stomach and immediately smiled.

"Hello, little miracle." she whispered as tears already started forming into her brown pools. She had never talked to someone who was still not there. Or maybe she had, when she was a little girl, when she used to feel alone and pretended to speak to her imaginary friends. But it was different, back then, that was just the product of her imagination; the little miracle that was growing inside of her was real, even though she still found it hard to believe. That Friday morning had been the beginning of everything, when she realized her period was late. It never happened before, her period was just like her: punctual as a star. She remembered feeling like something was different inside of her, as if she was changing, since the moment she stared at herself in the mirror and then, for the first time in such a long time, she smiled at her reflection.

There was something different in her, it was clear. Her eyes were sparkling like never before and for no reason, she was glowing, in spite of everything -the horrible situation with Victor and the secrets she was carrying everyday. So she made what she thought it was the most natural thing in the world: she went to Robin, the love of her life, kissed him hard and walked him to the shower where they made love. Again.

Only the day after she did find the courage to buy a pregnancy test.

Waiting those seconds to finally see the result had been one of the most stressing moment of her whole existence. She just could't help asking herself all types of questions: what if it was all a huge mistake? What if she was giving herself false hope for something that was never gonna happen? She then took a deep breathe, pushed back every negative feeling and looked down to the test: positive. She was pregnant. For real.

She remembered she had cried, as she had never cried before, she was overwhelmed with a joy she didn't even know she could feel. She just wanted to scream, to thank whoever was up there for giving her this beautiful miracle that she had wanted for so long.

_Maybe it's all about timing_, Angela used to say. God, she was right, so _fucking_ right.

"Let's go to daddy, now, shall we?" she smiled "We have so much to talk about." her face darkened for a moment: Robin was going to be angry at her. A lot. They were _so_ going to fight again, she was sure about that. Hiding the whole divorce thing from him had been a mistake and the thought of fighting with him when she was carrying the product of their love was definitely something she didn't look forward to do.

She knew she had made the right choice: Victor had never seen Robin, nor did he know his surname. He was never going to find him, once he was out of jail.

It was the right choice, the only thing she could do to protect her family.

"Good evening, my love." she exclaimed with a beautiful smile, walking in with two huge shopping bags.

"Hey" she saw him smiling back at her and her heart stopped beating for a moment: how was it possible? How could he still have that effect on her, after all that time? "Why so late?" he approached her to help her with the bags and leave a small, chaste kiss on her lips.

_Shit. We're already there._

"Let's seat, shall we? We need to talk." she tried to keep it cool, but she was scared as hell. She had no idea of how he could react to such news.

"Regina, what's wrong?" he immediately asked, sitting on the chair next to hers. His eyes were already dark with worrying and Regina quickly shook her head and tried to calm him down by putting her hand over his warm, welcoming one.

"Nothing to worry about, Robin, really." she played with his fingers and gave him the best smile she could make in that very moment. "I took a day off today, as you may know." she had barely started talking when she noticed the way her voice was already trembling. Robin could only nod as he wrapped his fingers around hers, firmly. "I went to see Victor." she inhaled, and exhaled, slowly. "In court."

"What?" she saw his beautiful blue eyes widening and her heart almost dropped.

"I went to prison, last week." she hurried to say. "Seeing him after all this time was… I don't even have words to explain, but I was ready for it, Robin. Thanks to you I found the strength I needed to see him again and to ask him to finally divorce. He refused, of course, at first, but he had no choice. I called Linda, one of my few only friends, she's a lawyer and we both decided that this thing had to end in a court. Victor begged me to think about it, he said he still loved me, that he had changed…" Regina saw the way his blue eyes were turning darker, as if he was about to explode in something she wasn't sure how to name. She smiled and tightened the grip around his hand. "Of course, I didn't believe him. Not even for a moment, Robin. So we met again, today, in court, with our lawyers. He made a deal that they kind of… forced me to sign. He agreed on the divorce but I had to give something, too, cause that's how that crap works." God, she was about to cry again. How could she be so weak? "His sentence got reduced to three years."

"What?" he shouted, slamming the hand she was holding a few moments before against the cool wood of the table, making her jump on her chair.

"I-I know, I had the very same reaction but I had to sign that deal, Robin!" one tear managed to escape to her control and ran straight to the scar on her lip. "Linda said if I didn't sign I had to go through a trial, in front of a judge and a jury. His… horrible lawyer said I was going to revive any single detail of the horrible live we've spent together, every terrible moment I've been through, the violence, the abusing, the… rape." she was crying uncontrollably and, for Christ's sake, she just needed Robin to understand. She was scared. Fear was all she knew. "Linda said they could raise doubts about the whole thing. They could question my word, Robin, because you and I already knew each other during the last month of our marriage." she looked down and unconsciously laid a hand on her belly. It was then that she finally found the strength to smile again, through the tears. "Robin, at least this is over. We don't have to deal with Victor anymore. We can have our lives back and start all over!"

She saw him shaking his head and turning his back to her. Her stomach dropped and the breath caught in her throat.

She heard him taking a deep breath, then, after a long pause, he finally exploded: "You should have told me, Regina!"

"Robin, please, just try to understand, I just wanted to protect you!" she tried to reach for him but he wouldn't stop walking nervously around the room and she could say he was doing anything in order not to scream. She knew him far too well. "I didn't want him to see you, he knows nothing about you, not even your last name! It's the only way I had to protect you. This way he won't come after you when he's out of jail,_ as he promised to do!_" she bit her tongue: the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them. _Shit. Shit. Shit._

"What?"

"Nothing." she looked down, unable to stand his eyes.

"Regina…"

"Robin, it's nothing, really." she nervously passed her fingers through her dark hair.

"What did he say, Regina?" She didn't reply. She just wasn't strong enough to say more, to see his reaction. But she knew she was only going to make it worse by not saying anything at all so she exhaled sharply before continuing:  
"He just said he was going to make me paid for what I did to him. For sending him to jail." minimizing as much as she could appeared like a good plan to her. Robin didn't need to hear it all, it was stupid, really not necessary.

She saw him blinking a few times, metabolizing what he had just heard. He squeezed his eyes, took a deep breath and finally spoke: "You should have at least talked to me about it, Regina. That's what being in a relationship means. Hiding something from the significant other is _lying_ to them." he took his glass of wine and drank until the last sip, then he gave her his back, again, and walked into their bedroom, slamming the door behind his back, without saying another word.

Regina felt her heartbeat slowing down, as if her heart was about to stop beating. Then, after she had cried her soul out against the kitchen counter, she blinked back the last few tears she had left and cleaned the room, as best as she could, throwing the dinner he was preparing for them in the thrash. _Just like your relationship, Regina, good job. You just ruined the best thing ever happened to you. _

And then she went to sleep.

In the guests room. Again.

* * *

She only managed to fall asleep at 3 AM. When she had cried until the very last tear and she was too tired to keep her beautiful chocolate brown eyes opened any longer. She had her own arms wrapped around herself, as if she wanted to evocate the memory of Robin's ones, firmly holding her through the night. She found it hard to sleep without them, without his warmth and his scent all over her, filling her nostrils, her brain, her _heart._ She missed him so much and more than anything she was scared she was never going to feel his arms around her anymore.

She had cried again, blamed herself until she wished she could die right there for ruining the best thing ever happened to her, her reason to smile, her happy ending. Everything, for a stupid mistake she knew she was making since the very first moment she had walked out of their house to see her former husband.

While Regina was finally falling asleep, Robin was still staring at the ceiling, in the dark, refusing to let out a single tear. What an idiot he had been. How could he have left her like that? After all she had been through? He knew her well enough to know she had probably cried herself to sleep one more time, on the couch, because of him. He loved her enough to know he was going to forgive her anything, any mistake, as huge as it might be, because she loved her, unconditionally. He knew they were going to fix that, as soon as possible, but, for some reason, he couldn't stand the idea of spending another minute without her.

So he did it: he walked out of their bed, and put his pride aside to make room to something far more important for him: the love he had for that angel.

When he realized she wasn't sleeping on the couch, he immediately thought of the guests room and it was there that he found her: the pillow soaked with those damn tears, her beautiful hair in a cute ponytail and her lips contracted in sadness mixed with simple pain that made his heart clench in his chest. He immediately walked to the bed and tried not to wake her up as he slowly made his way under the blankets and wrapped his arms around her waist. Finally, where they belonged. He then left a small kiss on her ear before whispering something he knew she couldn't hear: "I'm an idiot, my love, forgive me."

He couldn't knew she had adverted the warmth of the body she had missed so much and was listening to every single word he said and was trying not to smile and cry again, this time with joy. She was complete again. "I can't live without you, Regina." he kissed her lobe again, and for some reason he felt like she was listening to his words: "I love you more than anything." and finally, he fell asleep.

When he woke up the morning after, he didn't find her next to him, in his arms, as he had left her. Her scent was replacing the emptiness she had left in that bed, and it was about to vanish. She must have left hours before. Maybe she was still angry.

_You're an idiot, Locksley. An idiot._

He checked if she was in the bathroom or in their bedroom, in the kitchen, but there was no trace of her. Then, he finally walked in the living room: on the table there was a note that smelled of her and a rose, a pink one, with a yellow envelop.

When he read the note a smile made his way through his face and all of his doubts and fears faded away:

**_I can't live without you, too. I love you with everything that I am, Robin. Open the envelop and come to me. Don't make questions, just follow your heart, let it lead you to me. I'll be waiting for you. _**

He did as she asked and opened the envelop, without hesitating any longer. She wasn't angry, not anymore, and she had been listening to every word he had said to her the night before when he though she was already asleep. Everything was going to be okay, nothing was gonna change between them… or maybe…? When he found out what was inside of the envelop a shiver ran through his back: a ticket. Destination… Atlanta? Was she insane? Why Atlanta? And… was she already there? She had taken the first plane without saying a word, without planning anything and… God, she must be crazy. And he couldn't help but smile because, _good God,_ he loved that side of her.  
He suddenly felt an incontrollable desire of laughing out loud. That woman…

With the ticket, there was also an address, written on a note. The street was far too familiar: it was the same as his mother, Angela. But the number was different, _23_, while his mom had the 58.

He was confused, he didn't understand, he had to give himself a few pinches to make sure she wasn't living one of his crazy dreams.

When he came back in their bedroom he realized something he hadn't noticed before: his bags were on the bed, half full. He smiled again: so, Regina was serious. Maybe she just wanted to take a few days off that crazy rollercoaster they still called life, maybe she just wanted to escape from all they'd been through. Maybe he just needed to stop making all those questions that were destined to remain without an answer and just follow his heart, as she had told him.

"God, Regina." he laughed, out of nowhere, then he looked back to the address and the desire of running to her, holding her tight in his arms and tell her how much he'd missed her won over everything and his heart couldn't stop beating wildly.

So he chose to follow it.


End file.
